Am I too harsh on myself?

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by HighFlyer, Jan 8, 2018.

  1. HighFlyer

    HighFlyer Fapstronaut

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    Hello,
    after starting nofap almost two years ago, i realised how much my life sucks and that everything has been going on distracting myself from brutal reality with pmo. It was so pleasurable that it didn't matter that the whole day was filled with the things i hated, because i always had the sweet 3-4h in front of the screen waiting for me in the evening.
    Last year i started to experiment with beating another addictions that i found myself in. Now I'm in a place that I broke up with:
    all social media, youtube, all sorts of tea, nutella, chocolate, sweetened drinks, video games, fast foods, caffeine
    Apart from that I don't:
    smoke, drink coffee, drink any kind of alcohol, don't have smartphone
    But the second category not hurt me at all, because i have never been indulged in it.

    One might said, that now i should be the happiest and most productive person on the planet, hah?
    Nope. I'am not. In fact, i have never been more depressed. To be honest i feels like a piece of f***ing shit. I think I could easily bear nofap, that's no problem. Things that are lacking the most are chocolate, nutella, sweetened drinks and a little video games.

    I wonder if it was not too much addiction to fight at once. Our brains is like a small child playing in a sandpit. It seems logical, that when I whip him all the toys, he will be crying. What do you thing?
     
    A41:14A likes this.
  2. Single Palm Change

    Single Palm Change Fapstronaut

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    Sugar cravings should go away if you abstain from it for a while. You are most likely still eating some sugar, and this triggers your cravings. So cut out ALL sugar products. Look at what you buy and see if it has added sugar. Also cut out artificial sweeteners.

    Limiting yourself from negative influences like you do is not being hard on yourself. That's being good and friendly to yourself.

    But if you do it out of a feeling of self-hate or a deeply felt need for improvement, then you are feeding the "not-good-enough" mindset.

    These positive things that we are doing, abstaining from negative influences and taking better care of our bodies, these should come from a feeling of love and friendliness.
    Remember that all you are doing is because you love yourself. Sometimes it can be hard to feel, but it's there. Dig a little and you will feel it.
     
    A41:14A, HighFlyer and MikeyRamirez like this.
  3. J4220

    J4220 Fapstronaut

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    That's a lot to give up all at once. Try focusing on 1 - 3 of those addictions at a time. Then when you abstain for a long period of time start working on others.
     
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  4. HighFlyer

    HighFlyer Fapstronaut

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    Thank you Man, this means a lot. For a moment i felt loved, at least by myself.

    I wonder if it was the right moment to tackle all of these addiction at once, because now, that I have already been pretty depressed, it may only add insult to injury. Anyway, I continue and told to myself that I can come back to old habits at any moment, because it will always be there waiting for me.

    PS
    I forgot to add one more addiction, fortunately cured by one - online sports betting (gambling), which has taken good 4 years of my life and quite a lot money from my bank account. It's around 3 years since i quitted. It was a piece of piss comparing to nofap.
     
    Single Palm Change and A41:14A like this.
  5. Silver Skull

    Silver Skull Fapstronaut

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    its baby steps, your intentions are correct of course but barring yourself from things you enjoy that are not dangerous like tea, chocolate, food you like, videogames all these are examples, you cant just take them away, life has to have joy in it, you can avoid overdoing them i guess, but dont deny yourself happiness bro, kill pmo and bury it, might as well do the same with alcohol and drugs but, the other stuff do it in baby steps
     
    A41:14A likes this.
  6. Single Palm Change

    Single Palm Change Fapstronaut

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    Well, it all depends on who you are.
    Some people who have a moment of sobriety realize how fucked up they are from all kinds of different stimulation all the time. They then decide to cut them all out to reset and get real again. Nothing wrong with that.

    I actually believe that pleasure and joy is a quality that comes from within us. I think you would agree that it is possible to be happy without chocolate and videogames. I think we limit ourselves and our happiness by relying on external aids to bring us happiness.

    But then again, I see your point. We should not let go of our's crutches before we are able to fully walk.

    I quit alcohol for two months last year. Then I had some beers during the christmas holidays, a couple everyday. Now I'm off the alcohol again, until the start of february where I have a very special dinner coming up. I like to spread it out like that. For me it feels much better, the buzz is much better when it's deserved and planned and shared with special people at special occasions.
     
  7. Single Palm Change

    Single Palm Change Fapstronaut

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    Thank you, I am very happy to hear that. I hope you will cultivate many more of those moments.
     

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