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Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by MoWa96, Aug 25, 2019.
After 10 years of porn addiction ... Any advices on how to start and how to deal with craves?
Understand why it is truly vital you do not touch your penis and masturbate to pornography, truly grasp how damaging this affliction is to your health, wellbeing, relationships and every aspect of your life. Once your really understand this, you will not do this horrible shit.
Picture where you would like to be in 5 years time and the life you would like to lead and the type of man who is living this life. Understand this is achievable by removing this parasite from your life and not with it. Do your research, look at the horror stories of other people and cement in your mind how horrible this is.
Then incorporate the usual stuff you find on these forums, bring positive habits into your life... the things that support the rewiring of your neuro-circuitry. Start moving towards the man you would like to be.
Put urself once in the position of the video actor
I asked my self why always i see myself in reflection of my phone screen
Why im n't the hero in the film
After 15 yrs i realised that i deserve not to be just reflection
I deserve to exist in the real world
After u fall in ur 1st flatline u'll feel what"s im talkin about
U"ll leave ur girl
Hide in the bathroom
pmo. What a shame
To be honest, for being a porn addict for a decade you should be very kind to yourself during the process. What I mean is that it’s highly likely that you’ll have setbacks stopping something you’ve been doing for ten years cold turkey, it’s inevitable. So when those things happen don’t beat yourself up, it’s amazing that you’re trying and better to start now then later man.
I would say try smaller goals, instead of the entire 90 days right off the bat. Tell yourself to try to be free for two days for example, then once you do that try four days, then a week, etc. Taking baby steps, old habits die hard. This is my advice to you.
I used to be in that position.. acknowledge all the bad effects that porn induced on you, embrace them, and let them be the reason you won`t view porn again
Start reading about addiction everyday for half an hour, get rid of anything that triggers you, delete any porn you have. Set goals and work towards them.
Depending on the person, these two tips might be contradictory.
It's what I've started doing, and had minimal urges. I guess the best advice, is find what works for you and stick too it.
Don't worry about being addicted for 10 years. That's not all that long. I've been addicted to nearly daily compulsive binge MO for 25 and binge PMO for 17 years. If I managed to stop so can you. Some advice I wish I was given when I stepped on recovery path:
1. Find a reason why you wanna quit, write it on a paper and put it on the place where you see it every day… It must be strong enough it keeps you going when shit hits the fan.
2. Find out what led you to PMO addiction and address it. If you can't identify underlying issue, don't be afraid to seek professional help.
3. Embrace the pain in advance. Any change is uncomfortable, but getting rid of addiction means much higher level of discomfort as you'll have to battle with physiological (dopamine deficiency) as psychological effects on your mind and body. It gets better, but it will take time.
4. Slips and relapses are part of recovery process. Pick yourself up, learn from them and continue on your recovery path immediately. As long as you keep trying, you're on the right path. Shame and guilt have no place in your recovery. Look at slips and relapses as a lessons learned. Ask your self what caused you to slip, can I do something to prevent it from happening the next time.
5. Have an emergency plan in case of a slip. Mine looks like this -> Jul 16, 2019
6. Discipline, determination and patience.
Maybe some advice of this man can help you. He's been addicted to whatever you can imagine for 35 years and now he's addiction free for 3 years and is doing better then ever. He has more than 200 recovery videos on his YT channel. If you watch one every day you will be out of addiction rabbit hole by the time you see all his videos and they are truly worth watching even if you're not addicted:
7 Principles for Permanent Addictions Free Life and Happiness:
1. Gratitude (write a gratitude list and read it every morning)
2. Connection (spirituality, something greater than ourselves, God, Taoism - The Way, touch with nature)
3. Goals (setting daily, weekly and longer term goals, giving back)
4. Mindfulness and mindset (train your mind to live in a present moment, discipline, patience- daily work on yourself, pushing yourself - 5 minutes rule, determination-never give up, willpower -> achieved through meditation at least 10 min a day)
5. Forgiveness and kindness ((a)Forgive-> you have to lose resentment, anger, bitterness and (b) self-forgiveness -> you need to learn to like yourself! Be kind to others)
6. Diet (1st cut out processed food - anything in a packet and sugar, 3-4L hydration)
7. Exercise (at least 20 minutes walking outside a day and breathing-WIM HOF method)
IT'S NEVER TOO LATE TO BE WHAT YOU MIGHT HAVE BEEN, WHAT YOU CAN BE AND WHAT YOU WILL BE IF YOU FOLLOW THESE PRINCIPLES