After 90 days of Hard mode - Sickness and setbacks

Discussion in 'Success Stories' started by xxpjse, Apr 15, 2017.

  1. xxpjse

    xxpjse Fapstronaut

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    Hello world.

    Who am I ?
    I've been struggling with a porn addiction since I was 14. I'm currently 21 and I'm a student. I tried NoFap for the first time in 2014, and my streak was on 55 days. This is 3 years ago.

    My journey to reaching 90 days
    I started NoFap again in January, and the only difference now compared to 2014 is my experience. I've been trying it on and off since 2014. In other words, I knew what would make me relapse.

    Day 0-30
    After 30 days, everything was going great. My confidence was slowly building up and my anxiety was drifting away. This was a day by day thing, so I really didn't notice it, until now. In retrospect, the first 30 days was hard, however I felt really good towards day 30.

    Day 30 - 70
    Between day 30-70 I got sick and injured. I got a cold, bronchitis, pneumonia and hurt my knee really bad after working out. I'm used to dealing with set backs, but this was something totally new. Facing one problem after the other really challenged my mindset. I had a lot of spare time on my hands, which made this period very challenging. It's really important in situations like these to not fall for the tricks your mind is playing.
    -"Just one time"
    -"It's not gonna hurt you"
    -"Is really masturbation bad for you?"
    Questions you already know the answer to. Be strong, the battle is going on in your mind. Reading books and setting daily goals really helped me. Small things like :
    - Taking a shower
    - Getting out of bed
    - Taking a walk
    - Reading 10 pages of a book.
    - Meditate for 20 minutes
    It made me feel like I've actually accomplished something, instead of being sick and in bed. Between day 40-45 I started to have a bunch of wet dreams, which made me feel pretty shit about myself. Even though it's a natural way and totally normal. The key to solving this is MEDITATION, it helped me a lot, and not only in that aspect of life, but in feeling more aware about my existence.

    Day 70-90
    All the way up to day 70-75, I really felt like shit. I was so drained from Pnemonia and being sick for a longer period of time. But it's in the darkest times you learn the most about yourself. I remember especially thinking so many guys that achieved superpowers, and I didn't feel shit. I was at day 70, however around day 80 things started to turn. I felt this sudden urge to excel in life. I wrote down things I want to improve in, and started investing a lot of time in how to get better. The grind and the motivation just bounced back, "after all these years". And if you don't feel any superpowers or fancy shit like that, even at day 90, don't worry. Just work on yourself, set goals, small or big, depending on your situation and move forward. That's what's important; just try and move forward, this is your race and your life.

    What now?
    Now that've reached day 90, I can take a break right? like a little vacation?Little fap maybe? Fuck no. I've only started. This is the start of my journey and I know I'm going achieve great things. I need to work hard and be patient.

    Dealing with setbacks
    This might be your first try, or your 100th. Most of the guys here have relapsed a couple of times, so there is no shame in that. Just try again and learn from your mistakes. This is not easy, however it's worth it. It's an investment you make in yourself. I used to look at a bunch of reddit posts and be so jealous of these guys that've been doing this for years and had insane stories. And I used to compare myself to their stories. "At day 56, this guy had a really big confidence boost, and I feel nothing" and that is okay. Use their stories as inspiration, not to beat yourself up. Relapses are so hard to deal with, I know, but from every relapse you will come back stronger, no matter what.

    Message to the fighters out there!
    I believe in you. We all have a lot of potential, we can become anything we want as long as we set our minds to it. Doing NoFap will make you have a lot of spare time, so use it well. Fulfill your potential. Don't just sit around, set goals and crush them! Again I believe in you and if I made it, then so can you. You might make it on your first try , after 3 years, or even after 10 years, but that doesn't matter. As long as you're trying, you're doing it right.
     
    Last edited: Jun 7, 2017
  2. At a time when I was depressed about last nights relapse, this post somewhat changed my mood. Thank you for sharing :)
     
  3. xxpjse

    xxpjse Fapstronaut

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    Hey man! You can do it.
    Wish you all the best !
     
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  4. Smartboyj

    Smartboyj Fapstronaut

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    Hey man , that is such an honest and powerful post.

    Thank you for taking the time put your thoughts out there. You seem to have learned so much from all your relapses to date. And I really like the way you had a structured approach to battle this.

    Your words are an inspiration to me , I want to “burn the boats this time” and just get the mindset that P is just not an option in my life..

    Best of luck moving forward and thanks
     
    Lightseeker, Oskar kantor and xxpjse like this.
  5. Fap 5 Freddy

    Fap 5 Freddy Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for this post. I'm at day 31 and I'm feeling much better about hitting 90 days than I was at the beginning. I appreciate realistic posts like this - I have never felt the idea of super powers was a likely outcome from not masturbating to porn. I didn't masturbate to porn until about 15 years ago and I didn't have super-powers then, I just felt more normal and was probably a lot happier and more productive. Feeling confident because you have managed to not watch porn for a while after being addicted to it isn't a superpower. It's feeling good about an achievement. There's nothing wrong with that.
     
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  6. cgwbfimh

    cgwbfimh Fapstronaut

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    for the last 10 days I am having wet dreams on and of and i meditate 10-20 minutes a day. How much longer should I meditate each day to chase those dreams away? keep strong! :)
     
  7. xxpjse

    xxpjse Fapstronaut

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    Thank you, you're on the right path !
     
  8. xxpjse

    xxpjse Fapstronaut

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    That's very true. I think after all the years with P, people think it's normal to feel that way. Being sad, depressed and unmotivated. Suddenly after NoFap you feel this burst of energy and you feel confident in yourself, something you haven't felt in a long time. Again it's all about perspective.

    I look forward to see your 90 day post, my friend :)
     
  9. xxpjse

    xxpjse Fapstronaut

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    Hey man,
    I still do meditation and you have to do it consecutively. It's so great that you've started the habit of meditation, there are som many great health benefits to it. I had wet dreams even when I was meditating, but after around 2 weeks, they started to stop. Again this is just me, so if it takes shorter or longer time, don't worry.
    I hope this helped. Keep on fighting ! :)
     
  10. Oskar kantor

    Oskar kantor Fapstronaut

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    [Quote = "Abdullah, mensaje: 814.664, miembro de: 63967"] En un momento en que estaba deprimido por las noches última recaída, este post cambió un poco mi estado de ánimo. Gracias por compartir :)[/ quote]

    Animo mi hermano Tu Puedes Yo Puedo EL Pudo Vamos a Pasar esta pagina y rescatar nuestras vidas....un abrazo desde colombia
     
  11. Oskar kantor

    Oskar kantor Fapstronaut

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    [Quote = "Smartboyj, mensaje: 817.813, miembro de: 100521"] Hey hombre, que es un puesto tan honesto y de gran alcance.

    Gracias por tomarse el tiempo de poner sus pensamientos por ahí. Parece que ha aprendido mucho de todos sus recaídas hasta la fecha. Y me gusta mucho la forma en que tenía un enfoque estructurado para luchar contra esto.

    Sus palabras son una inspiración para mí, quiero “quemar los barcos este momento” y acaba de obtener la mentalidad de que P no es sólo una opción en mi vida ..

    Mejor de las suertes en movimiento hacia adelante y gracias [/ quote]

    Que alegria que estés luchando animo y para adelante mi amigo
     
  12. xxpjse

    xxpjse Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for the translation Oskar Kantor.
     
  13. Laz

    Laz Fapstronaut

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    I'm in the very beginning stages of this journey and its the stories like this that are keeping me going! Good job man.
     
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  14. xxpjse

    xxpjse Fapstronaut

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    Awesome Laz! Wish you the best bro
     
  15. Congrats bro! I'm one month away from reaching my first ever 90 days without fapping.
     
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  16. Lyart

    Lyart Fapstronaut

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    Such a nice post, I really enjoyed reading. May I translate it and implement it into my book, referring to you ?
     
    xxpjse likes this.
  17. xxpjse

    xxpjse Fapstronaut

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    Makes me so happy man! I hope you've gained a lot of experience from it. Best of luck in the future :)
     
  18. xxpjse

    xxpjse Fapstronaut

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    Yes Lyart, you have my permission. It's amazing that you take the time and effort to help others. Best of luck bro!
     
  19. Buddhabro

    Buddhabro Fapstronaut

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    This post rings of compassionate truth,honesty,and reality. Congratulations! I am inspired by it, in a real and non-delusional way.
    Thanks for keeping it real.
    This has been a really difficult habit to break and I learned that it will take much more time, effort, and discomfort if I am to overcome it.
     
    xxpjse likes this.
  20. xxpjse

    xxpjse Fapstronaut

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    Thank you! Realizing what you just mentioned is a crucial part to break the habit. You're on the right path.
     
    Siva Khaladin likes this.