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A new start with a better player

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by Deleted Account, Dec 4, 2019.

  1. 5 years ago I met this girl and she became my first girlfriend. I was naive & young because at the time I wasn’t exposed or cared to know about becoming intimate with someone. & yes I would watch P & MO before I met her but not as often a couple times a week or few times a month, sometimes once a month & I did have episodes where it would be 3 times a day Maybe a couple times a week but they wouldn’t happen often, I’d have to be extremely bored and alone. I would usually hook up if an opportunity arose. But back to my first girlfriend, I went into that relationship in the best shape of my life, I couldn’t even remember the last time I pmo when I met her at the time. But she was not what I thought & seeing as to how this was my first intimate relationship, it was not the best. See, I thought wow in the beginning all the sex was great, I had thought it was normal almost 12-14 times a week. I was naive and couldn’t say no. 4 months into the relationship She revealed to me she had a P blog. We dealt with it and we kept it moving, I never realized this would impact me in the long run. She resented me for telling her I didn’t like her P Blog but all that did was make her want more of me and lust took over trust for her. Fast forward towards our last year together, I was tired and exhausted of all the demanding sex and she blew up how she stopped her blog because of me and how I wasn’t giving it to her as often etc etc It was the beginning of the end. She eventually cheated and found a new source, that only made me realize that she was the addict and as much as I tried During the relationship, she couldn’t let go of the sex & pmo. Once our relationship ended without realizing it, the pmo that she brought to the relationship instilled in me. The first month after being broken up I would pmo 2-3 times a day, I started feeling weak, I developed a cyst in my leg, acne all over my back, my gym workouts decreased. But I would still workout and continued to live an active lifestyle but not the one I originally had. Because I would somewhat maintain active and still pmo I was constantly drained, mentally emotionally I kept falling and not realizing it because I didn’t care, I felt I would be single for years. After the first month I would still pmo Almost on occasion 2-3 times a day. Then enter New Player, I met her through sport and I’ve known her for a couple years and we hit it off but pmo was still there. Every time we would hook up especially in the beginning I would DE and then it became ED. I was shocked surprise my new girl was smoking hot, she had an amazing personality strong character and very sound with a good head on her shoulders so I couldn’t believe what was happening to me. She felt she wasn’t sufficient enough or she was inadequate and I kept trying thinking it’ll go away while my pmo wouldn’t. Eventually I told my new girl and she was very understanding about it she said ok told me to heal myself And she wouldn’t think much of it and said she was ok with doing a sex fast too She told me she never watches P and rarely M , we are still hanging out doing all the cute couple shit lol I’m currently on day 4 of my 40 day pmo-sex fast and after day 40 I hope to never PM again! I’ve been reading a lot more and am trying to get back to my original fitness routine. I’m so happy I told my new girl and she’s been great about. I’m doing this for myself! Pmo has hurt me before and I don’t want it to hurt anyone else especially those around me and those I care about. I wish everyone on here the best.
     

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