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Discussion in 'Success Stories' started by jfromcr, Jul 4, 2016.
Congrats bro. that's a goal we can all aim for. we all have to work for it one day at a time.
You most be a Guru !!! Congratulations !!
wow! lets have a toast!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Let's win some more!
Hello @joarev85, thank you so much for writing this. It really touched his heart (and it brought me to tears thinking "all that crap we went through is sooo worth it.")
Thank's @lfromcr, it was written by my heart, and I am so happy about it touched someones heart and brought you to tears. BUT!!!.......:'( in the end I gave in. I relapsed many times. Binged for whole days. Exhausted, left to die inside. Feeling like a zero. BUT! Hard time. I will get back up. Fallen man is back on track. This is a new journey.
@joarev85, sad to hear you relapsed, BUT glad you're facing how miserable it makes you.
and YES! If you fall, just make sure you get back up. It's time to 'go again'!
Here's a song to look up:
"One More - Superchick"
I have to be the Devil's advocate here. If after 6 years you still don't even have unrestricted access to the Internet, have you really overcome your problem? I am impressed by your will power nonetheless, however I'd like to think that at the 6 year mark you should be at the point where you have enough control to avoid bad websites and videos on YouTube on your own, with no blocks, accountability partners and unrestricted access, and you can have a smartphone like a normal adult. Just a thought...
I wish you all the best with your plan. This is my sixth time in my adult life to get away from my addiction. Because the first few times happened before the internet, there was a choice to go back to the magazines (paper things with pictures in them). The last time I had six years it all went to hell because I had a major life change that caused significant disruption. So, a "normal" adult might be able to have a smart phone.
A "sober" adult that is 20, 30, or 40 years clean of alcohol doesn't keep whiskey in the house.
And from what I can tell on this site, most "normal" adults are struggling with a porn demon that is kicking their ass.
I know for me and my personal experience that "fool me once shame on you, fool me six freakin' times and I have a problem". I don't doubt that some of you all will find a way to navigate life and still have full access to the internet. For me, I know what I need and being able to see porn just so I can say "I have self control over porn" doesn't seem worth the pain of damaging my marriage again.
Be all the devil's advocate that you "have" to be, cause he sure needs more help in tanking other people's sobriety.
Hey @jfromcr, That post reminds me of one of my new favorite songs:
"People call us boring yeah
But I'm okay with that
Friday night with Chinese food
I wanna take it back
to my place
And play Super Mario Kart again
There's a little bit of loser in us
Just two weirdos who fell in love
I guess were made from the same weird stuff
Being a loser with you doesn't suck"
(Plus: I'll take "happy with YOU" over "normal" any day.)
Wow your Amazing bro.
Love to read a successful post like this. It shows me that there is hope at the end of the tunnel. Thanks.
THanks for supporting my hubby, @JTT!
(BTW: love your avitar pic! Shows such humility : )
Yes there is hope, @Svsc . Just find whatever WORKS for you and do it : )
That's REALLY great! I think one of the things about a project like this is that one visits the site when he's failing, and can visit it less the longer it's been: but having people like you come back to encourage us is so important. Thanks for coming back after 6 years to share the good news!
@Ifomcr. Do you think you will be here in another 6 years? Like an alcoholic do you think you will always have the urge?
Amazing milestone, big accomplishment! well done and i hope this event brought you and your wife even closer!
Well done friend... I cant help but feel shame and guilt in reading this, you took the step that is exactly needed to overcome porn addiction, most of us just don't do that and if we do.. We then take 20 steps back (removing internet restriction programs/changing password/etc) and end up digging a hole much deeper for ourselves.. Much deeper because we do it while being conscious to the detrimental effects of porn usage and then we feel even more crap.
I have been struggling this past half a month.. I had a nice streak of 50 or so days after struggling for many months.. But then i just edge and indulge and feel awful.. I have been on going with this for the past 3 years.. Trying to consciously give up porn completely but every time i just go back.. But my life is different and it has been better since dec 3 2014..
I would like to know though, what program do you use to block porn? Is it k9? and if so how do do you cope with it blocking material that isn't porn or p-subs?..
Oh and if you haven't formatted your computer in six years then it must be hella slow
I think that I will be here in the next six years because I want to see other people get free. I will always be "sensative" to the possibility that some form of porn could trip me up. But I think that I am free in the sense that I have developed my responses and think about where I am going before I get there. If that makes sense to you. Thanks for asking.
I use a combination of things. I start with covenant eyes, which has a filter and a tracker. It doesn't create to many limits for me on the filter side. When that does happen, I find the information some other way.
I also have OpenDNS set up on my home network, it is completely controlled by my SO. There are some things that get blocked here be I typically don't "need" what it is blocking and either give up or try another site.
I also have Flash turned off, all ads blocked, and an extension in chrome called Text Mode. What this does is eliminate a lot of unnecessary images and movies on the sites that I visit. Text Mode removes all images, so I use that on sites I have never been to because I don't want any surprises. Because I am cautious about where I browse my computer runs quite well.
Overall, I feel like my "curiosity" was a big part of the problem for me. I just "had" to satisfy my need to know about something or someone and that led me somewhere I really didn't need to be. So, I feel like a blocker may say that a site is "adult" and that I should respect that assumption. There may be another place to look or just live in the not knowing and still being OK.
Thanks @jfromcr. It's very helpful to have someone like you around here, thats has come so far. I'm determined to to the 90 days, 365 days and beyond. I always think the urges will be out there though.