Accountability for All

MY COMRADES, PLEASE TAKE A LOOK A THIS EPIC COURSE ABOUT QUITTING PORN: https://jkemezi.net/rewire-your-desire-daily-habits/#summary

I'll save some money to buy it, J.K is the best in the world at helping men quit porn, I'm sure his product is phenomenal!

 

It's a bit like an integer overflow, I became so upset that I don't want to PMO. In a sense, this recovery process is one of the few things I can confidently say I have control over so I'm not letting it go.

 

Before you dive in, have you personally verified his credentials?
Did you check his reputation elsewhere?
Are others saying that this course is beneficial? Are the people saying that legit, or are they sponsored?
Last thing you want to do in this process of recovery is to pay a large sum of money for what may amount to a scam.

 

Good to read that, my man! PMO is a slippery slope. Watch out for the unsuspecting urges. You need to anticipate them, as they can suddenly jump your back.

 

Day 60

The counter hit 60, but it still feels like yesterday when my GF found P on ny telephone and wanted to leave me. From that moment onward, I decided to change my life. Not for my GF, but because I couldn’t live seeing myself like this.

Fapping had become a way to relieve stress and tension, a drug when I was sad, angry or just bored. PMO was always around the corner and, unknowingly, recruited me for his band of slaves.

The past 60 days feel like a journey in which I had to make the first steps in battling a 23 year old addiction. And I realize it will take another 23 years to densensitise everything, but I endeavor to get my life back.

Work-out:
Went for a walk and did my dumbbell workout. Did 20 push ups. Intend to move my workout to the afternoon.

Netflix:
Watched a bit of Netflix, but was busy with other things. That said, I must actively prevent myself from finding different channels on which I consume televised content. For example, when my Netflix time is up, I'm not supposed to go to Amazon Prime or to Udemy.

Meditation:
I did 2 sessions and spent 25 minutes meditating.

Your Brain On Porn/Study:
In YBOP, the author speaks of Sensitized pathways of addicts. He speaks of pathways that if ‘fire together, they wire together’. E.g.: if you watch really disturbing shit, it will make you aroused. Or if you’re sad and you fap your sadness away, you're used to always grab the pee pee when the going gets tough. According to a study in the book where they compared this addiction to the pathways of alcohol abuse, it might take up to 20+ years to desensitize these pathways. So give yourself time.

Sleep:
Slept late, as I had to bring my GF back home. However, I feel great and finished my routine.

 

Nice work bro. Keep yourself busy.

 

Resetting my counter back to zero.

 

I've been watching his youtube videos and listening to his podcast (Porn Reboot) for the last two years, I`m 100% sure is not a scam.

I paid for one of his courses before and it was legendary.

 

Checkin in - I`m doing great!

Yesterday:
I woke up at 5:30 am, and followed my morning routine:

1. Breakfast.

2. Correct my posts on Journaly.

3. Study Japanese for one hour.

4. Study digital marketing.

5. Practice copywriting.

6. Exercise and take a cold shower.



And then I did some other tasks and had an English Class with my good friend Will. I'm very grateful for his help.



And then I just went to the shopping mall and worked on my side hustle. I was productive as hell today.



List of things I'm grateful for:

• I'm grateful that Robin created this amazing website, I love it!
• I'm grateful for my laptop.
• I'm grateful I'm studying Japanese every day. THAT'S THE DREAM!
• I'm grateful I have time and money.
• I'm grateful I bought an Anki deck from Refold.
• I'm grateful I watched the last Spiderman movie. One of the best movies ever made!

 

Day 51. Checking in.

 

Day 18. I had urges sneak up on me, but since I was about to leave the house to go out with a friend anyways I was able to bypass the urges. Recovery from the day 17 incident is underway.

 

Day 61

Had a sex dream and it was hella weird. Not arousing, but just weird. The images that I dreamed were P images and I guess after 60+ days, the P comes out. I felt dirty when I woke up, but nothing else.

Had some long talks with my GF to speak things through. I have been so fixated with building my company that I'm not anticipating triggers, as I've ascribed local hairdressers for my company. Or to considering to work with Social Media for a potential customer. Those doors need to stay shut, as they can lead to triggers. My GF sees that, but I didn’t. I finally, with her help and patience, come to see this.

Work-out:
Moved my workout to the afternoon. Did a rigorous dumbbell workout, but no pushups. Took a long walk in the evening.

Netflix:
Watched an hour of Netflix. I do that before 17:00. My evening is reserved for important things.

Meditation:
I only had time for 5 minutes of meditation without jeopardizing my bedtime.

Your Brain On Porn/Study:
In the beginning of my journey, my GF sent me a post of a lady who described how it felt to lose your SO to porn. The lady also gradually descended to a deep depression because she felt that she couldn’t satisfy her SO anymore. That post woke me up to the horrors of PMO and I'm grateful that that could reach me.

Sleep:
Slept a bit later and changed my evening routine to still manage to go to bed on time. Feel rested, but woke up at 3 AM. Don’t know why, but had a hard time falling asleep. At 4 AM I fell back asleep.

 

Day 4 - 5 - I`m doing good, but I didn`t sleep well last night and I`m not eating properly. I have to improve my self-care.

 

Yes. It's vital to bring this in your routine. Eating and sleeping at set times help me a bunch

 

Day 52. Feeling absolutely amazing, praise Him. I have come to a point now where the one time I am guaranteed to think about P is when I remember I have to check in, I feel this is counterproductive for me at this stage so I will no longer be counting days.

Best wishes to all, I hope you all achieve your goals, and thanks for the support.

 

Be aware that the battle is maybe won, but the war is still raging. Keep your PMO in check.

Best of luck!

 

Day 19 almost over. So far, so good. The guilt and shame from day 17's block instead turned into annoyance more than anything.

 

Completed day 2.

 

I fell off the wagon and I fell hard. Resetting. Today is Day 2

 

Day 62

Had a busy day with some intense talks, but I finished something that I liked. So I was happy. No urges. Morning wood this morning, but no problem not touching it. I had dreams again, but this time not sexual. I never remember my dreams, my since a few days ago they stick.

Work-out:
Did my dumbbell workout and finished it off with 26 push ups. Took a long walk in the evening.

Netflix:
Didn’t even manage to watch an hour of Netflix. Don’t miss it.

Meditation:
Meditated for 25 minutes. Tried a guided loving kindness meditation for the first time, but didn’t like it at all. Not for me at the moment.

Your Brain On Porn/Study:
I learned that a reboot will induce withdrawal symptoms. These withdrawal symptoms include anxiety, depression, tiredness, insomnia, irritability, aches and mood swings. I sometimes feel a bit down at times, but I now know it is a withdrawal symptoms. It’s not me, as it is the vestiges of the PMO addiction leaving the body.

Sleep:
Slept a bit later as I was still busy baking desserts. I feel rested. Could finish my evening routine, but everything was a bit later.