ACCOUNTABILITY GROUP FOR PEOPLE ABOVE 30 Y.O

Discussion in 'Accountability Partners' started by control your life, Nov 11, 2019.

  1. im’possible

    im’possible Fapstronaut

    Are you sure? I haven't seen anything since new year. Do we need someone as an acting host?
    Good to see new guys here.
    My reason is for development. My life is not fulfilling. So I'm putting my efforts on living like rest of the others, based on nofap.
     
  2. Brahmacharya_UK

    Brahmacharya_UK Fapstronaut

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    Sorry to hear about it @New Journey, though Kudos for the honesty.

    I'm in danger of passing a point of no return in the near future. All the signs are there. Having watched "P" a number of times recently, but with no finality. I have now summoned my succubus from the loft/attic (in the form of paraphilic items of clothing). These items are now within my reach, so I may be in trouble sooner than I realise.

    Whether I hear long term success or short term failure stories, both motivate me (in different ways) that I must succeed with this. I do however suspect that this time it could be too late for me, because I set these wheels in motion many weeks ago. I will see how I go - the draw of this drug is so strong, that all I want to do now is engage in it - like I'm powerless over it.

    NoFap panic button gives me this gem: https://i.imgur.com/qsNgtt5.jpg?1
    Need to get some sleep.
     
    cleanburger likes this.
  3. Checking in. After some major holiday depression and fucking about, I'm back and ready to fight harder. This pmo thing is a bitch, and just when things get good is when the guard falls. Hope everyone is doing well and fighting hard!
     
    cleanburger likes this.
  4. WigglyJKilla

    WigglyJKilla Fapstronaut

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    Yup, just relapsed again. Ugh. Feel shitty. I wish I had come to this forum first. I am mostly upset that I cannot even stick to a goal. I want to get just one week. I've done it before, but am having a lot of trouble this time.

    The thing is I know my trigger is stress/anxiety. I have a lot going on right now and I use PMO to "escape". I don't want to "want to" escape, if that makes sense. I just need to get through these first 3-4 days to get a good streak going and prove I can do it. Any advice, well wishes, or just your thoughts coming my way will help me out.

    I have faith I can get to a point where this doesn't control my thoughts so much, but it's so tough to see how I can get there.
     
    cleanburger likes this.
  5. Really hope @control your life is doing fine, 2019 was the last time he was around.

    If he doesn't come back soon, do you guys want to make a new thread to track? Or I could just make a new post in this thread and update that regularly. I wouldn't mind taking responsibility to update the counters.
     
    colio likes this.
  6. @12ove and @New Journey sorry to hear about your relapses. Hang in there and get back up.

    Checking in, Day 14 here.
     
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  7. colio

    colio Fapstronaut

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    Monday, Monday.

    Kind of a tricky Saturday, but Sunday was better. I exercised first thing Sunday and that really seemed to help. I got outside and set some intentions. Was far more pro-active. The hard part for me is that such a day is more the exception than anything else. It's cold in the morning, I'm tired, coffee, yadda yadda. But, it really did make a difference. I need to post that up so I can stumble into it at 6 am. Oy.

    But, did ok.

    All power to each of you for a great week.
     
    12ove and StraightEdge3616 like this.
  8. 12ove

    12ove Fapstronaut

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    Another day down. Temptations still not bad. Trying to stay busy. National Championship football on now.. I usually don't watch football but why not every once in a while.
     
    colio likes this.
  9. getitoverwith

    getitoverwith Fapstronaut

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    any recommendation on blocker/filter on PC? and on phone? I've tried K9 before but whenever I couldnt resist I turn it off...

    Thanks a bunch.
     
  10. 12ove

    12ove Fapstronaut

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    Ya I think we are here for everyone, but the main group may not add you unless there are open spots. Either way happy you are here. plenty of room for all imo.

    My biggest reason for being here is to improve the balance of my chakras...in so doing I will greatly improve my relationship with my gf, she is aware that I used to be addicted to PMO and it hurt her deeply when she found out..I have also probably pressured her subconsciously to have sex when she isn't all about it..hate to admit that it also affected my libido so the quality of sex I was having was not as intimate as it has been during parts of the nofap journey when I have been more succesful.
     
  11. 12ove

    12ove Fapstronaut

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    You are not powerless, and you can do it! Just stay on this site or walk out of the room! 35 days is a great streak! Imagine 90!

    We are here for you!
     
    Brahmacharya_UK and colio like this.
  12. Somethingsgottachange

    Somethingsgottachange Fapstronaut

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    Just about to finish day 7. Spoke to my psychologist today, told him everything that's happened the past few months . Was very cathartic. I had considered avoiding telling him everything sex related. But, can't really finish a jigsaw with that many pieces missing.
     
    12ove likes this.
  13. Checking in, Day 15 here. FYI, I probably won't be able to check in here for the next week starting tomorrow so if you don't see me around, don't be alarmed. I'll be back next Wednesday.
     
    12ove likes this.
  14. colio

    colio Fapstronaut

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    I finally did that, too a little while back. I really found that it paid off with a therapist in particular. The more I talked about it, the less power my behavior held on me. Like the taboo energy punctured and began to seep out. I had never, ever told anyone before. I had had a therapist for years, and never once told her. I wish I had done earlier. The more I think I talk about this stuff, the less power it has on me, and consequently, the more I feel empowered to choose differently.

    Really good on you. It's scary to do what you did. Big kudos.
     
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  15. colio

    colio Fapstronaut

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    Notes from the field.

    So about a week back, I gave up drinking alcohol for 30 days. I lasted 3. Woohoo! But, still, in those 3 short days, I slept better, and my morning fantasy cravings diminished. 3 days back I started drinking wine again at night. Immediately, mornings have been harder, and I've felt more emotional, and far far more prone to want to hang out in fantasy / imagination. That is always my slippery slope, middle circle zone. If I follow my fantasies, I'll begin surfing the web, and then sooner or later will relapse.

    This morning has been really slippery. I didn't even drink much. I think my sleep gets messed up, or who knows what, but I definitely feel the urge to relapse this morning. And my mind kicks in with, "but wouldn't it be fun?" - I'm going to counter here with:

    "Wouldn't it be more fun to kick this habit, and have more time?"

    "Wouldn't it be more fun to really connect with my girl?"

    "Wouldn't it be more fun not to feel ashamed?"

    "Wouldn't it be more fun to feel truly empowered in my daily life?"

    Yes, it would. Today, I'm choosing the long game. It's a bit of a Code Orange Day. I need to recognize that, and be ready to walk out of rooms, and take care to find dopamine elsewhere.

    Thanks for being here everyone. This forum is a massive life and spirit saver.
     
  16. Somethingsgottachange

    Somethingsgottachange Fapstronaut

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    Thanks dude.

    Yeah it was tough to work towards, but I figured what's the point if I don't. He was super supportive and non judgemental. And yeah, now I have someone to bounce things off. It's a win all round.

    Damn I woke up in the middle of the night last night, so ridiculously aroused. So many fantasy's. Im finding, this is my toughest time. I can deal with any other time really easily. But middle of the night, really all I want is that release to go to sleep again!
     
    12ove likes this.
  17. 12ove

    12ove Fapstronaut

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    Reading all of the posts, looking forward to hearing more about all of your battles. I will soon be going through similar stages in the recovery process.

    @colio I have an alcohol problem too. My gf really understands but gets super upset if I have more than 2 drinks a night. I think this is reasonable because I really haven't shown her that I can have less than 2 a night for an extended period of time. I am not going to make sure that I have less than that number except for the nights we go to a show or something like that. I am also going to try to have some nights with no drinks. This will all be to prep me for a month or two of sobriety. I really should start that asap because I will have a tough time not drinking when it gets warmer and the days get longer. If you want an AP for drinking lmk i'd be happy to join forces in the fight against the alcohol.

    I think it is great that you and @Somethingsgottachange have talked about it with psychiatrists. Keep on fighting!

    We can do this!

    Another day for me, first day since the relapse with urges to check out P again. I am here instead of there!

    (Random rant disclaimer) Seems like I am alone in the gambling addiction out of the people on this form. Mine never got out of hand so I am not too worried about it. I have had several days of no bets at all which is probably the best kind of day for a person like me. I really wanted to go to the basketball game tonight but my gf is busy and none of my friends could go. Kind of makes me wish that I had some more friends in my area, but I have a lot to do and should probably not go to the game anyway.
     
    colio likes this.
  18. 12ove

    12ove Fapstronaut

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    I hope he is well to. All we can do is send positive vibes and hope to hear back from him soon.. I would say feel free to take over the responsibility of scribe until he returns....up to you
     
  19. getitoverwith

    getitoverwith Fapstronaut

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    checking in. setting my goal to at least 90 days, which seems mission impossible to me (never lasted more than 2 weeks before joining this forum). stay strong guys!
     
    Brahmacharya_UK likes this.
  20. 12ove

    12ove Fapstronaut

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    My goal this time around is also 90 days. We can do it, "anything is possible!"
     
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