a bit of a hypocrite

J

jacob overcoming

Fapstronaut
hey guys my names jake; im a case worker, and i play a coaching role in the lives of a lot of other people. i decided to use this site because pmo has been a crippling force and a constant source of guilt as well as an abuse of my time since i was a preteen. it has also made me question the positive changes i regularly help others make as i feel disqualified because of this terrible issue. the problem is i never know whether i should tell people i look up to or people that look up to me. Even worse, the one person who looks up to me the most atm is my wonderful wife; i need to make these changes for her. She is not aware of my habit and because of her insecurities i fear ever telling her lest i break her heart to bits. i just need to put pmo to bed for good. appreciate your love n support
 
Welcome to NoFap where you are amongst friends who are here to encourage you and not judge you.

What are your current strategies for combating the enemy called PMO?
 
thanks DJ, I've come to the conclusion just recently that I'm never doing it again. It's not that I usually intend to, but I don't think my resolve has ever been solid enough to weather the storms. When thoughts come I've determined not to fight them but to dismiss them. Yesterday before I joined this page was the last time I slipped up. I've been watching videos of guys that went 30, 90, 500 days without PMO and the amazing difference it has made in their lives and relations. It stirred me up with exhilaration and made me eager to do the same. I've gone for periods of time without it before but nothing has ever stuck; I believe having a community around me to share with, even anonymously, will be profoundly helpful. There's really nobody else in my life that I feel safe to completely open myself up to.
 
Hi Jacob, too am married but I didn't have the strength/courage to tell my wife about my PMO. It was too late as she found it on my phone. This has happened before and now I have lost her trust completely. I massively regret not being honest with her. it has caused her imenense pain as she suffers with body dismorphia but the fact I lied to her made it so much worse. I am new to this community too and am embarking on the 90 Day reboot. I no longer want to cause my wife and family pain. I wish you all the best with your journey to a life without porn
 
Hey bro congrats on your new start. Im learning to see it this way: im already past porn because ive made the decision that im done. This is my resolve and i want to stay as public here as i can because this place and these groups keep me excited and mindful of this change. Im not gonna keep trying to convince myself, i wont be doubleminded, the decision for me is made with finality
 
I want to be a man confident in every part of my life, somebody others can depend on, somebody transparent, somebody with no chains, somebody who loves fully, somebody committed. I want to take all of the passion that i was giving to this monstrosity and redirect it toward my faith in God, my relationship with my wife and love for my neighbour
 
I couldn't agree more. I feel the same and am resolved to bettering myself. I have returned to church as I have not been living as a true Christian. My wife deserves a man of integrity, honesty and commitment ( which I have not been) and I revisit my wedding vows each day to remind myself what I need to do. I pray everyday for the strength and capacity to change what can be changed.
 
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