90 DAY challenge: NoFap, I came crawling back...

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction Recovery' started by tmonk, Nov 1, 2014.

  1. tmonk

    tmonk Fapstronaut

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    Hi guys!

    I'm a student from England, 23 years old. I am typing this at 4.50am, having just had a very embarrassing experience in the bedroom.

    Let me explain my history with NoFap. I quit NoFap a few weeks ago, after convincing myself that I did not really need to do the NoFap challenge. I have tried NoFap numerous times before, and have only managed 13 days without PMO at the maximum in the past. I have a porn induced fetish, and this is why I came to NoFap.

    I never had a problem with ED. That is to say, I never have problems getting an erection, even kissing a girl is enough. But I need to ask for your advice Fapstronauts, because I have never managed to get a girl as far as the bedroom before, yet tonight I would have had sex with a very pretty girl had it not been for my complete inability to get it up. The question I have is, I had a LOT to drink tonight, and was very drunk. But still, there was nothing happening downstairs. Should I be worried or was it just the drink?

    I am going to try and do the NoFap challenge anyway, because according to BrainBuddy, an iphone app for overcoming porn addiction, I am highly addicted to porn, and my dopamine baseline is 68%.

    What's weird is I literally have the fear about ED now, which is a completely new feeling, since I assumed that when I was actually in bed with a girl it would be no problem getting it up.

    Anyways, I'll do my best to reach 90days. I think NoFap is a great resource, and porn doesn't seem as appealing now that I know the facts about dopamine levels and porn-induced depression.

    I think NoFap is an important movement, and maybe in ten or twenty years it will be commonly accepted that high speed internet porn is generally a bad thing for the human brain. Who knows, right?

    :cool:
     
    Last edited: Nov 1, 2014
  2. PornKillsLove

    PornKillsLove Fapstronaut

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    This could be the drink, yes. Happens on some people. I know for one that it never affected me but drinking too much can delay my ejaculation a lot. On the opposite, other people might reach orgasm too soon after a few drinks. These are common alcohol-related side effects.

    About your ED fears, I suggest you renew the experience when completly (or relatively ;)) sober... that way you can be sure.
     
  3. napionder

    napionder Fapstronaut

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    It could be a number of things: the alcohol, the nerves because it was your first time or it could be related to pmo. I don't have ED, but from what I've heard people that do have it, in some cases can still get an erection. They get intimate with a girl (like kissing), this results in erection, but then when it comes to actual sex they can't keep it up, because that's the part where there brain is wired to porn images.

    No matter what the cause is, doing nofap will still do you good!
     
  4. Jigaloo

    Jigaloo Fapstronaut

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    I also believe the alcohol could be the problem in your case. Here is a link in the matter: http://www.sharecare.com/health/alcohol-and-health/alcohol-affect-ability-have-erection

    However, since it was your first sexual experience, you'll need a few tests to see if your erections are fine or not. I never thought I had ED until I tried to have sex with my girlfriend... but after a few failures, I knew things were not working at all so Nofap became unevitable.

    If you want to try the challenge, make sure you give 150% efforts to it! It can only do good.
     
  5. Aviator

    Aviator Fapstronaut

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    I think it's -mostly- that it was your 1st time, maybe talk to the girl about it, if she is a good girl she will understand and would help you out lol, good luck
     
  6. tmonk

    tmonk Fapstronaut

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    Doing well so far. In fact, its been too easy, I haven't even had to try yet.

    I don't know if this because I have simply made up my mind completely on why I want to give up porn, so that I can just completely and automatically ignore any cravings, but seriously, its been as easy as pie so far.:D
     
  7. tmonk

    tmonk Fapstronaut

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    Well, that glorious optimism is gone now. Relapsed again, blah blah, blah blah blah, etc etc.

    Im mainly doing this just because porn might have f**ked up my erections, so want to make sure I have my mojo when i bring a girl home in future.

    Also, the usual stuff, im at uni so should be meetin girls and not relying on porn to get me off.

    90 days is gonna be hard, i know, cus every time i got to 1-2 weeks in the past my brain tells me to give up NoFAP and convinces me i dont need it.

    But if i wasnt addicted, it would be easy to do this challenge.
     
  8. goa

    goa Fapstronaut

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    One thing that might really help is to visualise what your life would be like if you didn't have porn in your life. What would you like to change?

    Hold that vision firmly as you start to move forward. It will help get you through. Simple avoidance of PMO isn't going to be enough to overcome it.
     
  9. able2c

    able2c New Fapstronaut

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    I agree that hardcore pornography should be banned from the internet because it does cause a lot of problems and adds to many misconceptions about healthy sex.

    From my own experience, sex while drunk does often cause temporary ED. To much mastrubation also causes temporary ED. Put the two together and you are left with a leaky tube tire. Not much good for anything.
     
  10. tmonk

    tmonk Fapstronaut

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    Have just made it impossible to look at pornsites. Blocked all porn on my laptop and iphone, and gave my passwords to a relative in an email (which i have now deleted). I told them it was to give up online gaming, and for them not to give the passwords back till next July.

    The only way for me to watch porn is Youtube, and yes i know there is some kinky stuff on there, but its not on the same level as proper porn sites, so this is a huge step towards shaking it off.

    SORTED!!!!:D
     
    Last edited: Nov 20, 2014
  11. tmonk

    tmonk Fapstronaut

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    Have changed the goal to 90days without porn, I am allowing myself to masturbate. In the TED talk, 'the great porn experiment', the expert pretty much says that masturbation doesnt matter, only porn. Bit controversial around here I know, but I think the porn is the only thing that needs to go. ;)
     
  12. IGY

    IGY Guest

    You can reach the goal in the way you have said, but it is a lot harder, takes longer and the risk of lapsing into porn is greatly increased. So a reboot is possible while masturbating but improbable. But it's your call ;)
     
  13. tmonk

    tmonk Fapstronaut

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    On that note, IGY, i will try and greatly limit my masturbation, its just that I wont count myself as failing the challenge if I do. I guess masturbation sets off the parts of the brain that we are trying to keep inactive in order to reboot, so I will aim to not masturbate at all.
     

  14. For me, the addiction took me to porn or to masturbation or to prostitutes or to dating women, there was no difference.

    The real fact is I wanted to distract myself, I wanted to fill the "hole" in my soul with orgasms. That's it. Orgasm is the drug, and being a doubtful person is the problem. Solve the problem, and you don't need the drug anymore.

    Therefore, I chose to abstain from everything.

    The way out is to be a balanced and self-assured person, to go towards life, to have goals, to do the things you want, to have a pleasant and fulfilling life.
     
  15. Ghost.

    Ghost. Fapstronaut

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    Classic whisky dink.
     
  16. tmonk

    tmonk Fapstronaut

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    Update: Am going to restart. I didn't look at porn for 11 days; I can't because I have a filter on my computer. But I have been fapping like crazy. 2-3 times a day, and some quite intense fantasies have been coming into my head while fapping.

    When I reached 13 days with no PMO in the past, I felt something. I felt like I had more energy, I felt a bit pent up, and I was more masculine around women (I think).

    Quitting porn on its own, I have literally felt nothing at all in terms of change. I have not missed it, but I think the masterbating is still flooding my brain with dopamine like porn does, so no progress is being made.

    Therefore, I am setting myself the monumental challenge of going 100 days without porn or masterbation. (however, sex with a real girl is not something I can really turn down.) I know this is going to be really hard, and im skeptical that I can do it, going on past experience, but I will give it my all.