538 days. Extremism vs naturality in NoFap

nicely said. there is a lot of extreme elements to the modern manhood in many ways.

 

I think that is were many of us fail often times.
We fall back into old habits, feel ashamed, get disgusted with ourselves and as a protective reaction we try to be even stronger, harder, better, faster next time which is bound to fail and this vicious cycle strenghtens itself.
Instead one could take a step back, breathe, see were it went wrong, understand oneself and the empotions involved and strategize the appropriate steps with a calm mind.

 

Naturality forever, all extremes lead to nothing, the virtue is in the middle, a virtous and elevated middle.

Hell mode? I prefer Heaven mode haha.

Very true this part, I know a lot people that did nofap with extremist mindset and turned in idiots, thinking that they are superior people simply because they dont pmo and others do. The correct way to think is to help these people and have humility.

Discovering the other and have a "foot on ground" mindset

 

It’s one of those posts by you @modern milarepa where deep inside you sense that it’s the truth but there are times where I ‘forget’ about my inner truth / things I know intuitively because the ego or the society’s culture can blur that wisdom, or I somehow just lose clarity.

And this thread also needs an important side node.

If people have bad habits, like PMO or smoking for example this cannot apply to them, because the body will automatically grab the cigs or PMO, you need then some mental fortitude to change the course of action that your body would subconsciously choose to do. In that case moving along with your natural flow is not an option because the natural flow takes you to the same toxic behaviour.

That’s why I use a heavily restricted phone so I don’t even think about fapping. Since implementing that I can reach longer streaks without even thinking about fapping because it’s simply not an option. This way I am trying to subconsciously change the body so that it’s no longer used to fapping. And it seems to be working.

 

Monk mode is the best as I discovered. Since feeling much closer to God after leaving FB. Problem with social media and YT, IG etc. is that they use pretty much the same algorithm - young beautiful girls are shown first, whoever is poor, no so beautiful or disabled are hidden. That partially explains high depression rates nowadays since people think that everyone else is doing better than they. Also for recovering addict its pretty hard not to lust with eyes by not clicking on that beautiful girl profile etc. Could say a lot more but in short as less internet you use as more happier you will be and more time you will have for real life productivity..

 

I was never much into Fb, Ig and the like but still felt that way all the time. I think it's part of the human condition too without these sites, that as soon as youre an outcast and get dealt some shitty cards in life, its easy to get that cognitive bias.
But learning gratitude, humor and making the absolute best of any situation, as well as learning about supposed succesful people and how they might be broken inside can help. Not everyone of course.

I agree tho that limiting ones daily internet access is just as necessary esp. since it correlates a lot with porn addiction and might just become your methadone instead of facing the underlying issues.
(says the guy whos just been 3 hours on netflix while procrastinating on some important stuff I need to get out right now!)

 

Well, man that is also algorthm of life. - Old people ussualy sits at home, women after 40 are almost invisiblez you notice young beautiful girls on the street. Disabled people too usualy sits at home, you dont notice ugly cars hit notice expensive cars. In grocery shop expensive stuff is in the level of eyes and cheap stuff are down u der the knees almost on the floor where no one looks. We live in the world where people mostly see what others want them to see.

Also talking about netfix and YT, I think they have similar time stealing algorythm - they show more videos in what you are interested the most, so its hard to stop without hard willpower and strick time managment.

 

depends, tools like "df youtube" or "leech block" can make life on yt pretty easy without having to use up willpower, allowing you to only get what you specifically search for and restricting time of use.
And 80% of netflix is garbage so that doesn't hold me there for extended periods of time . On occasion it can be good to cut yourself some slack tho as long as one is aware of said mechanisms.