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Discussion in 'Events & Challenges' started by 2525, Oct 27, 2017.
DAY 30/90 Completed . The urges were at peak for 2-3 days till yesterday but today was easy. A wet dream last night calmed down the urges . Also I realise it is not only about what I become after 90 days but also about how I utilise these PMO free 90 days.Today was a great start and I had a super productive day.Looking forward to 2 months of crazy work ethic and discipline .
WE GOT THIS BROS.
Day 4/90 I believe. I saw some inspiring illustrations of what it means to reach 90 days and the worthwhile nature of this struggle. Now I'm even more encouraged to keep up this fight, despite my waning energy and alone time due to my sickness. Time to keep going!
Came from a tour.... Day 15 soon going to end ..It's amazing without pmo
day 2 completed.
Going well for me and actually I am keeping myself busy while surfing net, been able to overcome urges.
But while I go for sleep I feel few urges but keeping myself cool to overcome my addiction and I will be successful in this.
I'm in. Gonna get somewhere this time round
First few days (4-7)are really brutal and to maintain your streak you must should indulge in some other activities of your real interest or activities which make you feel real good. A good routine could also help as it will leave you with no time for pmo.
i am in day 0
Hey there.. it wasn’t me that created this milestone system I found it ready. That’s a really good point. Not really I don’t have a reward system I think I should do
Yeah, the rewards are good because you're conditiong yourself to the whole thing, and the brain will understand more that it is worth
Productive day. I'm tired and a bit frustrated. Had a lot of urges. One day closer
welcome my friend, stay with us, sharing not only motivates you but also motivate others. here´s some pointers to a safe and strong reboot.
1 - know your enemy. read this book "wack: addicted to internet porn" from noah church, it´s free on his website.
2 - recognize beyond any doubt that your an addict. not someone who has a bad habit. on "wack" there´s a test to see how deep is the addiction and how much is damaging you.
3 - once you accept the truth, recognize that you can´t control PMO usage, don´t waste precious time of your life trying to fit porn in your life, you can´t control this thing. “Oh… maybe on these days, or only on that days….” Forget it. See for yourself, if you could control this you wouldn´t be an addict in the first place. the only way to break free from the addiction is to abstain from all sexual indulgence till a point you have no desire to PMO. 90 days usually is the standard time, sometimes it may take long.
4 - motivate yourself daily to do the reboot. PMO destroys a lot of areas in life, but what is that one thing that really pisses you off? Why do you really need to overcome the addiction? What´s your central issue? find it!!! That´s your main motivation.
Motivate several times especially in the first weeks, cause the urges and porn thoughts will be very alive and kicking. motivation can come from a text, a video, a music, whatever, anything that reminds you do keep doing the reboot.
5 – you can´t do this alone. Studies show that is very rare to someone to overcome an addiction alone, almost impossible. That´s because the very feeding ground of addictions is isolation. So the treatment goes in the exact opposite direction. You need partners, groups, therapy, internet forums, whatever, do as you prefer, but stay in touch.
6 - create physical barriers against PMO cause willpower alone will not do. this means install porn blockers and usage of electronic devices with screens facing exposure. in extreme cases forbide yourself from being home alone with electronic devices.
7 - delete any sexual/erotic material that you have. if you keep something with you that means you´re keeping the flame alive.
8 - withdrawal is hard, sometimes harder than the addiction. but after some days/weeks the withdrawal ends, the addiction never ends. Prepare yourself for fatigue, irritation, deep sadness, insomnia, brain fog, headaches, etc... but don´t worry, after a while energy will start to rise and you´ll feel amazing . it´s worth all the efforts. to minimize withdrawal stay well fed, hidratated, an build a good sleep hygiene. sleeping pills and antidepressives can also help.
9 – Avoid alcohol and sugar consumption. These substances drain energy and promote lethargy and depression. Never get drunk. Excessive alcohol prevents your brain for rewiring, leads to (extra) fatigue, irritation and brain fog. it will also deplete your willpower making you more likely to relapse.
10 – practice meditation or any kind of relaxation technique daily. This is very important to calm the body against urges and help cope with withdrawal symptoms.
11 - in the reboot you´ll have flatline periods (total absence of sexual desire) and periods of strong sexual urges. to deal with urges my recommendation is to let them be, just observe them, don´t engage in them. keep doing whatever you´re doing. the urge may be very strong, but it will pass, it will pass totally. in extreme cases, click the panic button on nofap, get out of the house or take a cold shower.
12 - do physical exercise regularly. that will boost your mood and release sexual energy in a positive way.
13 - write a goodbye letter to porn. be brutally honest. an addiction is also a relationship so cry your heart out, say all the things you want to say, and say goodbye.
14 - keep busy. this is the step i found more important (side by side with the daily nofap motivation). why? because you´re not only abstaining from porn/masturbation, you have to replace those behaviours for others. or else porn will return, no matter how much time as gone by. So fill the free time, work on your passions, live your dreams. one day at a time, create an epic life.
15 - the addictive mind will not break easily. it´s likely that you´re gonna relapse, relapse a lot. the key is too keep going, never give up. if you don´t give up you will make it. Garanteed. That aplies with anything in life. You just have to want it, badly. If you want it you´ll get it, you will find a way. Garanteed. All the excuses that we put up “oh i´m not strong enough”, “not smart enough” “not good looking” “not rich enough”, “i´m super addicted” “oh, i´m just unlucky” bla bla it´s all ideas!!! beliefs that are not tested. Excuses to justify failure and make you feel pity for yourself while time is passing by.
Plain and simple, if your not getting what you want, it´s not because of circunstances, it´s due to lack of determination. If you focus on it, you will make it. Perseverance is the game changer. So in each relapse try to know something about yourself, how your mind works, what are the triggers. knowledge is power. If you relapse try not to binge (relapse multiple times), the bigger the binging the harder will the withdrawal.
16 - avoid any kind of sexual stimulation, whether by touch, sound or image. stimulation will create dopamine rushs in the already unbalanced brain, increase urges and after that is hard to stop. So don´t believe your mind if it tells you to peak, it never wants just that. after that, the addiction will kick in strongly and start pounding and pounding until it breaks you and put you on your knees. The same goes for edging. So it´s better to not even start. if you have a partner and want to have normal sex try to abstain at least on the first weeks to give the brain a rest. If you do sex but thinking on porn that means you´re using your partner as an object. That´s a relapse.
17 - you can never go back to porn. this probably is the harshest truth you can hear (it was mine, and it is for many people) but it´s the truth nevertheless. why? 3 major reasons.
- you´ll be an ex-addicted, always. that means you will never have a normal relation with porn, your soft spot is porn. if you engage in PMO again, sooner or later you´ll become an addict, again.
- PMO happens in isolation, there´s no social PMO, which means that not only your likely to associate exciting feelings to PMO behaviour, but also negative feelings, which means that you´ll associate PMO with pretty much everything that happens to you. In fact this is the core mechanism for addictions to surface.
- in high speed internet, there´s an infinite suply of sexual material, new sexual material. dopamine is released not only by viewing and fapping but also by searching novely. once you give your brain a taste of the "stuff" it will crave for more. always more.
18 - destroying any hope of going back to PMO will make the reboot stronger and more determinated. This is because some fapstronauts secretly do the reboot in order to gain control over porn, so to use it in moderation. But as we have seen before, this is impossible. Plus if the goal of the reboot is to use porn, porn is still in the horizon. This becomes a contradiction to the present streak and will make it much harder to endure. On the other side all ex-addicts firmly agree that no one ever wants to go back to porn cause life now is too good to be true, too good to go back to hell.
19 – the reboot implies 100% commitement. If you don´t take it serious neither will be the results. If you take it serious, like if your life depends on it, the change is at your hand. You´ll become a new person: happy, faster, stronger, smarter, confident, social, peaceful. You´ll become a high successful person and there will be pretty much nothing you can´t acomplished because after conquering your own demon you can conquer anything.
20 – remember that nofap is something you don´t do. So what matters is what you actually do. Live your life, go for your dreams and passions. Don´t give importance to what day you´re in, don´t think on the 90 days. Impulsivess is an old friend of the addiction. So just take it one day at a time, one stone at a time.
i wish you the best luck, strengh and focus my friend. believe in yourself, you can do it.
sorry to heat that. see if you can learn something with the fall. and when you feel ready, restart go my friend.
11 my friends