Hello I walked a few today on sunlight Sleep has improved at all,around 7 hours. I woke up at night one time. A cold symptoms today Mental health I've had some thoughts about my situation in life and my emotions. I've been trying to understand why for a few days now, my mind sometimes wants to escape from reality, I feel it's the emotional side. Mood Well I naturally had a brief time of good mood today, around 60 minutes. Strong urges. Before sleep yersterda before sleep but I managed to stay safe. I lay on the bed with my hands by my head and mentally told myself to calm down, it will pass. Healthy Only natural foods. No industrialized, over-processed foods. Just one more day.
Sorry to hear that you're feeling irritable and anxious. I'm struggling today as well especially with social anxiety and feel urges to act out. Just wanted to say that your progress is giving me motivation. Sounds like you are making progress as well and might be on the cusp of feeling better and maybe starting a run
Had an okay day today, didn't get much done but didn't act on urges either so I'm counting that as progress, will brush my teeth and go to sleep soon and take some time tomorrow to work on routine and plan my week so I can be more effective....
Congrats on the 10 days! Irritability and some mood swings are very common withdrawal symptoms. They go by themselves
Day 528 Had an okay day yesterday. Had good talks with my girl and was able to stick to most of my schedule yesterday. Workout: day 420 Did my push up routine, but no workout. Walking: day 430 Took a 30 min walk in the afternoon, a 10 min bike ride and a 34 min walk in the evening. Screentime: day 428 Total screentime yesterday was 4:00 from which 2:39 hours on Whatsapp (apping/calling with my girl) and 0:07 hours on the Internet (responding on NF) Lying: day 140 Take your partner along in the things you do on a daily basis. This will create trust. Meditation: day 518 4 sessions and 60 minutes. Want to keep it like this Language learning: day 86 I did my 5 sentences in Turkish. Plan to study 6 min again today. PMO study: day 528 Read in Worthy of her Trust about sexual infidelity. The writer speaks about his own secual infidelity and how he tried to fit his life around his addiction at a certain point. He was so depressed and tried to end his life, but instead he lived and started his recovery. Sleep: day 385 Slept at 22:30. Woke up at 6 to pee. Had a glass of water before bed Healthy eating: day 385 Weighed myself at 92,6 kg again! Ate leftover meat from yesterday and I put it in the dish from 2 days ago. The meat was very fat and my stomach revolted. Cold showers: day 428 It's getting colder outside, so I need to slowly decrease temperature
Good to read that you're feeling a bit better. Also very good to read that you keep on doing your stuff while being in this enormous pain.
Hello I walked a few today on sunlight Sleep has improved at all,around 6 hours. I woke up at night one time. A cold symptoms today Cold improved a bit Mood No positive mood change today Strong urges.Before sleep yesterday before sleep but I managed to stay safe. Healthy Ending another day without wheat Only natural foods. No industrialized, over-processed foods. That's it Just one more day.
My day was somewhat uneventful Volunteered in the morning and ate some food that really affected my stomach negatively, came home and rested, spent a little time with my family, studied a little, and am doing some planning and journaling here Looking forward to a productive week ahead...
Thats progress! I learned trough two masterfully written books, the compound effect and atomic habits that if you even improve a fraction of a percent per day, it will compound by a lot. I think 1% a week counts as 27 times better in a year. Focus on Nofap first, then your health, then maybe start reading, find ways to increase your income and so on. The possibilities are limitless but focus on that 1% a week at first.
Atomic Habits is a great book. I'm using its tools almost every day to understand my habit/addiction cycle and how to progress a little bit each day.
Day 529 Met my girl and we had some tough talks about my process. I initially felt attacked and defended myself, but decided to listen instead. That made room for respect and the conversation changed entirely. Workout: day 421 No routine and no workout. Yesterday was a rest day Walking: day 431 Took an hours walk in the forest with my girl in the afternoon and a 36 min walk in the evening. Screentime: day 429 Total screentime yesterday was 1:58 from which 1:02 hours on Whatsapp (apping/calling with my girl) and 0:11 hours on the Internet (responding on NF) Lying: day 141 Listen to your partner. When you go in defensive mode, listen to yourself first and see what you need. When you are clear with what you need and what you are not getting, it is easier to effectively go into the talk with your partner Meditation: day 519 4 sessions and 60 minutes! Language learning: day 87 I did my 5 sentences in Turkish. PMO study: day 529 Read in Worthy of her Trust about sexual infidelity and how the wife of this writer found out about his affairs. After he was caught, he decided to change his life drastically. He went into counseling and accountability groups to win back to trust of his wife. Sleep: day 386 Slept at 22:30. Healthy eating: day 386 Weighed myself at 92,2 kg. We ate french fries for dinner. Cold showers: day 429 I notice that I can turn the temperature dial colder because of my months of exposure
Day 7 Seems like I shaked off the initial chaser effect after my relapse. I havent had much urges at all during the last 7 days. Havent been thinking about PMO at all. My relapse seems like a little bump in the road now but I had a few uncertain days there where I really needed to focus and get back on track. Woke up at 7 am today and I feel well rested. My neck hurts as usual but not as much as the last few days. It will be manageable after I take some painkillers. The painkillers worries me a little though. I suspect maybe I have some problems with my liver or thyroid. I will get it checked. I am taking a really high dosage of painkillers and it affects my cognitive abilities. It is almost like I have dementia. My short term memory is almost completely gone and that causes some problems. Its been like this for a while though and maybe even before I started taking them so its hard to know what causes what. I was in the psych ward for 7 years and my cognitive abilities probably havent recovered from that yet. Fortunately I am off all the anti psychotics though. Those made me gain over 30 kg. Important milestones I have achieved recently: 60 days of reading at least one page a day and 60 cold showers!
Hey @Anx, I didn't see your check in yesterday. Are you doing okay? @Sam78 & @Don80, may I invite you to make the resolve to be abstinent for one day this week? Counting days in a streak is not for everybody, but I do notice that I find it very pleasant to have a measure of control over my process. And if it is 1 day of abstinence that can be promised to yourself, than this might also help with self esteem. You then see that you are able to keep yourself to your word of abstaining once a week.
Have you ever read no more mr nice guy? I dont know if you need it but it seems like you have some conflict with your girlfriend and I wanted to share something from that book: Dr. Robert glover, the author of the book is a relationship therapist and one of the things he says about women is that they are wired differently than men. Men prefer stability and no drama while womens emotional programming so to speak needs the drama to feel secure in a relationship. Unconsiously or consiously they are testing your reaction. If you react as a stable, confident man it will blow over pretty fast and they will feel okay again. Womens emotional circuit doesnt care about wheter its positive or negative tension. They just sort of need the drama. Its nothing personal about it. The best way to act is to not react too much. Say something like "give me the guy version". Men usually dont need all the details.
Day Twelve I don’t have much to say. Still here. Morning routine is kind of slipping so I need to get that back. My evenings become a little haphazard after work. Lately, I’ve been vegging out with t.v. to escape from some difficult things in my life. It’s not good behavior. I need to prepare to face them since they’re coming whether I like it or not. Some times I wonder if being on this site every day is productive towards recovery. I know it helps some, but I question if it helps me. I know a part of me uses this place to combat my boredom and loneliness. Maybe I need to stay here until I’ve found something else to replace it. I guess at the end of the day it’s better to come here than a porn site. I want the mindset that porn is poisonous. Lately I’ve been saying to myself porn is sexual antifreeze. I’ve always found antifreeze to be dangerous because it looks colorful like a soda and is sweet to the taste, but unlike a soda it will kill your ass if consumed. I have no urge to drink antifreeze because my brain has said NO! SELF PRESERVATION! I want that response to porn.
Thanks for checking in. I’m reflecting on my journey privately for now. I need to gather thoughts. And last week I had 4 clean days (in two streaks). Thanks again for all your support. I’ll be stepping back from the thread for a while as I focus on my personal reflections, but I wish everyone the best on their journeys.
Hello I walked a few kilometers today on sunlight Sleep got a little worse,half of yesterday I still have a cold Mental health I've again had some difficult thoughts and reflections on my real situation in life - without filters. Mood No positive mood change today Strong urges.Before sleep yersterda before sleep but I managed to stay safe. Healthy Ending another day without wheat Only natural foods. No industrialized, over-processed foods. That's it Just one more day.
