Treeman1919
Fapstronaut
Heyo
I'm looking for some advice and other people who have went through the process of rebooting.
Heres some background info on me:
I've watched porn from 15 years old (Now 20). It intensified gradually reaching almost daily usage from 17-18 years old. Smoked weed from 17 years old time to time, not regularly. Started to smoke daily at age 19 while at college. I felt desensitisation, not really happy from daily things from age 19, considering the higher usage of weed. Suddenly, I started to feel very strong anxiety in almost a weeks time, having trouble sleeping and just overall strong anxiety. I was really confused. I was still smoking weed and using porn on a daily/every other day basis. The anxiety and depression state continued for half a year till it really got worse and I really didn't understand where this was coming from since it just smacked me out of nowhere (the anxiety). After countless months of research, i figured it out. It was porn all along.
Im currently on about day 75 (hard mode) and have rollercoaster of emotions. I had no relapses, a few urges but never serious. I catch myself sometimes that I browse instagram and stare at hot girls but snap myself out of it. My anxiety comes and goes and a few weeks it might be very small and the next two might be very strong. At the first 2 months were hell. Really strong anxiety, depression, muscles tension in the face and limbs, insomnia, wet dreams, temper so bad, that sometimes more funny than angry at myself, and all of them had its on sequence.
Right now I mostly feel constant anxiety and tension bu slightly more happier, headaches, better focus but an overall brain fog where its hard to focus visually on things that I'm looking at. Sleep is much better, with vivid dreams but still feel fatigued throughout the day. It's the anxiety thats bugging me. The question always arises is, when will it get better...?
I exercise a lot, always have been, eat healthy, and have a stable social life, no girlfriend, hanging out with friends and playing video games (not a hardcore gamer, play a few hours with friends every night).
My problem is that whenever I get really anxious and depressed, I search for information to calm me down, either here on other forums and that always helps and sort of puts me in that state that it's a process and will eventually end. I might add, I noticed my anxiety is very tied with withdrawal symptoms during the withdrawal. "My head hurts, I feel dizzy, something bad is about to happen to me." Stuff like that. I used to have some sort of fears in my childhood that tie back to me being afraid of something that might harm me, but it was never a thing that affected me negatively or impacted me in any way. It just came and went, never had any abnormal anxiety before it came out of nowhere while still using porn, and during the withdrawal. So while browsing the forums it never feels like it's something really related to my experience for some reason, since I had anxiety before starting the withdrawal process.
So the question is, have you have experience something like this where you become anxious while being a daily porn user? I would love to hear your overall experience if any of this what I said it related to you.
I'm looking for some advice and other people who have went through the process of rebooting.
Heres some background info on me:
I've watched porn from 15 years old (Now 20). It intensified gradually reaching almost daily usage from 17-18 years old. Smoked weed from 17 years old time to time, not regularly. Started to smoke daily at age 19 while at college. I felt desensitisation, not really happy from daily things from age 19, considering the higher usage of weed. Suddenly, I started to feel very strong anxiety in almost a weeks time, having trouble sleeping and just overall strong anxiety. I was really confused. I was still smoking weed and using porn on a daily/every other day basis. The anxiety and depression state continued for half a year till it really got worse and I really didn't understand where this was coming from since it just smacked me out of nowhere (the anxiety). After countless months of research, i figured it out. It was porn all along.
Im currently on about day 75 (hard mode) and have rollercoaster of emotions. I had no relapses, a few urges but never serious. I catch myself sometimes that I browse instagram and stare at hot girls but snap myself out of it. My anxiety comes and goes and a few weeks it might be very small and the next two might be very strong. At the first 2 months were hell. Really strong anxiety, depression, muscles tension in the face and limbs, insomnia, wet dreams, temper so bad, that sometimes more funny than angry at myself, and all of them had its on sequence.
Right now I mostly feel constant anxiety and tension bu slightly more happier, headaches, better focus but an overall brain fog where its hard to focus visually on things that I'm looking at. Sleep is much better, with vivid dreams but still feel fatigued throughout the day. It's the anxiety thats bugging me. The question always arises is, when will it get better...?
I exercise a lot, always have been, eat healthy, and have a stable social life, no girlfriend, hanging out with friends and playing video games (not a hardcore gamer, play a few hours with friends every night).
My problem is that whenever I get really anxious and depressed, I search for information to calm me down, either here on other forums and that always helps and sort of puts me in that state that it's a process and will eventually end. I might add, I noticed my anxiety is very tied with withdrawal symptoms during the withdrawal. "My head hurts, I feel dizzy, something bad is about to happen to me." Stuff like that. I used to have some sort of fears in my childhood that tie back to me being afraid of something that might harm me, but it was never a thing that affected me negatively or impacted me in any way. It just came and went, never had any abnormal anxiety before it came out of nowhere while still using porn, and during the withdrawal. So while browsing the forums it never feels like it's something really related to my experience for some reason, since I had anxiety before starting the withdrawal process.
So the question is, have you have experience something like this where you become anxious while being a daily porn user? I would love to hear your overall experience if any of this what I said it related to you.