Am I imagining things

You can't have a relationship without trust.

If you are a woman that can be trusted, then move on and find a man you can trust. Don't waist time with people that make you feel this way.
You should be dating a guy that make you feel amazing.. not like this. I'd better be alone because I value myself, if you also do then move on.

 

What are your boundaries for a relapse? For lying? You enact your boundary. You do not ask him if he’s relapsed. You know he has. If a relapse means separation/divorce then you move forward with that. If you have seen huge clear changes in recovery then perhaps sit down and discuss his relapse. Don’t ask, you tell him you know. When he denies, you tell him you know, when he asks how, you say you just do. Let’s be real here, you know when he’s relapsed and you know he lies. You feel it in your gut. Forget about him for a moment, what do you want? What do you want to do?

 

It's suspicious the paper has to come from somewhere. If he just said he doesn't know where it comes from then he's lying unless more people live in the house.

 

Being the smartass that I am I'd said "ya know that toilet paper fairy could have come around when there was no toilet paper on the shelves at the store when covid hit" I agree. Unless you put it there he did. When you add up all of the red flags, how many do you have?

 

whats it like between the two of you intimately?
you will know when things are not quite right.

 

you wont know but pied tells a lot.
maybe find stuff to do that you like and focus on that.
time will tell. but one thing is for sure, he wont change for you. he has to change for himself.