5 years struggle, severe HOCD, TRANSEXUAL porn

Discussion in 'Success Stories' started by dr_persistent, Sep 19, 2017.

  1. cali4sto

    cali4sto Fapstronaut

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    yeah, the current situation does not help.

    but it's all about self control



    This playlist has helped me tremendously and there is a lot of value that can be extracted from it, just in case it might help you out

    cheers
     
  2. Emanel

    Emanel Fapstronaut

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    guys i'm a bit confused, it happens to me especially in the morning that i have HOCD pictures followed by fear of having an erection for those pictures, and it eventually leads me to have an erection
     
  3. cali4sto

    cali4sto Fapstronaut

    That's actually funny af

    Man don't let your mind fool you. Don't get your mind to care about gay thoughts.

    Just look at them and think how ridiculous they are and that you are not hiding from it, you look at the idea and make peace with it. Accepting the idea, understanding why it has happened (addiction, escalation) and how you are going to solve the issue and why is it important for you
     
  4. Amalia

    Amalia Fapstronaut

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    i want to ask you something...have you ever thought about or even went out to have sex with a transsexual? Or your addiction was just watching porn?
     
  5. ankith

    ankith Fapstronaut

    Well if a person has more severe hocd or tocd, they even go as far as testing their orientation by having a session with transexual or gay, but have a tremendous amount of guilt after that.

    It seems you wanted to know about your husband's addiction with trans escorts, I guess your husband is just deep in porn addiction rather than have a hocd or tocd, he doesn't seem to care about his orientation.
    Even I was that way, even though I'm not a gay, I have had sex with men just because I was so much deep in porn addiction, I wanted to make the porn into a reality, at some point, I even wanted to become a transexual, so yeah once you are in that train of thoughts, your brain would give you weird ideas...
     
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  6. Amalia

    Amalia Fapstronaut

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    Yes, my husband was very deep it that it looks like. He was texting with these transsexuals for at least 2 years that i know but i think texting goes more far back. He also start seeing them also 2 years ago he sais..i just cant get the actual truth from him, thats my feeling. He is saying now that he stopped, he doesnt want that anymore and he wants to fix our mariage. But he just went one time to therapy because i told him he should, but he doesnt want to go anymore, he thinks he can handle it. I dont think i can go back to him, i am struggling with him being attracted to me ever...He also tells me rhat he just went there for some anal sex, which i can't buy, he went to see someone with a penis for a reason...the penis, right?
     
  7. ankith

    ankith Fapstronaut

    First of all, I know this is a shocking thing to you but I want you to calm down. Things like recovery and rehabilitation take long time and need people who are willing to come out of the addiction. You see, I've been trying to come out of my addictions for past 12 years and I'm still on day 6, not everyone can be like me, but what I'm saying is it takes lot of time.

    The next thing I want to mention is, if he was attracted to a penis he would straight away go and meet a man rather than a trans, but generally people who watch trans p or meet them are people who want novelty in their sex addiction, so please don't jump into conclusion.

    Finally the last important thing is, tell your husband that he can't control himself and come out of addiction by himself, when he has gone this much deep. he needs to join a group therapy sessions like SA, SAA etc or atleast ask him to join this website and get help, he needs to get an accountability partner who is someone going through the struggle like him or someone who has overcome the addiction and give daily updates to that partner. He needs to work out things by himself and not need someone like you to push him in the back to make go to therapy or talk with accountability partner.

    P.s: tell him, it will take around 2 years of abstaining to come out of addiction...
     
  8. Amalia

    Amalia Fapstronaut

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    Thank you so much for your encouragement. I just cant wrap my head around the fact that he went and did things with some shemales. Things that make me cringe when i think about. It kind of make me sick. After 15 years of mariage, which who knows how much was under this addiction..
     
    ankith likes this.
  9. ankith

    ankith Fapstronaut

    You are welcome. Yeah, it does pains me to see how your addiction affect your loved ones, I've seen lot of significant others going into depression, divorce and there are some who themselves have become addicted trying to know how this works. I hope things turn out better for you and your husband, just sit down talk everything properly, don't be judgmental when your are talking with him or else he won't open up to you. Tell him that there are tons of people out here who are trying to overcome their addictions.

    Show him this documentary if possible: https://brainheartworld.org/ All the best :)
     
    Amalia likes this.
  10. cali4sto

    cali4sto Fapstronaut

    As a guy who is hetero but has had sex with a transgender, I literally went as well for the anal sex and the extra dopamine rush that it gives you

    One must quit porn to overcome the addiction
     
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  11. Amalia

    Amalia Fapstronaut

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    He was watching shemale porn maybe at least 13 years back, maybe more...i didnt understand why i never felt the desire and other things that a normal couple should feel when they have intimacy. I was struggling with understanding it, i felt like whatever i was doing his desire will not be there, and i finally find out why about 2 months ago. Its devastating..
     
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  12. cali4sto

    cali4sto Fapstronaut

    he has to connect with himself, yoga, psychedelics, sports, semen retention, sexual transmutation, etc.
     
    Amalia likes this.
  13. Amalia

    Amalia Fapstronaut

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    He doesnt want to. He is saying that if he is doing for us ok, he will go to therapy, if not he can control his life...
     
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  14. cali4sto

    cali4sto Fapstronaut

    I don't know

    You should see what kind of people you want in your life, if he's not willing to do anything maybe you should move on
     
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  15. Amalia

    Amalia Fapstronaut

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    I watched all this. Very interesting, thank you for the link. I will give it to him and see the reaction.
     
    ankith likes this.
  16. ankith

    ankith Fapstronaut

    I'm glad that you found it interesting, I was literally crying when I was watching the 3rd episode of the documentary. It's just a temporary motivational video, but if it helps your husband to take this seriously in tackling the porn issue, then it has done the job, then rest is upto his willpower, strategy and taking help from the Nofap community.

    Btw what kind of person your husband is? Does he dismiss all of your suggestions or is he being this way only when it comes to porn addiction?
     
  17. Amalia

    Amalia Fapstronaut

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    He is usually taking my suggestions, i am always the one that is running the family life and he is just doing things (bot that i want it like that...). This came to me as such a big surprise, i would of never ever ever thought he can do this. And when i say this i actually mean taking the phone and message to escorts for years and then actually going with them. He would never take any initiative, i am amazed how he was doing all these things in the background. I knew our intimate life was not ok, i was not ok, i was pursuing him for it and it was not at all satisfactory... And i did opened discussions about it, i tried everything I thought possible to understand why he is not attracted to me , and he was always like a wall, no explanations, just saying that its not true-he is attracted...But the facts were saying otherwise. He had not pleasure in doing things to me and i would feel that, he would not reach an ending almost ever, all of it was not how its suppose to be. And was happening only if i asked for it, was always me initiating... and was just aprox once a month...
    He had many occasions where he could of open and say something, but he didnt, i find out by myself by coincidence, and since i find out he give me the truth little by little as i find out more in my research...I actually feel that i still dont know all, he keeps saying that it doesnt matter because its in the past and he is not doing it anymore. But the what i find out scares me so much, how he was texting so much with shemale escorts for the least last 3 years, and seeing them for the last 2 years that i know. He would not give me any other information more than what i have proof for, trying to minimise all the time.
     
  18. Lol2002

    Lol2002 Fapstronaut

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    Hi most of you guys are guys but I’m a female with the same problem and my mind keeps thinking I’m gay when i know deep down I’m straight I’ve never found girls attractive but this is now over taking my life I get suicidal thoughts and I’m only 16 I’ve never gotten thoughts like this. I’ve been having less anxiety after accepting my fear but sometimes I get scared that I accept it and I keep imagining me with a girl I rlly dislike it all the time I imagine it plz help me Ik ima late
     
  19. Uriichi

    Uriichi Fapstronaut

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    First please don't be suicidal and do something u will regret, second why do you have these feelings is it because of porn, or you just have these feelings??? Also your young so your at a age where ur gonna be going threw a lot of emotions and figuring out who you are as a person...even tho u have thoughts today doesn't mean they will be there forever, for lack of better wording, this might be something u will eventually grow out of but just calm down and take it one day at a time
     
  20. Randombro

    Randombro Fapstronaut

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    Hi, create a thread and write all relevant informations. Maybe we can help you
     

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