Almost 18 and never had a girlfriend

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by wzg.3re, Jun 25, 2016.

  1. wzg.3re

    wzg.3re Fapstronaut

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    So I honestly don't know how to start this. Well, here goes nothing. I am turning 18 years old on July and I am still a virgin and I never had a girlfriend. I don't have many friends neither am I popular. I usually just be by myself. This could be great, but at times it gets boring.

    So I created an account here so I can stop jacking. I am so far have two days without fapping (not impressive isn't it?). By the way I sparingly jacked to porn. The idea of watching another mans dick (besides mine lol) go inside of a women disgusted me. I would gap to model shoots. So yes, I stopped and It feels good on an emotional and spiritual level, but my body will be tested. I will try not to do it. Anyways back to my issue.

    I am also an introvert. I think this problem has developed since being rejected, denyed and betrayed by several peers (regardless of gender). I used to be the person that wasn't so shy with anyone, nowadays I am shy with girls and even guys.

    I am trying to get in touch with my old ways by breaking out of the social awkwardness. I try and talk to random bystanders just whenever I feel like it and it's cool.

    I am also in the process of getting my driver's license and a car. I am going to college next fall.

    So what tips do you guys and girls have for me? I have been told by a few people that I am good looking and I will be lucky for any girl. I am not going to sit here and write that I am a nice guy or a "supreme gentlemen" because there is always room to improve as human beings. I have just been told by people that I am nice guy for a girl to date. But there are days that it seems like I will never get one. Other days, I just don't give a fuck and I do my thing.

    Please respond. Would love to read other people's perspective on how to break out of an introverted personality. I don't want to live like this forever.
     
    Last edited: Jun 25, 2016
    Jaylen, Namekian23 and Cockyau like this.
  2. BlackKnight

    BlackKnight Fapstronaut

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    Dude, I turn 18 in December and I've never had a girlfriend. But to get a girl, you need to be CONFIDENT. Go up to the girl that you're crushing on and just start a conversation with her. Ask her the usual,then get her #. See what she's interested in and just overall try and make her happy, but of course you need to flirt with her heavily. Look into her eyes when you speak to her, and compliment her, but no too much. And don't be overly nice, trust me, it doesn't work. You need to be aggressive and assertive. Let her know in the beginning that you want her. And most of all, DON'T MASTURBATE
     
    therealjocab likes this.
  3. Ikindaknew

    Ikindaknew Fapstronaut

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    I was EXACTLY like you.
    Good on you that you understand the porn stuff has to stop. Heal yourself right away, before you get in a relationship.

    I was 18 when I went to College and a girl started to circle around me. I had my first ever sex with someone with that girl.

    I thought that she would be the only girl to want me ever...so after some crazy sex times where we were banging like rabbits, I married her.
    She was not the right girl for me and we divorced after 5 years together.

    Later in my life I went back top College again to get incremental higher studies. Another women circled around me. I married her...now we are together for 20 years!

    So, the morale of the story is: Heal yourself, you will eventually find a nice girl for you. Treat her good, enjoy, be good and porn-less. She won't be the only girl you'll be able to meet in your life.
    Life has ups and downs, but being in a couple will heal you slowly...
     
    therealjocab and wzg.3re like this.
  4. wzg.3re

    wzg.3re Fapstronaut

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    How to I show my assertiveness? I feel like that is the way to get a girl but idk how I do that without being an asshole. Can you give me an example please?
     
  5. wzg.3re

    wzg.3re Fapstronaut

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    Yes, when I get my first girlfriend i will probably feel like she's the only girl that has ever liked me. Thanks for your suggestions man!
     
  6. BlackKnight

    BlackKnight Fapstronaut

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    Come off like you know what you're doing, like lets say you're talking to this girl you literally have to ooze confidence, like I said, let her know that you want her in more than just words
     
    wzg.3re likes this.
  7. Ikindaknew

    Ikindaknew Fapstronaut

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    No problem. And remember that for your whole life!
     
  8. wzg.3re

    wzg.3re Fapstronaut

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    So do I buy her something or do I create her something? I just want to know because I want to be a great boyfriend if indeed it happens.
     
  9. My friend, I'm 28 and still have never been in a relationship. But I haven't given up, either. If there's still hope for me out there, there's hope for you too.
     
  10. BlackKnight

    BlackKnight Fapstronaut

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    Buy her her favorite food, or if she has a necklace or bracelet that she possibly wants badly go and buy it for her
     
    wzg.3re likes this.
  11. wzg.3re

    wzg.3re Fapstronaut

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    Wow bro. Where I live it is strange to be a virgin and/or have never had a girlfriend at the age of 15-16. It's crazy because I have heard stories of my cousin in his middle school where kids are already performing sexual acts such as oral sex and other things. I have never received any of that and I am age 18. I don't really mind it as others do but in my location most people are dating, fucking, or both.
     
  12. I've never been much of a crowd-follower.
     
  13. Dan_Mann

    Dan_Mann Fapstronaut

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    I am an introvert as well - I always have been and always will be. Being introverted is not inherently bad. It is often misconstrued as being shy and awkward (two things you mention), but that is not true. Introverted people can be very confident, mindful, and interesting to others. Use it to your advantage. Women love a bit of mystery. I wouldn't focus so much on trying to break out of your own personality, but rather focus on improving your self-confidence.

    Also, keep in mind, all different women like all different kinds of guys. Some like shy guys, or guys who are dorky and awkward. I'm not saying you are any of those things. I'm saying it doesn't matter WHO you are as much as it matters that you be yourself. Be confident in you, because you sound like a nice, capable guy.

    I say these things to you as I am learning them myself. I am 26 though, and wish I could have learned this earlier. Best of luck, player. You'll do fine.
     
  14. Maple

    Maple Fapstronaut

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    My friend, I am 20 almost 21 and i have never had a girlfriend, and i just came bout " " this close of getting one last week when she turn cold on me and no longer wished to talk to me. so you have nothing to worry about to be honest, your going to be in college soon and there is a lot of opportunists waiting for you there. your only 18 and i bet you are probably better looking than I am, so cheer up man, like college is a place for you to renew yourself and find someone you care about. not having a real girlfriend doesn't mean anything.

    P.S. be more outgoing if you well, be aware of your surroundings and look are what is happening around campus. i am sure you will found your self a nice girl that you find interesting and the same goes for her. I wish you the best of luck my friend.

    P.P.S Don't try to be be someone who you are not, that [email protected] does not work at all, it will come back and bit you in the butt later on when you want to know the person you really like later on when she founds out you are not the person who she think you are.
     
    Last edited: Jun 26, 2016
  15. wzg.3re

    wzg.3re Fapstronaut

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    Ok so if I were to go up to a girl that likes shy guys(obviously I wouldn't know the first moment that she does like she guys) will she be able to accept my shyness and help me along? That would be pretty cool. Anyways, relationships and friendships are a two way street.
     
  16. Maple

    Maple Fapstronaut

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    All relationship have to start some where, it is your actions than will determine weather or not you are going to stay as friends, don't be annoying, don't be pushy, and don't be too obsessed. Just be your self and give the girl you like room to think and consider
     
  17. Dan_Mann

    Dan_Mann Fapstronaut

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    Yes, I agree with Maple. Also, don't expect a girl to help you with your shyness. You don't want to rely on someone else to help change you. Work to improve yourself and you'll find more female attention.
     
    Maple likes this.
  18. Willpower23

    Willpower23 Fapstronaut

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    yeaa i been reading this and u know wat? most of ya'll right and yes deff be ur self bro. but never never never be too fucking nice bro . i'm tellin u when i was 14 and had this crush and i was shy but nice...too fucking nice. long story short, she pretty much used me to get her things and do stupid shit and i got hip after but damage will still done. atm i was feeling some kinda of way , speed forward to 16-17 i was working and had a lil money and started to be one of those assholes who's always going to house parties and wearing jordan's and buyig a paid every so often. met the same girl(she was a local and known her years) but now it seems like she wants me and i gave her the cold shoulder. i be dancing with other women and she'd kinda push them to the side and come up and once the song was over,i walked away like she was shit... 3 weeks later she FB me and tell's me to come smoke and chill...i'm like "this person..." so i go over there and we smoking and shit and shes telling me how getting high make her hot and shit . didnt really care what she was saying but then i notice her younger sister which was 1 grade below us and then she join in the smoking and i gave all of my attention to the younger one during the session . i went home afterwards and FB the younger one and ask her wat shes doing tonight, "going to a party with my sister" and i said fuck that, come chill and smoke with me.... i pretty much fuck the shit out of her sister (no O:() at their house and i wiped my dick on the oldest one's pillow.....

    yes, i do hold grudges and i do that because i feel like im too nice and to giving to be played and made a fool of...
    but bro just dont get used, don't do shit because u feel like ppl will like u more (they won't and u become a sucker). and don't think your less than you are. im sure you a great fucking person and your gonna meet a great fucking person, wanna know why? @wzg.3re because ur gonna beat this addiction that we have and ur gonna be so in a much better place and the girl that you want will be yours and have love for you bro. won't even remember you teens years or you addiction... best of luck to you bro and DONT GIVE UP!!

    go beyond and plus ultra !!!;)
     
  19. tweeby

    tweeby Banned

    First off, if you're looking for dating advice you're on the wrong forum, this is a porn addiction forum. Go join a lifestyle improvement forum or 'how to get girls' forums.

    Failing that read the book of pook. It has everything you need to know in it.

    https://bookofpook.neocities.org/
     
  20. Cockyau

    Cockyau Fapstronaut

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    I'm 23 and never have a girlfriend. I confessed, got rejected while I was in my high school (around 16-17). The girl said it's not the suitable time for her to get into a relationship but weeks later, she was in relationship with another guy in my class.

    Whatever. Her loss.

    About the 2 days of nofap, it's far better than my last decades of maximum 1 day of nofap. Everyone has their 2nd day. Keep advancing. ;)

    "Introvert": I used to it too. Can't even keep any eye contact with strangers or sibling's friend. Some people will suggest to work on it. I was, however, never really work on it. All I did was study and fare well in my academics, I care nothing else besides it, really (besides of academics my other aspects were sucks last time lol). It really works the magic! Confidence, over-confidence, new perception of mind, and many more other things are triggered along the way. Note that I was still kind of shy when seeing girls. Later on I just no idea how I overcome it. Now I'm introvert too, just not that "introvert". I can talk and chat well with people (if we have topics to chat on of course) that just met and keeping eye contact.

    One nice act, triggers many things.
     
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