Any Age Accountability Group

Discussion in 'Accountability Partners' started by Halibut, Apr 15, 2019.

  1. L1ster

    L1ster Fapstronaut

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    After a 6 day streak I relapsed. I am not happy about that, but that's just yet another reason for me to devote myself to self-improvement even more from this point on. I am going to now say, with complete confidence and dedication, that from this point on I am going to abstain for 90 days, then to infinity and beyond. Even if I might need to repeat this ought as much as hundreds or thousands times, I'll do it (although I am convinced this will not be necessary), and I'll always keep reaching towards my goals till I conquer them.

    Though I lost on the 3rd day of the No Nut March Challenge @Halibut I was absolutely up for it and would like to participate in similar events each month. It seems that I might be the first one but also hopefully the last one to loose this months challenge. Regardless, I am rooting for everyone else and wish that you all succeed. Reach for your goals!

    Regarding the Daylio app @Halibut I have used it in the past, and back then I found it quite useful. Yet another great app which serves a slightly different purpose is called Loop Habit Tracker. It is used to track and help establish positive daily habits. It can not only display habit streaks but also "habit strength" and "habit frequency". (Plus it is open-source which is all-around splendid).

    Also thank you @Journey to Resilience for linking that video, I found it very useful and enlightening. I have now started to follow the streak rule that 3 seconds of simply touching counts as relapse.
     
    Halibut likes this.
  2. Journey to Resilience

    Journey to Resilience Fapstronaut

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    3-3-20: Day 0
    • Relapsed recently. Mitigating my thoughts, specifically sexual thoughts, is a weakness of mine I need to work on. Does anyone have tips or suggestions to help control these thoughts? I would be open to cold showers and exercise, but I am currently sick.
    • I just downloaded Daylio. I might look into Loop Habit Tracker too.

    @L1ster
    For me personally, I count a relapse as watching P, completing M, or edging. As long as you aren't doing any of those things, you should be fine. And thank you for suggesting these apps. They look really useful!
     
    Last edited: Mar 3, 2020
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  3. Legit1

    Legit1 Fapstronaut

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    Damn... All I can tell you is that you have to look at your thoughts and urges as your brain pushing you to relapse, so you gotta be tougher and know that you won't let yourself be deceived. Your brain uses so many withdrawals during NoFap it ain't even funny. Urges, mood swings, depression, fatigue, irritability, inability to think straight, etc. The list goes on.

    It's best to get on the high horse as soon as possible and end this addiction once and for all instead of later
     
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  4. Halibut

    Halibut Fapstronaut

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    Hey @L1ster, thanks for being accountable to us and being honest about your relapse - it helps to draw a line in the sand and pick yourself up and carry on. There will be a no nut April challenge as well my friend.

    I will have to check out the 'loop habit tracker' and see if it will be more valuable - it sounds very useful! As I get further into this streak I am starting to want to work more on other areas of my life e.g. healthy eating, gym ect - that sounds a perfect app for it
     
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  5. Halibut

    Halibut Fapstronaut

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    I cant recommend meditation enough for helping control / divert sexual thoughts. It has been scientifically proven that meditation strengthens the prefrontal cortex of the brain which is responsible for rational thought

    If you dont have much experience with meditation, or you have found it hasnt been useful - give Bliss More a read as it changed my view and experience on meditation completely
     
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  6. SelfLoathingMillennial

    SelfLoathingMillennial Fapstronaut

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    Day 9 for me today. Got really tempted yesterday. It always gets tough for me around day 10 or so.
     
  7. SelfLoathingMillennial

    SelfLoathingMillennial Fapstronaut

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    Hello friends. I relapsed on day 9 due to edging. The site I used to frequent releases new videos every Friday so I find myself more curious than aroused. This leads to temptation and edging. Any recommendations on how to beat this?

    Thanks in advance!
     
  8. Journey to Resilience

    Journey to Resilience Fapstronaut

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    Does prayer and affirmations count as meditation? @Halibut
     
    Last edited: Mar 4, 2020
  9. SelfLoathingMillennial

    SelfLoathingMillennial Fapstronaut

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    And recommendations for prayerful meditation for starters? Any apps?
     
  10. Legit1

    Legit1 Fapstronaut

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    Checking in on day 44. Just when I thought I had a break from all these mood swings -- they return back. I thought I was feeling okay this morning, but I guess my brain has launched some more setbacks. 2 other pimples popped up, a rash full of circles popped up in my left wrist, and now the tiredness and feeling like trash has been set up. God I hate feeling like this... it's like I can't catch a break. And I know some of these symptoms are from NoFap because the idea of 'porn watching' has been popping up randomly since some hours ago. I'm not caving in or anything, but I felt like sharing to let you guys know where I'm at.

    Edit: The rash spot can be from a minor healing crisis since I'm detoxifying my body with herbs, just to fortify a bit of myself inside and all. Also just took another cold shower just to stabilize myself which worked greatly! I only take one cold shower, skip a day, and then take another cold shower the following day. Felt like I needed this one even though I took one yesterday
     
    Last edited: Mar 5, 2020
  11. Halibut

    Halibut Fapstronaut

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    Block the site! If it is creating frequent relapses and edging you have to think is going on this site worth it?

    This is the reason I had to get rid of instagram and snapchat , access to reddit ect
     
  12. Halibut

    Halibut Fapstronaut

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    They count as a meditative practice rather than a meditation - which is not to say they are not extremely useful!

    Meditation is a mind settling practice where you reduce the 'busy mind' and relax into a state where you brain waves become alpha waves - which are the waves produced when you sleep and therefore you are in deep rest

    Affirmations and prayer are an active thinking process, which can help reduce stress and are therefore meditative but not meditation - if that makes any sense haha?

    But affirmations and prayer are very powerful tools for promoting self-esteem, motivation and happiness - and something I want to get back into - especially affirmations as its sets your intent for the day
     
    L1ster likes this.
  13. Halibut

    Halibut Fapstronaut

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    Day 30 boys!!

    UPDATED LEADERBOARD
    1| @Narzisse (117) :emoji_trophy:
    2|
    @Legit1 (44) :emoji_medal:
    3| @Halibut (30)
    :emoji_military_medal:
    4| @pourover24 (27)
    5| @GKDOES (20)
    6| @Misha4blues97 (14)
    7| @Accountability Bud (13)
    8| @Vitabella (13)
    9| @L1ster (1)
    10| @Journey to Resilience (1)
    11| @Misty1984 (1)
    12| @FeelDark (1)

    13| @SelfLoathingMillennial
    (0)
    14| @31Jan2020 (?)

    *NO NUT MARCH CHALLENGE*

    Last man standing - relapse and you are out

    1| @Narzisse
    2| @Legit1
    3| @Halibut
    4| @pourover24
    5| @GKDOES
    6| @Misha4blues97
    7| @Accountability Bud
    8| @Vitabella
    9| @31Jan2020
    10| @FeelDark
     
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  14. L1ster

    L1ster Fapstronaut

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    Day 3:
    I don't know if this is worth sharing. But today in the afternoon I took a nap and I dreamed that I was browsing a P-site. In the dream I scrolled and looked at thumbnails, which thankfully did not feature nudity but rather only soft-core content — from what I remember at least. Have you ever experienced anything similar?

    Despite my subconscious, consciously I have more intent to abstain PMO than ever. Something that's helped me stay motivated are the "coomer" and "coombrain" memes. Especially a comedic animated video in which the protagonist and his PMO activity is greatly exaggerated and are voiced as if he was suffering from having an enormous kidney stone. I find many of those memes to be hilarious and they help increase my motivation by pointing out the misery and absurdity behind spending time on P & M. (Though beware that some individual instances or communities might occasionally display slightly provocative images or feature frequent political/social commentary — not that the latter one is anything to be afraid of).

    Lately I've felt that my mind is giving the basic act of abstaining PMO far to much attention, which is maybe what triggered the dream I had. To help combat this I plan on exploring meditation, occupy myself with other activities and probably tone down looking at memes.

    Anyways, at times I find it infuriating to know that my streak is so little. Which is because I feel impatient knowing that "a lot" of time will need to pass for it to grow. Hence something I've done is deduce how my streak will be at different future millstones. (E.g. summer holiday, Christmas or personal events).
     
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  15. Legit1

    Legit1 Fapstronaut

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    Day 46. So I've been feeling a bit better today, but one thing I've noticed is that I get short term, strong urges. I guess they're short term because I immediately dismiss them since I know they're pure deceit. Either way, I won't relapse because I know at the other side of a relapse lays regret, frustration, and just pure negativity.

    I used to think 'Hey, let's do 90 days and then relapse' but I now don't have that mindset anymore, I just want to keep on going until I feel a lot has changed and I'm a different person. If it takes a year or so, so be it. Better to start now than later.
     
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  16. Halibut

    Halibut Fapstronaut

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    Day 33

    I have been doing ok, very much into the complacent mindset kinda time frame - where you begin to forget why you are doing this in the first place

    I think it is because my moods are balancing out and I am starting to feel normal that I forget what the first week of a streak is like and the horrible withdrawals.

    I have noticed more benefits though - conversations are better, virtually little anxiety/ overthinking, struck up a conversation with a girl in a shop just because I could - speaking about myself without being asked

    Hope you guys are getting on well - no nut march is still ago!
     
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  17. Halibut

    Halibut Fapstronaut

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    These urges are insanely hard to deal with when they come - I know exactly what you are talking about @Legit1

    They have me crossing my legs! But getting out the house and away from the triggers and just like that they are gone - I have a feeling that these urges will come and go indefinitely and its learning how to deal with them which will be the deal breaker!
     
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  18. Halibut

    Halibut Fapstronaut

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    Hey @pourover24 congrats on making 1 month!!

    Also - this is the 1000'th post on the group!

    Leaderboard update:

    1| @Narzisse (121) :emoji_trophy:
    2|
    @Legit1 (47) :emoji_medal:
    3| @Halibut (33)
    :emoji_military_medal:
    4| @pourover24 (31)
    5| @GKDOES (23)
    6| @Misha4blues97 (17)
    7| @Accountability Bud (17)
    8| @Vitabella (16)
    9| @L1ster (5)
    10| @Misty1984 (5)
    11| @FeelDark (4)
    12|
    @SelfLoathingMillennial (4)
    13| @Journey to Resilience (1)
    14| @31Jan2020 (?)
    15|

    *NO NUT MARCH CHALLENGE*

    Last man standing - relapse and you are out

    1| @Narzisse
    2| @Legit1
    3| @Halibut
    4| @pourover24
    5| @GKDOES
    6| @Misha4blues97
    7| @Accountability Bud
    8| @Vitabella
     
    Last edited: Mar 8, 2020
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  19. L1ster

    L1ster Fapstronaut

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    Day 6. I'm almost at a week long streak! This is a small but important step on what might be either 90 days or forever. The first 3 days have been quite easy this time. Sometimes I find getting back into the challenge imminently after a relapse extra difficult, probably due to the Chaser Effect and a weakened will. But this time I was 100% set on keeping strong. It was only on the 4th day that I started getting significant urges and they have persisted till now. I managed to hold out but I know that this week might be extra challenging. This is because I am staying home alone for most of the day, throughout the entirety of the working week. Due to my current health, I cannot engage in exercise nor should I be taking cold showers. Neither is it recommended that I go out and meet others. Hence, in addition to my difficult situations the strategies available to me are limited.

    Due to this it is going to be extra difficult to hold out these upcoming days, but I do not want to use any challenging circumstance as a means to excuse a relapse. I do not know how I'll cope but I am dead set on doing so. I want to use this as an opportunity to prove to myself the strength of my will and discipline.

    At this very moment my urges are through the roof. I keep thinking about the things I don't want to be thinking about and it even caused me a small boner a moment ago. I do not know what I can do except to try and occupy my mind with a positive mental activity. Such as, this would be a great time to read that Bliss More book about meditation - but I haven't received it yet. Anyways, I'm gonna go do something relaxing or productive and give it my fullest attention.

    Edit:
    Don't worry about my health by the way. I just need to take some meds and I should be fine by next week.
     
    Last edited: Mar 9, 2020
  20. pourover24

    pourover24 Fapstronaut

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    @Halibut: Thanks so much man. It has been a journey - but continuing the fight each day. Congrats to you as well man - looking strong!
     
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