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A year since I have had sex

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by seth, Sep 4, 2016.

  1. seth

    seth Fapstronaut

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    I keep a line a day journal, in which I write a few sentences everyday for five years. I'm almost 2 years in. Anyway, I've gone on a few dates in the past year, but the last time I had sex was the end of August 2015.

    It kind of stung re-reading that, because I couldn't believe that was a year ago, and I couldn't believe that nothing has worked out since.

    But two weeks ago I added a few dating apps to my phone, and I've started a lot of conversations. I got a few phone numbers so far, and I have plans to meet two of them.

    And I'm not even sure what I want out of this. Do I just want sex? Do I want a relationship? I'm kind of going to figure it out as I go. I guess I just want some intimacy, whether that's emotional, physical, or as simple as going on a date. We'll see how it goes!
     
    Tommy_0113 likes this.
  2. Krutonpalmer3

    Krutonpalmer3 Fapstronaut

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    It's ok man you'll figure out what you want when you get there.
     
  3. Son_of_Iroquois

    Son_of_Iroquois Fapstronaut

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    It's simple: you want sex and an emotional connection with a beautiful women. Where you take it beyond that is up to you.
     
    Washed-Up likes this.
  4. seth

    seth Fapstronaut

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    Go figure, I just got laid yesterday lol
     
  5. Mr. Mind Right

    Mr. Mind Right Fapstronaut

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    I haven't had sex in 8 years
     
    D . J . and John Nixon like this.
  6. Tommy_0113

    Tommy_0113 Fapstronaut

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    I'll be a year without sex in November. It's upsetting. I've had two times in the last year where a girl has literally said 'I want you to fuck me' and I couldn't get hard because of PIED...
     
    D . J . likes this.
  7. John Nixon

    John Nixon Fapstronaut

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    You need a complete reboot Tommy. It's great you have been porn free for 87 days. Try to avoid fapping and definately do not edge. Edging without O can actually be worse than Fapping to O. The longer someone spends masturbating in one session the more dopamine sex chemicals are released in the brain. A complete reboot can last up to 120 days and it has to be hard mode if you want to benefit from a full reboot.
     
    D . J . likes this.
  8. Andrew0268

    Andrew0268 Fapstronaut

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    congrats @seth

    And to all the other guys in dry spells.... I've been through many. Don't focus on what you don't have. Focus on living a good life. Learn to be positive, get around other men, find a way to be happy. It can be really hard, I struggled with consistent lowness for years, and maybe still will, but you need to fix your life. Some of you guys will need a major physical, mental, or spiritual revolution. Maybe you'll need all 3, but you gotta do it. There's a pretty woman who wants the best you.
     
    seth, D . J . and Mr. Mind Right like this.
  9. Tommy_0113

    Tommy_0113 Fapstronaut

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    yes I'm not fapping and not edging. Only in the mornings with morning wood I might touch my boxers briefly. But no stroking the cock itself. My biggest issue is Porn subs. I can't avoid looking at them.
     
  10. D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

    You can determine how long you look at PSUBS. Guard your eyes, when/if you see a PSUB turn away!
     
    Tommy_0113 likes this.
  11. Xwin

    Xwin Fapstronaut

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    This made my day. Thanks for sharing. I was secretly rooting for you, dude!

    Things happen when you put your mind to it.
     
    seth likes this.
  12. Washed-Up

    Washed-Up Fapstronaut

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    Been 3 weeks short of 10 years for me. And only achieved intercourse once in the last 16 years because of my stupid porn addiction. My short-lived 3 month relationship happening exactly 10 years ago right now wasn't long enuff to get me off the PMO cycle to help the PIED.

    The words that hurt me the most was, while pleasuring her orally, "make love to me". My stupid (at least to me) response was "I thought I was!".

    Believe me, that hurt-for the last 10 years. Shortly after that episode, she "had to decide" between me and her husband at the time (they had been estranged for almost a year-he started trying harder after finding out about me). She said she wasn't coming back (slight distance between us), but did, once, after I broke down after she told me that. It turned out to be the last time we were intimate and I managed to "go all the way".

    And that was it. She broke it off. I went into a deep depression but did nothing to help myself. I tried with a few other women but, after the last one shot me down so hard a couple of years ago with her actions after seemingly leading me on for months, I just gave up completely.

    At 50, I'm EXACTLY where I didn't want to be when I was younger. Alone and miserable. No pity due here. I made my bed.....!

    I just hope that someone reading this, that has a life ahead, of them kicks themselves HARD in the a$$ and does something about it!! NOW!!
     
    Mr. Mind Right and D . J . like this.
  13. seth

    seth Fapstronaut

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    @Washed-Up I appreciate you sharing that, but life doesn't end at 50. Live in the present. I just read 7 Habits of Highly Effective People and it talks about circle of concern and circle of influence. The past is in your circle of concern and not something you can influence.

    I'm 23 and taking your advice to heart!
     
    D . J . likes this.

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