Am I really addicted to porn

I’ve been questioning wether im really addicted to porn, I can get aroused by pretty much any porn, being gay porn the least arousing, I have Ocd, a lot of themes of it being one of them sexual ocd, hocd and incest ocd, I started checking myself with pictures of highly feminine guys, almost looking like females and checking my levels of arousal, I try to picture them with vaginas and if i get aroused I start imagining them with penises and I loose the arousal, but afterwards my head keeps hammering that I like guys more than girls, have you guys ever heard about such a thing

 

But any porn can arouse us right?

 

But penis doesn’t arouse me, maybe it is the twisted idea that porn gave me of femininity. I hate it, I just truly want girls but the thoughts, the anxiety its crushing

 

But the thing is, if I force myself into it, I can feel something, not that strong, once I got a big semi but only when im anxious when im relaxed, nothing happens. And hell why do I obsess about this, Im a piece of shit that gets aroused by zoofilia, and well zoofilia is wrong, being gay is totally fine, but i think im not. i used to get slightly aroused by gay erotica too, not anymore but i keep obsessing

 

Like, Im not super aroused by it but 50% of the time theres some arousal

 

No, I could not ever have sex with a male, I do get very anxious when I get intrusive thoughts and strong weird sweilling sensation but no I never got aroused by the idea of having sex with a man, masculine or feminine, But the reactions i get to porn it freaks me out and i feel like shit, I get reaction to anything sexual, anything, and thats kinda scary

 

And, hocd makes you do compulsions, like browsing through porn to reassure myself, I started obsessing that I got raped, i wasnt but i got obsessed and well my mind said “maybe you’ll get aroused by male anuses” so I went on, everyday, browsing through pictures and melting from anxiety and fear, and I had always this sweilling sensation, like i was going to get super aroused and i never did, only a partial erection once (almost full) and i would masterbate and stop, wait look at the images and lose the arousal, some times i would be so anxious that I felt like fainting, can you understand when i say looking like im getting aroused but never actually never getting it, only if i force myself. At the end of the day only women make me comfortable. I got aroused by a picture of a femmeboy once too, he had tits and all and i imagined him with a vagina, im kinda confused and numb

 

When im not anxious, nothing happens when i check gay p

 

Yes, im gonna commit this time, try to maintain my compulsions inside of my head only, I can only think about this and is sucking the life out of me.