Addicted to escorts

Discussion in 'Problematic Sexual Behavior' started by ScubaDude, Apr 17, 2019.

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  1. ScubaDude

    ScubaDude New Fapstronaut

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    I started seeing escorts when I was 35 and still married. My ex never found out, but I fell in love with an escort while I was going through my divorce. We have a very nice connection and even grew to the point of having unprotected sex. I’m sure I’m just a John to her, but she helped me enormously through my divorce and I always went back to her after a rough break-up. I have known her for 6 years now and we still text periodically, but I haven’t visited her in more than a year. I have seen other women, but nothing compared with the woman I fell in love with. I know I need to stop this behavior as I want to have a nice relationship and marry again one day. Porn and drinking drives me to look at the escort sites and I sent an email to one visiting town this weekend, but I’m going to cancel. It’s a hard hobby to give up - I always have been very sexual but find this is preferable to the dating scene.
     
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  2. g2stop

    g2stop Fapstronaut

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    Escorts are easy, dating is hard. But escorts are fake and dating is real. I guess choose which one is best for you, but know what you are getting. Escorts are only interested in your money and any feelings they show are fake.
     
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  3. blacklabel92

    blacklabel92 Fapstronaut

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    I feel like escorts are okay when the interaction is mutual. If i had a son id much rather him be addicted to escorts (a real human being) instead of sex dolls, toys and all that other stuff. I feel like you should just keep going with the flow. Your still a young man, single and ready to mingle. Leave your baggage at the dating world door. Start fresh, try buying some new clothes, change ur hair style. Listen to music you've never heard before and try to cut the drinking and porn to a minimal if u can.
     
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  4. L'empereur

    L'empereur Fapstronaut

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    Intentionally change it to sound right.
     
  5. TroubledLoner

    TroubledLoner Fapstronaut

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    I’ve visited my share of escorts in the past. For me, it was easier to part with the money than put forth the effort and risk rejection with a non-pro. The experiences always left me full of shame and my wallet empty. I know that hobbying is very hard to give up. I view this as akin to masturbation. Sure, another person was there, but my experiences were no more real than using a sex aid. The times I made a connection with a woman were far more intense and satisfying. If you can make a connection with an escort, good on you. Do you still pay her? For what? Sex? Friendship? Someone to listen to you? I think if all of your interactions come with a price tag, her connection is with your wallet and not with you.
     
  6. ScubaDude

    ScubaDude New Fapstronaut

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    I haven’t seen her in over a year, but we just text periodically with big life updates. There are not many like her - I know how it can be if it is just mechanical. I visited her many times and we even took vacations together. It was a very strong connection, but I’m sure if my wallet dried up she wouldn’t be concerned. I had a relationship over the last year and didn’t want to ruin it with seeing her. So I try and refrain from setting up a vacation with her and instead just keep in touch via text. I still send her a birthday gift every year.
     
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  7. Origin32

    Origin32 Fapstronaut

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    It seems like you found a regular. Since I have been engaging with escorts I have lost count of how many I've seen. There were a few that I enjoyed seeing on a regular basis, but they would end up disappearing - not answering my calls or texts anymore.

    About six months ago I was having this friends with benefits relationship with a co-worker at my old job, which kind of took away the drive of seeing escorts. The six months we were sleeping together I only saw one escort in that time span.

    The relationship I had with the co-worker made me miserable - we weren't a good match at all, but I continued to go along with things because she was genuinely interested in me, and I hadn't experienced that in years. Plus, having sex regularly was convenient, each time after we had sex I wouldn't talk to her a few days because it was draining for me emotionally. I just wasn't connected to her, and I kept going back.

    After me and her went our separate ways I started seeing escorts again, but no where as heavy before my relationship with her. I narrowed my escort use to only in times of stress.

    Your relationship with the escort you were seeing is unique, especially since you have been on vacations with her. I have never known an escort to be that personal. Any time I asked an escort if they'd like to meet outside of the transaction scenario was met with a quick no.
     
    Last edited: Apr 24, 2019
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  8. need4realchg

    need4realchg Fapstronaut

    I appreciate the banter here. I have acted out fantasies to reverse the role of an escort ( have her fall for me). I have had similar to what you describe. And I feel like I truly care for them kinda like a provider way.

    Escorts are still people and they do not plan to sell themselves forever. For them it’s a quick fix. I have seen more of them as I don’t get any physical touch at home. But I try to stick to my budget. Thankfully it’s usually no more than 40$ per session.
     
  9. lukasz.luk

    lukasz.luk Fapstronaut

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