American 34 yr old christian male looking for AP

Discussion in 'Accountability Partners' started by Dschamplin5, Sep 12, 2018.

  1. Dschamplin5

    Dschamplin5 Fapstronaut

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    Hey

    New to this site looking for some other believers to be encouraging and uplifting. Who will give prayer and support.
     
  2. I Want To Be Me

    I Want To Be Me Fapstronaut

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    I'm a 32 yo male and I just joined as well. I'd be glad to pray for you and provide some accountability, if you'd like. Feel free to send me a message--I log on about once a day.
     
  3. benRahamin

    benRahamin Fapstronaut

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    Hi, 34 years old. I would like to help with prayer. access daily
     
    I Want To Be Me likes this.
  4. Ase

    Ase Fapstronaut

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    Brothers, I need a Christian AP as well. I am very new to this. How do we do this? 30 Male.
     
  5. nate311

    nate311 Fapstronaut

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    Hey guys, I'm interested as well. 33y/o christian. Never had an AP. Not sure how to do this either. Do we get like a facebook messaging group together?
     
  6. Dschamplin5

    Dschamplin5 Fapstronaut

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    Yeah I not really sure how to do this either but I think a facebook messaging sounds like a good idea
     
  7. FranktheTank7

    FranktheTank7 Fapstronaut

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    35 M looking for AP for 90 day reboot hard mode. what do we do?
     
  8. Ase

    Ase Fapstronaut

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    You're are doing so well based on your tracker. Are you doing a hard mode reboot?
     
  9. Ase

    Ase Fapstronaut

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    I don't know what to do either. I would just encourage everyone to go on here daily to check up and to reply to each others posts. I am on day one. I would really like to have someone to talk to when I have urges so I can beat this 90 day challenge and beyond.
     
  10. Dschamplin5

    Dschamplin5 Fapstronaut

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    NoFap has a christian group you can join. That might be a good place to start
     
  11. nate311

    nate311 Fapstronaut

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    I am doing well, actually on "easy mode" though (have a fiance) -- getting married in a week. Been PMO free for over 100 days but edged about 40 days ago. So porn free for 40 days.

    I'm just worried that I'll fall back into bad habits after the wedding. Would be nice to have accountability. I'm happy to help any of you. Send me a private message and I'll share my phone number so we can text or call.

    I've heard that groups are a good idea too. Matt Dobshcuetz of Porn Free Radio suggests them. Maybe we could do an accountability group?
     
    oneotwo likes this.
  12. I Want To Be Me

    I Want To Be Me Fapstronaut

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    I'd be interested in joining a group, too, or continuing to check in on this thread. This week has been better, though the urges come and go. I've found that when I feel like going to a particular site, or if I'm feeling lonely, that it helps to log in here and check for messages. I've also used the "panic button" a few times on the main page, and it helps a little.
    The short term gratification is not worth the regret, sadness, depression, and self-loathing that comes after. I hope future-me can remember that, and I wish everyone well.
     
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  13. I Want To Be Me

    I Want To Be Me Fapstronaut

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    I'm inspired by the people in this thread, and I joined the Christian group hoping for more.
    For the sake of accountability, I regret to admit I relapsed today. It would have been 8 days, and now I'm back to zero :(
    But I'm trying to stay positive and learn from my mistakes. I'm not trying to hit thirty days, or 90 days, or even a year. I want to be done with this nonsense for good. This morning, I started losing the battle when I started to rationalize and then bargain with myself. "I'll do this, but I won't do that."
    Future me: if you're reading this, DO NOT BARGAIN. You should know better. It never works. If you cross any line, you're going to trip. Just don't do it. Find something else to do, and if you know you're going to be weak on your first day home after a long weekend, then get out of the house. Don't come back until you know you're safe.
     
    nate311 and The Decision like this.
  14. The Decision

    The Decision New Fapstronaut

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    I don’t want to join your group or anything but you can start a group chat room on discord. It’s a free app that’ll notify you when someone posts a message in the group and you can talk to each other privately on it as well. It’s free to download on your computer and phone. There’s also WhatsApp thats free as well. It’s pretty much the same thing as discord but it requires you to add each other’s phone numbers. Discord has the advantage of being able to have group calls though as well as video chatting, oh and it can be on your computer if you don’t have a phone. WhatsApp is for your phone only. You can make a group chat in Skype too, same thing as discord basically but I find it to be a bit more fickle with the video chatting but easier to use in general. You could also use KIK it’s a phone app like WhatsApp except you don’t need to exchange numbers. I hope I helped spark some ideas. Best of luck you guys!
     
    I Want To Be Me likes this.
  15. Dschamplin5

    Dschamplin5 Fapstronaut

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    Unfortunately I relapsed yesterday. I've been working 16 hour days and have been really stressed out. I'm tired of this crap I am ready to be done with it.
     
  16. Nature_Calling

    Nature_Calling Fapstronaut

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    Heya lads, another christian here, 29yr old. Got place for another lost soul? I tend to have nofap in the back of my head but that strategy hasn't brought me anywhere in the past 15+years.

    The only thing I've managed to accomplish is to talk myself into doing it, and by doing so making it harder to avoid another relapse. Every time I trip it feels like my resistance is broken and a habit is born. It has been going on for long enough now, I know I can't quit alone because when I'm not paying enough attention I can and will be going for that quick fix.

    Also looking forward hearing/seeing other people their experiences and what fail saves they might or might not have.
     
    I Want To Be Me likes this.
  17. I Want To Be Me

    I Want To Be Me Fapstronaut

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    Sorry to hear that. I wish I knew what the silver bullet was to avoid relapsing when stressed, but I don't. It happened to me, too. But looking back at the past week, I felt a little less worthless and a little less ashamed with each day that passed without PM. It was a good feeling, and the disappointment I felt when I relapsed was the opposite.
    It can be done. Certain members on here are proof of that.
     
    Nature_Calling likes this.
  18. nate311

    nate311 Fapstronaut

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    Sorry to hear that you guys are struggling. Working 16-hour days sounds brutal. In order to be successful with our recoveries, we need to take good care of ourselves. That means getting plenty of sleep and exercise, and it most certainly means NOT working that much. You need to figure out a way to cut back on your hours, otherwise you will continue to fail, period.

    That being said, I'm not sure it's helpful to make any excuses whatsoever. If we condition ourselves to make rationalizations and excuses, then we are priming ourselves to relapse. The list of excuses is absolutely endless: "I'm stressed", "my wife isn't in the mood", "I got rejected for a date", and on and on. You need to convince yourself that there are zero excuses.

    If the thought of masturbating or looking at porn even enters your mind, immediately think of how it's ruining your life and why you're on nofap in the first place. Make a bulleted list of the reasons why you want to stop. Think of that instead of how you're stressed or tired. Don't entertain the excuses.

    There is a wealth of information out there on techniques to avoid relapsing: cold showers, pushups, meditating, porn filters etc. This is my all-time favorite post and I hope it helps you: https://redd.it/35tc2z

    I know all of this is easier said than done, and this journey is NOT easy, for anyone. But you need to at least take the basic steps. And it might sound tough, but I do think you should get at least 30 days down before you report a "relapse" — it's not a relapse if you've never even stopped fapping for more than a few days.
     
  19. Dschamplin5

    Dschamplin5 Fapstronaut

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    Hey have any of you guys read the Every Mans Battle book. Was just wondering if it's worth reading.
     
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  20. FranktheTank7

    FranktheTank7 Fapstronaut

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    Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. Psalm 23:4

    Prayers to you OP. Remember God is with you always.
     
    I Want To Be Me and nate311 like this.

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