am i missing something?

It's one thing to try to challenge yourself to do something hard.

It's another to try to combat a deeply ingrained chemical dependency that has developed over years when the drug is right there in your pocket available for free and in infinite supply and variation on demand. And culture is telling you it's ok and maybe even encouraged.

It takes more than an iron will. At the least you need a plan and support and replacement activities. And individually maybe more than that.

Don't think you can brute force it. Bring people you trust in to your struggle. Take up new hobbies to fill your free time. Have go to phrases or behaviors to help you overcome cravings. Actively change your attitude and perspective about porn.

Even then sometimes it feels futile. Like why am I even depriving myself in the first place? Better have an answer for yourself when that question comes up. What's your why?

It's not easy. It's harder than the hardest thing you've ever done. Evidently. But it can be done.