anxiety vs loneliness

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by need4realchg, May 10, 2019.

  1. Anyone ever get anxious because you fear you are going to be alone?
    Maybe your SO is going to the store and you have done everything to not be alone, because you know you are your worst enemy... but when they leave and the door clicks: Boom. Your mind goes into hyperdrive, anxiety mode and you have to make tough decisions under pressure.

    I travel a lot and have a bipolar response to being alone... either i love it, the quiet, no kids, no distractions, just enjoy my meals, and time alone OR I am on the prowl and mr. mac daddy just gonna get me some company no matter what, or how. Which can be a club to dance and get out my stress, or more dark dangerous options which leads to a sexual solution to an emotional void. what do you guys do that works?
    Last edited: May 10, 2019
  2. What works for me is remembering that everyone we know including ourselves are going to die anyway. It makes me want to appreciate the people I have around me without feeling attached and appreciate the fact that there be times I'll be alone anyway so might as well get on with my day now. I used to think of this as being negative, therefore turn to PMO and dwell on my loneliness after it, but it's actually a relief to accept that everyone will be alone at some point anyway so might as well get used to it and enjoy it.
  3. um, did I understand you right? You accept being alone by saying we will all die? This consoles you ?
  4. vapid

    vapid Fapstronaut

    You need to connect with real people and make real friends. But to do that you also have to be real with them and be genuine.

    Don't dwell on the negativity of solitude, but instead use the peace it brings to bring focus to yourself and making the right decisions. Just because you're alone does not mean you're lonely, you can always reach out to family and friends, if you have trouble doing that, then you need to find out why.
    need4realchg likes this.
  5. hardowner

    hardowner Fapstronaut

    I just trained myself not to care anymore. My mindset is that I will live alone and sometimes there will be someone with me. Swim or get drowned.
  6. Personally, I read. Even though the characters in the books that I'm reading aren't real, by engaging with their stories and identifying with them, I find that my general sense of loneliness evaporates. This is less effective when I'm at the beginning of a book (and just getting introduced to the characters) than at the end (when character arcs are completing), but I find it really satisfying nonetheless. I also don't think that it's books specifically that are important. Books, movies, video games, whatever, as long as I'm engaging with characters (and by extension, the authors), I'm eliminating a small piece of my loneliness.
    need4realchg likes this.
  7. Love this one. You reminded me I used to lose track of time as kid by reading. I want to get back into that amd put down the phone or Netflix. I will need to find a way to do that.

    This actually helps man, thank you honestly.
    RiverSmoothStone likes this.
  8. I'm glad to hear it! If you ever need recommendations, hit me up!
  9. Infrasapiens

    Infrasapiens Fapstronaut

    It may sound weird but I do that too. It doesn't really works but it is the last resort thought when absolutely everything is wrong.

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