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An unorthodox strategy

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by sparkywantsnoPMO, Apr 19, 2017.

  1. sparkywantsnoPMO

    sparkywantsnoPMO NoFap Moderator & Yeoman

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    I've joined just under a week ago, and I have noticed a frequent recovery symptom that most people seem to have that I lack. Most people seem to be dealing with urges to look at anything that remotely resembles porn - youtube, advertisements, people walking down the street. I have urges to PMO, mostly MO, but I'm not suffering the above issue. I seem to have enough self control to look away when it's involuntarily presented to me, and enough not to want to look for it. Below is a possible difference. WARNING: could be triggering.

    Please let me know what you think.

    I started trying to break out of PMO about a year ago. This started because I decided to join a religion that identifies all of it as a bad sin. My original plan was to stop all visual porn immediately and use stories only to help wean me off (kind of like a nicotine patch). In a year, I only had 2 slips with visual porn (hentai). I never visited a picture or video porn site of real people again.

    As for the stories, each month, I reduced the number of days each week I was able to read the stories (days of the week specifically). The theory was to take about 7-8 months and slowly reduce the shock. This part didn't work because I didn't replace this with a more healthy stress reduction activity. I did not masturbate without the stories. In my mind, the use of some kind of stimulation was necessary. When M with no P, I found myself having to fantasize, and it would always be with real people, either in porn I'd seen previously or real people (usually previous sexual encounters). I did not want to objectify women at all, and so the stories allowed me to use imaginary characters.

    On the other hand, I did notice the changes above. I no longer objectify women, I can look away from images, and I do have control over fantasizing thoughts. This helps me focus on trying to stop the MO now. It also helped me establish for myself that porn was having a negative effect on me, as well as establishing that any type of use was still bad. Mainly, I still felt tempted to return to visual porn.

    I definitely don't think this will work in all cases, but perhaps for the person who has failed numerous times and simply can't handle cold turkey? Again, I want to emphasize that by itself it did not succeed, but I do feel that symptoms are less severe.

    For background data, I had been using porn for about 20 years and masturbating for about 22-23.
     
    Last edited: Apr 19, 2017
  2. Bob2132

    Bob2132 Fapstronaut

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    I agree with using unorthodox strategies. Your strategy has to be suitable for you. It is not one size fits all. Everyone is different.
     
  3. I Free I

    I Free I Guest

  4. Homelander

    Homelander Fapstronaut

    I applied the same strategy but was using images to softspoon myself from porn videos. This was 6 months ago and I havent a single porn video since nor felt any urge to do so.
    However, I was still lying to myself because I was looking at porn images and masturbating from sex memories.
    This edging was taking me nowhere and was keeping me vulnerable for relapse.

    So i stopped edging and now feel the benefits from seamen retention for the first time in my adult life.
    You could say that I'm well on track, but I still relapsed by doing phone sex with a Tinder date and I still have PIED.

    My recovery will require me to keep on the hard no-pmo track and this will be forever because I rather be dead than to return to my old porn addiction lifestyle.
    I'm never going back, never.
     

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