Adapting to NoFap is a gradual process - Don't beat yourself up

Hi guys,

Don't beat yourself up every time you relapse. The expectation is not to stop PMO immediately, that would be unrealistic. We are gradually adapting to a new lifestyle.

Long story short, I got heavily addicted at the age of 11, and my longest streak of no PMO is literally about 1500 days (I didn't count or know NoFap, but it was 4+ years straight) in my early 20s when I became a Christian. I had a very good environment that made it "easy" to have such a long streak, coupled with the fear of God, but over the years I have fully relapsed. This is now, in a sense, the second time I'm going to kill this addiction.

There is one thing I really want to stress for people who are doing this the first time:
Adapting to a NoFap lifestyle is a gradual process.

It's an adaptation process. Just how you can train your body to be stronger, which takes time, we are rewiring our brain, balancing our hormone levels, and cleaning our spirit. Bit by bit.

What I am pointing at is this: Don't beat yourself up every time you relapse.
Every time you last a bit longer than your previous streak, you have made progress. Just like how lifting a heavier weight, that previously you could not lift, makes your muscles grow. Any pressure you put up against the addiction is progress. Maybe for some the maximum weight they can carry is a few hours of NoFap. Others might be able to endure a week. It does not matter. What matters is that you are dedicated to overcoming this addiction, and that you exert the will-power that you are currently able to excert.

Of course, we always have to try to endure as long as we can, we try to endure "forever". But at the same time, it is not the expectation that we endure forever. The realistic expectation is that it will take time, and there will be many relapses. The definition of victory is that we put pressure against this thing. And over time, we will win. Two steps forward, one step backward. Three steps forward, two steps backward. Etc.

Your streak length will increase gradually. Whatever you can endure right now, that's what you are at. But be assured: Every time you stretch that streak a bit longer, you have done good for yourself. Don't set goals that are higher than what you can achieve. You are only going to beat yourself up, become disheartened, discouraged, and that will really set you back. No, go easy on yourself. Don't be slack, but also be kind to yourself.