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A Letter From Former Porn Star

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by ecd, Aug 5, 2021.

  1. Aram124

    Aram124 Fapstronaut

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    Porn is shit and I want kill porn I am happy I'm at 2 weeks I'm never going back
     
    Rostrock47, ANewFocus, ermia and 2 others like this.
  2. Ekhangel

    Ekhangel Fapstronaut

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    The key statement of mine I'll reiterate to answer your remarks is: "That's probably because the vast majority of porn in circulation is semi-professional at most". This is not to say that all porn is lame and made with the participation of random sluts - no. But vast majority is, and has nothing to do with the sufferings of the poor women in the industry that people tend to dramatize so much about.

    We need to be specific here about what we understand behind the term "porn industry". I define it as the world's whole porn in circulation, even the crap that promiscuous attention whores post on Reddit, amateur porn etc. Some, however, may define it much more narrowly to include only strictly professional productions shot in studios by directors. In the latter case the "abuse rate" will probably be higher. But this latter portion of the industry is far smaller than the former, I believe! And no, I don't have statistics to back this really, but it seems natural that those "products for the masses" conceived as a means of earning quick advertisement money would be more popular than the professional, paid stuff. Think of Youtube and all those lame reviewers, unboxers, video bloggers and all that versus professional content published by big media companies.
     
    Meshuga likes this.
  3. Lumkalak

    Lumkalak Fapstronaut

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    Thanks @Meshuga, interesting info!

    Puts many things into different perspective.

    Nevertheless, still feel petty for her. Useless and lousy lifestory. And I feel petty for her victims. Especially the kids...

    Victims or sluts? I agree with you: maybe both (excluding the human trafficking victims, of course). But still, I feel petty for them.

    Some regard them as "stars", but it's very lousy and miserable life they're living, even if they didn't realize it themselves.

    There's one quote that really applies here IMO (although it gets a bit lost in the translation:
    "Nobody is resbonsible alone. But everybody is responsible for themselves."
     
    Meshuga and AmazingBulk like this.
  4. I think sometimes we tend to forget that we’re not much different from the actors and actresses in the P industry. The only thing that really separates our struggle is which side of the screen we’re on. I’d suggest showing a little empathy even for people you may not think deserve it.
     
    Raahvi, ANewFocus, kumarach and 3 others like this.
  5. Me too. I wish porn never existed.
     
    Ghost79 and ecd like this.
  6. ecd

    ecd Fapstronaut

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    I hear your opinion. But I'm more interested in big picture here rather than digging the words of one author.
    Frankly when someone says that sex workers, men & women, are hypersexual (words like pervert for men, person for women, etc.), I'm thinking porn customers like us are also hypersexual with only difference that we are not in dire need of money & hence didn't enter sex business, otherwise we are no different than them mental state wise. Of-course their life circumstances took them that path & my life circumstances took me to software programming path (even if I didn't really want this), but that doesn't give me any right to malign their life choices when at the same time ENJOYING THIER SERVICE. I would rather like customers/viewers to say thanks for your service & shut up their mouth. At-least they are not cheating public like politicians & big business owners cheat in their "hidden" ways.

    And obviously once you enter a profession its not easy to change the profession. I myself is trying to shift from software programmer to something else, but it's not that easy, unless you are a rich guy.
    If my brother or sister is hypersexual, I don't call them pervert or person, I take them to a doctor. I don't call myself a person, I call myself an addict. Why the bias against porn actresses then?

    Further it's a well known fact that poverty gives rise to various social issues like crime & prostitution to name a few. Young men become criminals even if they were not naturally that way in childhood. And young women sell sex even if they were not hypersexual by nature.
    And lastly re-emphasizing the fact that customers like us are the pillar of any business. As long as there will be demand there will be supply. The moment demands goes down the business goes bankrupt. So I don't see customers as some 'pure' people & suppliers as some 'malignant' people. Both are parts of same coin.

    It's true that I quit porn because of my health issues by addiction, but even before that I felt guilt & sympathy towards porn actresses when I started hearing such stories many years ago.
    So my friend we can spend rest of life pointing the finger at the world & justify our own actions. Or see the big picture.
     
  7. ecd

    ecd Fapstronaut

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    <Pls read my previous reply to @Meshuga>
     
  8. ecd

    ecd Fapstronaut

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    I understand your point. I still hope people to have sympathy for all those actresses whose services we enjoyed.
    It's just like those discussions whether fish feel pain or not out of water when caught by fishermen, because they have different brain systems, etc. I would say don't examine too much on who is having how much pain, before or after entering porn business. I just don't want my younger brothers or sons to repeat my 'sin' of 'lust' by watching other nude women having sex on camera. Yes these religious terms 'sin' or 'vice' sound stereotype but I think it was just the language of those ages, in the end giving simple message that these actions harm everyone in many complex ways, both the supplier & the consumer.

    <Also read my previous reply to Meshuga; A Letter From Former Porn Star>
     
    Last edited: Aug 7, 2021
  9. Inloverber

    Inloverber Fapstronaut

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    That's one heavy letter. If you could can other means of making money then leave the porn industry. It is destroying you the whole of you, your soul.

    I just dont get what is the benefit of initiating this kind of industry beyond money.
     
    ecd likes this.
  10. Ekhangel

    Ekhangel Fapstronaut

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    Well, me neither! But I’ll always emphasise the fact that the abuse stories are but a very marginal part of the “porn market” (not to say “industry”) picture to point people’s attention to the fact that promiscuity among our population is a perfectly conscious choice, not based on any abuse, threats, intoxication, poverty etc. Unless we maybe mean prostitutes or actually “professional” porn stars (a definite minority of porn performers IMHO), where the proportion of people coming from difficult backgrounds is probably high. And those perfectly conscious everyday choices are a far greater problem than those abuse or trafficking cases I believe.

    It’s sort of like focusing merely on the German victims of the Nazi regime, ignoring altogether the fact that the regime was in fact widely popular among the Germans in the period of let’s say 1936-1943. The problem of the victims is important, but the problem of the popular support is much more important and is the key to understanding why some things are actually happening.
     
  11. Quezatolah

    Quezatolah Fapstronaut

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    RIP to her and all porn actors and actresses who suffered and died as a result of the abuse inflicted on them by the porn industry.

    I read the letter and this whole thread, I'm not quitting for anyone but myself and the people I care about.

    I also believe in personal responsibility, I didn't agree with the last part of her message appearing like a damsel in distress expecting a white knight or captain save-a-hoe to show up and rescue them.

    Not taking any ownership was the wrong conclusion to this letter imo, it would be like me expecting all porn to magically disappear, for all half naked women walking the streets from my house to get properly dressed etc, she made herself powerless and a helpless victim in that letter.

    Don't expect the world to change, fuck the world, focus on you, with that said, I do have empathy for them and I hope they find their way one day.
     
    Last edited: Aug 7, 2021
    HelperX and Meshuga like this.
  12. Meshuga

    Meshuga Fapstronaut

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    I hear you both, @ecd and @Ekhangel .

    On one hand, sure, the "industry" has changed, the content has changed, and those who are producing pornographic content have changed. Whether it's "amateurs" (a lot of the work published as amateur isn't) posting their sex tapes or InstaTHOTS, or the full LA produced films, it does seem like performers are treated better than the horror story Lubben presents. I've seen and heard stuff that suggests performers aren't as into it as the fantasy sells it. I've heard a lot of Eastern European girls clock in for cam work, pressured into it because they look appealing to us relatively wealthy Westerners and bring in decent money for their acting gig. But for the most part it's voluntary. Do we have the right to smear them, though? Because like ecd says, they did it but we watched, and we sure as hell punched the hell out of that monkey when we did it. I do disagree with the claim we are equal participants. I think there's a difference in degree between watching and actually performing and posting, but hey. He who is without sin (John 8:3-7), right?

    If I'm with anyone, though, it's @Quezatolah . Liar or not, Lubben had one screwed up life and definitely earned our pity, but she didn't have a right to ask anyone to save her. Neither did she have a right to blame the P viewing public for her circumstances. Likewise, we don't have the right to blame "sluts" (what is a "person" anyway?), or high speed Internet, or "society" or anything like that. I have adhd, I could blame that, but I won't. We made choices. We are dealing with the consequences of some of those choices, and today, with the help of folks like Gary Wilson (RIP) and Alexander Rhodes and each other, we can make different choices that will serve us better. That's about the best we can do in anything.
     
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  13. Glossi3r

    Glossi3r Fapstronaut

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    Coercive sex isn’t consensual, money is coercive
     
    ecd likes this.
  14. Ekhangel

    Ekhangel Fapstronaut

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    Not necessarily equal participants, but it is us who are fuelling the industry. Without us there would be no pornography (ever heard rock stars declaring their usual "I'm nothing without my fans" cliche line?). And that was one of the major reasons why I decided to quit this world for good. I just didn't want to have anything to do with it, because it was obviously shameful. EVERY "porn star" is someone's daughter, think about it. With every new visit to a porn site we are making our contribution to the miserable condition of humanity (in the sexual sphere) of today.
     
  15. ermia

    ermia Fapstronaut

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    oh come on !
    women are very Emotional and often they have been sex by a perfect man not any man!!
    this is clear!!
    we injured from Porn and we have spend costs.
    when a women Naked for someone she does not love, the woman dies emotionally and self confidence.
     
  16. Rostrock47

    Rostrock47 Fapstronaut

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    Some of them were forced to do it so don't talk like that..
     
    ecd and ermia like this.
  17. Ghost79

    Ghost79 Fapstronaut

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    I don't know what kind of porn you people are watching but there is enough content there where people do it with there partner and put it online.
     
  18. kumarach

    kumarach Fapstronaut


    i did know that porn industry is dark and mean but this article really blew me away.another reason to keep going on this streak,porn industry is literally LEGAL HUMAN ABUSE
     
    ANewFocus and ecd like this.
  19. kumarach

    kumarach Fapstronaut

    DON'T BE SO MEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNN.....................
     
  20. kumarach

    kumarach Fapstronaut

    ANIMATED P IS EVEN MORE DEADLY
     

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