90 days free of porn

I've now managed to go 90 days without viewing any porn! Hell yea. Never in a million years did I think I'd get to 90 days, but shit I've managed!

Now that I've gone 90 days of no pornography I want to see if I can go 90 days of hard-mode. My views toward women and sex are pretty grossly warped on a conscious and subconscious level and I really want to continue to change this.

One thing that's been holding me back is the concept that I keep sex as an option in my mind. I tell myself, if and when an opportunity arrises take it. I am after all still a virgin and losing my virginity is something I'd very much like to do at the getting late age of 19.

However, this possibility undermines the whole process really. It makes me want, crave, and lust within the confines of my own dome.

One thing that's kind of funny, is that when I decided to attempt committing to hardmode sometime last week my interactions with women were more comfortable, natural, and fun and engaging. Without the driving force of, "i want sex. how can I have sex. Will she have sex." shit happening, I was able to be fully present, listen to her as a human, and by virtue of that be more absorbing in conversation.

One thing I really like, I got this from a youtube channel, shogo Garcia and Golden Jacket Luke, is that sex isn't just penetration. It's the moment you meet eyes and the whole unfolding story after that point. It's the laughs, interactions, everything.

I've been kind of going about with this approach now. When I talk to a girl we meet at the eyes, I give her my full attention, am honest, take down my walls, and just be nothing more than what I am.

Soooooooo, my point of this is that, now that I've hit 90 days, I need to start enacting change in the world beyond the scope of my own head. I need to interact more fully, remove sex as an option, and nurture my mind and body back into a natural outlook of the world.

Though I intellectually understand my shortcomings, it's one thing to know them and another thing to live them.

But fuck yes!!! 90 days of no porn! Took me about 2 years, but I've finally gotten here!

Hardmode?! let's go

 

thanks for the sound advice man

 

cheers man!