A 90 days No PMO success story (fetish p use)

Hi there! Peace.

This is my first 90 day no PMO streak, and definitely the longest time I've gone without MO since I was 16. The P I was addicted at that time has been erotic literature of different fetishes. I did go on a no-P streak of around 18 months in my early 20's, and a no-MO streak of at least 3 months then. It came back with a vengeance, starting with the same erotic literature, but then develop into fetish images and art, then intensified to images and fetish-but-not-fully-pornographic videos during 2020 before I threw it all out at the beginning of June 2022. May 2022 there were periods where I was PMOing 3x a night. The first entry of my Journal catches you up to speed on my journey before joining the forum in August.

My goal is sexual integrity from a Christian perspective as a single male. My ultimate goal is to get to a point where I'm getting nocturnal emissions again, although at 30 I might be too old for that.

These are how I got to this 90 day success:

• Before nofap, deleted stories and closed down accounts where I was getting back to fetish materials.
• In the later half of the journey, I did install OpenDNS (how to) on my own network and used the low P filter and some related domains (journal).
• Much of my P use was going to bed and after waking up. Moving my phone to outside the bedroom greatly helped.
• Getting up when awake.
• Getting a daily exercise routine sorted. Mine was at least 30 minutes a day either walk/run, pool swimming or Hiit/Hirt/Plyo.
• I've been more choiceful in what podcasts I listen to (journal)
  
• I practice Christian Mindfulness to mitigate fetish thoughts. (journal)
• Reading and understanding more extreme fetishes and how they were overcome by others on this forum. Three Christian journals stand out: Roady (sissy-P, Autogynephilia), GodsDaughter (fetish development caused by trauma) and XandeXIV (self-bondage, his needs analysis is very good).
• Belief in a God who truly loves me (testimony) & getting experiences of that love after confessing my sins to him. Belief in a higher power does help.
  
• Asking a long time friend to be counselor for the journey so far (who knows the details), and admitting these failings to trusted friends (they do think it's vanilla P not fetish stuff).
• I haven't spoken about this on my journal, as this has been unrelated to my journey so far, but cutting down on sugar and Cooking for myself with fresh produce might have had an impact (but I've been doing this since 2019 even when I was Fapping)

Comparing myself now to what I was back in May:

• The world seems more brighter.
• I'm less anxious and a more calming personality (journal).
• I've lost around 4-5 kg
• Since day 30 my morning woods have more girth, although for me that has caused some body image issues (journal)

What I still have problems with:

• Fetish thoughts are still present and become an internal mind problem in my life at times (see first journal entry to find those fetishes)
• I haven't done my own needs analysis for why I jumped into certain fetishes when I was 16. I believe I'm going to need to go to a psychologist for that part of my story.
• I miss the fetish stories sometimes. If I didn't make the decision to begin No-P back in June, I would be starting to deconstruct my faith right now, with the aim to get involved in these fetishes in real life.
• In my first post I identified as a "30yo ? Man (I believe P has warped my sexual orientation identity, believe I'm straight but hang out with mostly other men)". I'm still not sure of my sexual orientation, other than I'm demiromantic. I do like the idea of being asexual, and a lot of what are signs of asexuality do align to how I think about sex and sexuality. But not sure if that's just me wanting to be celibate for now. Also, there are times of fleeting SSA in my life, which may indicate that I'm bi. I have been dating a girl for a couple of weeks (3 dates).

Hopefully this is encouraging. I'll post in my journal what the next 90 days might look like.