[18/M]
At midnight I start my 90 day NoFap reboot. I have abstained from porn for over two weeks but have been unable to quit masturbation with fantasy and erotica. For me, masturbation has become a release from the stresses of everyday life and has caused me to become incapable of addressing the problems in my life in a constructive way. Unfortunately this resulted in me being dumped by my girlfriend of 4 years and likely screwing up my A-levels due to being unable to overcome complacency and procrastination, not due to pornography addiction nor addiction to masturbation itself, but from training my brain from the age of 12 to ignore problems in life and instead focus on instant gratification. This has led to me being unable to achieve my potential and failing in almost every regard. I have become tired of living an unfulfilling life and have decided now is the time to take action.
Despite screwing up my Alevels, I still have an unconditional offer at my dream university which I start in mid-September, in 90 days time. This is my second chance. In order to make a success of this second chance, I must make the necessary changes right now. Pornography has resulted in the questioning of my own sexuality alongside the adoption of fetishes which I find rather destructive (cuckolding, humiliation, MMF threesomes, submission). I may never be able to rid myself of these desires and fetishises but I can develop strong self control to be able to look at them objectively and then dismiss them as the lunacy that they are. Pornography has also had many more incredibly negative impacts on my life, such as the objectification of women, overly high standards, difficulty having orgasms through any stimulation other than my own hand (which makes sex disappointing for both involved), as well as insecurity in my penis size (which in reality is actually averaged sized). By rebooting now I hope to be able to focus better on my education, find motivation to follow my passions and work on my hobbies and eventually find love again.
When relapsing after 2 weeks of NoFap last week, I experienced a severe pain after orgasm. This was the indication to me that enough was enough and that it was time to put a stop to this destructive habit once and for all. It was the wake up call that NoFap must be taken seriously and committed to 100%. This post, I hope, will hold me to account and help me to get through the most difficult moments that will surely come with a 90 day reboot. By having this written down and here for anyone to see, it will hopefully give me the motivation to not give in to urges, fantasies and desires but to instead ignore them and continue with something much more productive and worthwhile.
In 90 days, I will be able to return to this post victorious and hopeful for the future and a much better person than the one writing this post right now. That brings me peace and happiness within myself.
Signing out,
R.S
At midnight I start my 90 day NoFap reboot. I have abstained from porn for over two weeks but have been unable to quit masturbation with fantasy and erotica. For me, masturbation has become a release from the stresses of everyday life and has caused me to become incapable of addressing the problems in my life in a constructive way. Unfortunately this resulted in me being dumped by my girlfriend of 4 years and likely screwing up my A-levels due to being unable to overcome complacency and procrastination, not due to pornography addiction nor addiction to masturbation itself, but from training my brain from the age of 12 to ignore problems in life and instead focus on instant gratification. This has led to me being unable to achieve my potential and failing in almost every regard. I have become tired of living an unfulfilling life and have decided now is the time to take action.
Despite screwing up my Alevels, I still have an unconditional offer at my dream university which I start in mid-September, in 90 days time. This is my second chance. In order to make a success of this second chance, I must make the necessary changes right now. Pornography has resulted in the questioning of my own sexuality alongside the adoption of fetishes which I find rather destructive (cuckolding, humiliation, MMF threesomes, submission). I may never be able to rid myself of these desires and fetishises but I can develop strong self control to be able to look at them objectively and then dismiss them as the lunacy that they are. Pornography has also had many more incredibly negative impacts on my life, such as the objectification of women, overly high standards, difficulty having orgasms through any stimulation other than my own hand (which makes sex disappointing for both involved), as well as insecurity in my penis size (which in reality is actually averaged sized). By rebooting now I hope to be able to focus better on my education, find motivation to follow my passions and work on my hobbies and eventually find love again.
When relapsing after 2 weeks of NoFap last week, I experienced a severe pain after orgasm. This was the indication to me that enough was enough and that it was time to put a stop to this destructive habit once and for all. It was the wake up call that NoFap must be taken seriously and committed to 100%. This post, I hope, will hold me to account and help me to get through the most difficult moments that will surely come with a 90 day reboot. By having this written down and here for anyone to see, it will hopefully give me the motivation to not give in to urges, fantasies and desires but to instead ignore them and continue with something much more productive and worthwhile.
In 90 days, I will be able to return to this post victorious and hopeful for the future and a much better person than the one writing this post right now. That brings me peace and happiness within myself.
Signing out,
R.S