6 months and feeling strong

Discussion in 'Success Stories' started by Much Ado About Nutting, Jan 23, 2020.

  1. Much Ado About Nutting

    Much Ado About Nutting Fapstronaut

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    I finally have gotten to 6 months no porn! This has been a difficult journey.

    I first did no porn back in 2015 and I was able to get 10 months on my first try. Back then I immediately felt pretty energized and the so called superpowers of giving up porn. Was more confident, more disciplined, more determined, etc. Back then I ended up also fixing my dating life and started dating and having more sex and met some amazing girls. I felt like I had finally reached my sexual potential.

    But... I started watching porn again after 10 months because it didn't seem like that big of a deal. I had given it up for 10 months on my first try, and I had fixed my dating life so I figured I was good. But that just made it more of a struggle.

    From around October of 2015 to July of 2019 I went back and forth between watching porn and not watching it. In any given year I probably went the majority of the time not watching it... but I would always go back. So basically not watch porn for anywhere between 1-3 months and then watch porn for a week or two and then go back to it. It was a really difficult struggle and I couldn't break free of the bad habit. I would realize how bad it was for my self image and self esteem, that it hurt my confidence, etc. But I would pretty much always find some frustration or excuse to watch it from time to time.

    This time around now that I have 6 months I'm not sure what I did differently. There were plenty of times before when I was really motivated and ended up failing. So I wasn't more motivated. Maybe it was just my time and I was exhausted with it.

    What I can say now is that I FEEL FREEDOM FROM THIS BAD HABIT FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2015. I really truly feel a change. I no longer think about watching porn and I don't even want to watch it. It does feel like the bad habit is removed. It's very difficult to describe this difference but it's something I can see in my own thoughts and habits. I definitely had this back in 2015, but I didn't appreciate it back then. I didn't think giving up porn was that big of a deal. Now I know different. I've worked hard to get here and earn this freedom and I don't want to give it up. I'm going to keep working toward keeping and enjoying this freedom.

    Truthfully, this was the biggest problem in my personal life holding me back. It's like I couldn't develop or evolve as a person until I got past this and solved this. It's really just a giant very difficult puzzle and test to solve and move beyond. Now I feel much better about myself and I can be more optimistic about the future. All of my personal habits have improved by a lot. If I watch porn it negatively affects other areas of my life and drags me down and limits my potential.

    So right now... I'm going to the gym DAILY and I feel stronger and in better shape than ever. I meditate 6 days a week for 30-45 minutes average. I go to bed 5 days a week at 8:30 and wake up at 4:30am, I take care of myself and dress nice. I journal regularly, I'm excited about working. I'm building a nice social circle of friends. I eat ultra healthy and cooking is a new hobby. So personally things are going great! With porn none of this would be nearly as maxed out.

    What I did this time was basically this: Early on I would log into a note into my phone every single time I thought about porn... without exceptions. I pretty much always had my phone so if I had a thought I would write down the time. After writing down the time I would then read another note I wrote that had the benefits of no porn, a description of how I feel when I watch porn, and also a list of actions to take every time I thought of porn. The list is:
    • Recognize thoughts and don't minimize danger
    • record the time
    • go to a spiritual practice (ask for strength and direction)
    • do something productive
    Another thing that really helped was that I got an accountability partner that I talk to on WhatsApp in real life. Internet accountability partners never worked for me. We're still talking on WhatsApp and this has helped me keep things real.

    What also helped was that around a month I had a girl I had previously dated come visit and we went on a road trip for a month and a half and I had regular sex with her which was great. For me there is nothing like a real girl that makes me forget about porn. After she left I kept traveling and dated two more girls on vacation. Right now I've been single for a month or so and sooner or later I'll meet someone. That's the other benefit of no porn... being 100% into a partner and really looking forward to sex. Fortunately now I feel like I have a lot of good momentum and good freedom so watching porn isn't even tempting. I know how much I have to lose if I watch it.

    Other than that what I have come to realize is that porn is a very bad habit that is hard to break. I don't like to complicate it too much with all of the science stuff. That may work for some people and that's fine. But for me it's a bad habit. I've had to replace it with better habits and it is now for the most part completely gone. If I watch porn again of course the habit comes back just as bad as ever. So it's just prioritizing good habits and enjoying freedom as I try to get to a year.

    The last thing I guess I should mention is the internet. I generally stay away from the internet in general. Overall it actually feels like a bad habit itself. it can be a useful tool for information but I end up just wasting time. So I didnt use this forum this time, I didn't spend time on you tube, I don't even open my computer for months it seems. I read about sports a little on my phone but thats about it and I honestly want to give that up also. I don't try to limit what I see on the internet, I just stay away in general.

    So thats it, wish me luck as I go toward a year
     
  2. SirErnest

    SirErnest Fapstronaut
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    All sounds sensible. Good work! Thanks.
     
  3. Great job, amazing benefits. Good thing too that you develop all of the areas of your life and not only try to get rid of PMO. That's the best approach that wields tons of benefits. Stay strong and keep growing.
     
    SirErnest likes this.
  4. winningover

    winningover Fapstronaut

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    Did you go through any withdrawals that were psychological in nature first time or this time when you abstained from porn?
     
  5. Much Ado About Nutting

    Much Ado About Nutting Fapstronaut

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    It's hard to say. I definitely had low self esteem, felt hopeless, felt pathetic, felt depressed. I don't know if these were psychological withdrawals... I think of them more as the negative things that happen to me when I watch porn
     
    [email protected] likes this.
  6. TheMoose

    TheMoose Fapstronaut

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    Well done and good luck in the future!
     
  7. PowerfulSRE

    PowerfulSRE Distinguished Fapstronaut

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  8. quit@porn

    [email protected] Fapstronaut

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    Your experience shows that this habit is not one way round. We are prone to fall back. Thanks for sharing. Have happy prosperous life
     
  9. quit@porn

    [email protected] Fapstronaut

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    Best luck bro
     
  10. victorious136

    victorious136 Fapstronaut

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    nice!!! especially thanks for sharing the experience of getting back to porn!
     
  11. Robot Stark

    Robot Stark Fapstronaut

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    Your experience is fantastic.
    Can I reprint your story on the Chinese website? It will inspire a lot of young people.
     
    [email protected] likes this.
  12. china-kk

    china-kk Fapstronaut

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    哈哈可以可以,核工程师
     
  13. Robot Stark

    Robot Stark Fapstronaut

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    哈哈哈,多谢。你有我的QQ? 太神奇了!!!
     
  14. china-kk

    china-kk Fapstronaut

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    我不是此文作者o_O,我是晨晨-cay chou
     
  15. Robot Stark

    Robot Stark Fapstronaut

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    我的天啊,你在这里。
     

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