Separate names with a comma.
Discussion in 'Events & Challenges' started by 2525, Oct 27, 2017.
Cool! Let's do it then.
Day 0! Long way to go.
Day 2/90 No PM
Day 455 at attempting this challenge
Day 159 weight training (M, W, F)
Lifestyle: No caffeine or alcohol and reduced desserts
I need to be honest here for a minute with you all and maybe what I say can help some of you. I have slowly been falling off the wagon to some degree or another on all 4 or my vices listed above that I am trying to reduce or quit. The only thing I am doing well and consistent is weight lifting. Over the past year or so, I have been slipping back into those bad habits such as peeking at porn or porn subs (to get a dopamine fix but usually avoiding M or O in order to not break my steak), drinking caffeinated beverages such as tea coffee pop etc. and binge drinking alcohol on occasion about once a month on average. The end result of my backslide and lack of self-discipline is not good for my health. I got the results of my blood test for PSA levels (Prostate Specific Antigen) yesterday and it was back up to 6.9 which is high for someone my age (57). By making lifestyle changes I post daily, I got it down to 2.1 about a year ago. 6.9 is back to where it was before I made these lifestyle changes such as removing PMO and edging, seriously reducing caffeinated coffee, tea or drinking any booze. I believe the big culprit of screwing up my PSA numbers is PMO, especially edging for hours. Don't fool yourself everyone, excessive PMO'ing has repercussions on your health, especially your prostate which is basically the pump to send out the semen when you ejaculate. When you get to 50 yo and above, your prostate enlarges naturally and chronic PMOing makes it enlarge even more. When this happens, it basically chokes your urethra and doesn't allow urine to flow freely out of you when peeing. The end result is waking up and peeing often through out the night which sucks because it messes with you having a good sleep. Alcohol also irritates the prostate and makes symptoms worse and so does caffeine (or any diuretic drink).
Good news, is I am back on the wagon now and am more determined than ever to do this nofap challenge once and for all and stop my self-destructive behaviour and slowly destroying my health and marriage with PMO. I will also be more self-disciplined at not drinking any caffeinated beverages or alcohol too. Booze often leads to relapses for me anyway and caffeine makes me hyper and takes me out of being in the moment. I can do this and must do this or face the health consequences.
Sorry for the long rant but I hope this kind of info is a wake up call for everyone and makes people realize there are actual negative health repercussions to a lifetime of fapping (like I have done for 43 years) so quit while you still have your health. Don't wear out your reproductive equipment or burn out the pleasure center of your brain with super stimulants like porn. Keep it real with people not screens and for your partners pleasure!
Your brother in this struggle.
am joining the challenge day 0. i wish you all good luck!
Come on @Homo Deus one more day left!! This is amazing, you will be able to go for a bigger challenge and be closer to complete your reboot. Good job man keep going!
I am reporting on day 71/90. Feeling good.
day 34/90...still more than half of journey left...
#day 1 had to restart counter from a relapse i had at #day 22 we not giving up we grinding in hard
Day 3 Relapsed.
Ok guys, it is now 01:33 am but still I am deciding to put a little more words into this post.
I am noticing some improvements due to my participation in the daily meetings and self-growth and rewiring exercises.
However I haven't been exercising alot, as I lack the energy and reason to do so. And I also haven't been writing here a lot. I just started thinking that this is starting to get pointless because it doesn't matter at the end, sometimes it keeps me from relapsing, but I just extend the time until my next relapse and I end up getting back into the cycle.
I know that's negative thinking bullshit, but I can't really test my improvements socially to get some feedback on my results, I think that's the thing.
I'll keep writing here, it's definitely helping. I need to continue more.
I have been meditating everyday, with some exceptions where I skipped, because I forgot.
The videogame development is starting to get very tedious (but that's normal, it is also a still my learning process, so even more tedious lol )
I have no one to really talk to, not even that "community", they are really fantastic people, but when I talk with them, most of them answer a few times with basic answers and then stop, because they don't have time or whatever. just bullshit. And sometimes I have some really neat conversations.
But it doesn't matter how much work I put into it, I am always the person who writes. Which means, they don't really want to talk with me 100%.
It's kinda funny,because sometimes I think that, even if they were dying and they had one choice to talk to me, most of them would rather just die. lol xD
i am taking this with humour.
But I am very grateful for this community because they are honest and they participate full out in the exercises (which often requires you to come out of your comfort zone).
Which I did almost every time I had the chance.
There are good days and bad days on that regard, but never is there anyone, that starts a conversation with me, just to talk. It always has to be me. Probably it's because I have debts to pay the universe for jerking off so much...so I have to talk...lol just kidding.
If I just talk with my family members, I just get retardedness back. Maybe some can relate.
My family that I live with is not very coherent, one is rude , arrogant and depressing, the other one talks about covid-19 every day. And they are not like most regular troubling people, they are full with shame and deep ingrained mental issues. And stuborness on top of that, so they don't even think about anything close as to self development. They are so built up with self-denial and pride that it is estimatable that many of them will probably never change.
Also the current virus situation honestly instills very few to no worry in me whatsoever, I am just responsible with the actions I take everyday , but that's it...I don't treat it as if it was a series on Netflix like many people do and theorizing the end of the world (this behaviour is really just a catalyst to create problems where non existed, like, training people to predict negative outcomes all the time, whereas most outcomes are so far fetched, they are just abstract and products of imagination and many people end up, well, panicking, does it make sense? No. Do people think about that?, no. They just watch that, like, well like PMOing lol). Essential information is important but not that miscellaneous drama entertainment based bullshit that you get on the news every fucking day lol. For then acting out impulsively.
I avoid them as much as possible. Many of my close family members put themselves rather on a pedestal or think of themselves as superior. And honestly there is no family member of mine that I admire. Surely many did admirable things, like my grandfather, but admirable to them, it's part of their pride not mine.
Hard work by itself, is not something admirable to me. One can be really stupid or ignorant and work hard, while being a shitty person and not achieving anything of matter but material posessions and a life that is merely in alignment with their pride, status and reputation.
And one can be a good person, being a light to other people and achieve even more with less effort. And most importantly achieve things that truly matter to them. For that one must understand himself truly and not be busy with self-denial and protecting his pride...which is childish bullshit
I am very grateful for my family yes. For everything that they did for me and where I got until now. All of my safety and comfort I have to thank my grandfather and my mother and the rest of my family in gerenal.
However that is about as far as it goes. I love them. but mostly from a distance.
I just needed to get this out of my system I guess.
All the best to you guys! And much love!
Hate to say this buh relapsed again starting all over from day #0 no giving up no excuses we going to make it to the 90 days make ...counter starts #day o
Day O. All in. One day at at time!!
Well done pal! Inspiring.
Day 2/90 done.
Getting 1-2 hours extra per day
Reached Day 1/90