Accountability for All

Day 41
Last night and earlier today I looked at P but didn't relapse. I wasted about 2 hours in total looking at that crap. I found myself getting bored with it all. But I need to stop going back to "make sure" I don't "miss" anything because there is nothing for me there. It's just lies and disappointments on that path. Plus I'm on 40+ days and I don't want to lose it.

In other news, I noticed a benefit of nofap. People are treating me better. I wonder if it's because I seem more confident or what but it feels good. I don't feel scared to speak up or anything like I used to. It's all up from hear I hope.

 

Well... I relapsed last night. However, I'm going to restart my counter, and try to go for 1.5 months no PMO. I'm not going to fall for the chaser effect, I'm gonna just continue what I've been doing.

 

Well I relapsed recently by prone and got caught not taking em so my mom is forcing me to take them even though I have told her they don't help and its just an industry.

 

Day 5

This is my first time writing here, I just register like 5 mins ago. Let's give it a try.

My last streak was 11-12 days and maybe was becuase my job demanded me for a week to wake up really really early, like at 4am (I used to wake up at 9 and go to sleep at 12-2am) but I didn't feel any rush of energy because I was kind of tired always. In day 13 I started to sleep normal again and even I relapsed I felt a huge amount of energy the next 3-5 days, every day I masturbated to be honest and I could feel how my energy was less and less everyday. after 5-6 fapping I decided that the energy I felt those days was incredible, maybe was placebo or maybe not (I don't think so) and maybe it wasn't even related to doing noFap, but having the possibility there made me start again, I want to feel that way again and that's my motivation. I also experimented other stuff like mental clarity, less stress, less anxiety and as I mentioned was great.

Today is my 5th day in my new streak, honestly I've been doing edging, I recognize I have a problem, I never thought fap was controlling me, but spending a day without fighting edging (and lossing) made me realize that I'm not controlling my life.

So starting today I decided to focus more on not even edging or visiting one of these places. I have really good friends to me there and is hard to think I could loose them, I'm a lonely person and talking with them sometimes helps I have faith this is better for me in the long road.

Tomorrow, day 6 my goal is not edge, not visit a page, not look for naked ladies in google, not even take a look at my pretty co-workers. If I'm not able to spend at least one day doing this, then I'm sure I have a worst problem than I think and will start talking about this with my psychologist.

Benefits so far:

1. Lots of more time
2. I can go to bed waay earlier (feels nice to sleep more)
3. I do feel like my mental clarity has improved a little
4. Feels good to do something for me
5. Anxiety and stress has reduced (this advantages are still present from my previous 10 days streak)

Important, I'm doing also other challenges to boost my benefits and gain some others. These challenges are:

1. Practice Wim Hof Method (8 day streak)
   1. Breathwork
   2. Cold showers
   3. Meditation
2. Stop playing too much videogames
3. Reducing caffeine (trying to move to decaf and then just water)
4. Follow a nutrition plan (like 4 months, lost 33lbs)
5. Meditate before going to bed
6. Keep a bullet journal
7. Started talking more with people that actually cares for me and reduce my interactions with my "friends" that actually are not making me feel better in any way.
8. Go to gym/swimming (honestly not going everyday but at least 2/3 times per week)

 

Day one down

 

Day nine things are looking a lot better than before

 

Day 17 done. Didn't P or M, but O'ed, so I reset my counter and keep a separate counter for myself. Ended my friendship with benefits, so this is like a new start for me.

 

Day 1
Day one finished successfully, im positive of my success, but i have to dedicate this win to my good friend he came over to my house and we spoke then he drove me to his place we watched a film and just talked so it kept me away from any and all types of relapsing and also kept my head clear of any weird thoughts, keeping a good mindset, feeling ready for tomorrow lets go !

 

I relapsed yesterday, so I'm starting from Day 0 again.

 

Day 2 down

 

How is that not a relapse?If you want to succeed in this you need to be honest with yourself.2 hours of watching is a lot

 

Day 10 of ninety. “I don’t know what’s going on, all I know is we have the right of way, THE RIGHT OF WAY!!!” “Please don’t continue sir!!” “Motor one moving” “Get to me, get to me, get to me. Somehow, someway, somehow. We got Orange County in the intersection”. - Jeremy Dewitte. I find his animated yelling motivational, somehow

 

Dont stress man, that relapse is just another step forward, now you know what kind of porn to avoid and what triggered you to relapse keep going you did well i only wish i could reach 9 days !

 

Day 1 complete.

 

Watched an interesting TED talk today about procrastination and the monkey mind. Reminded me a lot of the way I act when urges come. It was really helpful to remind myself that I’m in control and I just need to take it back to the rational side.

That’s day three for me. Keep fighting guys. We’ll make it out of this

 

I'm in, just in case I dont get notifications anyone got a snap?

 

So I relapsed again. I'm setting a quit date for April 1st. Until then I'm going to prepare by listening to hypnosis audio, learning how to block adult content on my phone, and coming up with activities to do when I get cravings. It might not be how most people on here do it, but I'm going to do it my way. After all, it's my addiction. I'll be back on this specific forum on April 1st! Stay safe guys, keep pushing forward, and good luck. Ttyl