A new self for a new me

Hello everyone

I will be honest. For about a year or two I ve been trying to quit PMO. For several months my attempts were unsuccessfull. Day 0: try to quit PMO, day 1: retry, Day: a new day 0, a new day 1, etc. Everytime I was bored or stressed, I used to switch my pc on. Everytime I used to switch my pc on, I used to surf the web. Finally, I used to set my browset to incognito mode and download some porn to satisfy myself. This used to happen everyday. For a great period of time. My school performance is a lot lower than it used to be years ago. My memory sucks, my learning ability is reduced and my social life is threatned. But... I can't say that my porn addiction - actually, my PMO addiction - is the source of all my problems altogether. I'd rather say that I started PMO to reliefe myself from the pressure of everyday, ordinary life and the PMO upgraded itself to an addiction that made my performances a lot worse. I believe that trying to quit only PMO itself is not gonna solve all of your problems and it is not gonna be as easy as trying to face both PMO and all your personal matters. I say that because I experienced this test. First, I realised those negative things that affected my performance and then I decided to face them - including my attempt of quitting PMO. It sounds tough, but it's much easier that trying to get yourself out of PMO, because you keep yourself busy by trying to improve. I deleted my porn collection, I never downloaded porn again and I never masturbated in twelve days. This, I believe, is a triumph, if one considers that I used to watch porn everyday (even in mornings) and used to masturbate 3 times a day. Then, I decided to face my fears and make a better me. I started jogging again and studying. So far, so good. I m very positive. My goal is to never watch porn again. I am decided. Because, you know, I m on an edge. If I don't improve myself, I m gonna fall off the cliff. I hope I inspired some people who are gonna read this thread. Believe me. All it needs is courage, keeping yourself always busy and be determined. The last but not least is desicive. No one quits smoking without deciding first. You have to really decide that once you re in the wagon there's no going back. Once - day 5, if I remember well - I almost relapsed. I downloaded a porn film with my favorite actress - I remember the excitement, because it was a new film of her - and I wanted just to watch it. No MO... when the download was completed, I opened the file, but on secong 6 I closed the media player and erased the file. The actress didn't even start talking. I didn't even think of downloading porn ever since. And I m happy. I hope this piece of experience and advice helps some of you, fellow "fapstronauts". Such a funny word, don't you think. The guy that came up with that has a good sense of humor. Keep it up.

 

Oh, and by the way, I'm not 100 % better, but my body feels better, my school performance is a little better and the jogging really helps me both mentally and physically. Another secret: people, it takes time. You have to be really strong and reaaaaally patient. That's all for today. Next post on day 20 - hopefully. I m pretty busy improving myself, so everyday activity in the web will affect me negatively.

I do not want to use this thread as a means of personal discussion ot company. I just hope to inspire some people that are trying yo be the best they can be.

 

Well, still the same advice. Once you really decide to quit it, it's past. Day 18 and still haven't had the need to watch porn. I feel alive and socially accepted again. I don't feel socially awkward anymore and I m commited to my tasks and to the people I love and care for the most. If it's hard for others to face the problem by thinking the consequences, try to imagine how your life will be, once you get rid of this nasty, unnatural habit.