Anyone else have extreme spontaneous rage?

I have a long backstory, would prefer not to say it all unless it is needed. But I have been addicted to porn since I was 13 and am now 23. I gave up porn and am on day 75. I get anxious without knowing it. I mean this because I have all the signs, such a a tongue that fails on me to cloud in my brain, as well as trying to fight back worries from flooding my head, HOWEVER, I have no conscious thought that would be creating my anxiety.

Similarly I am extremely scared because occasionally (4 times) I have had extreme rage. It is controllable, but it is like an overwhelming desire to hurt whosoever in my line of sight. Sometimes similarly it does not have a reason.

I am the nicest guy, or at least was you'd ever meet. Now I feel so scarred that I can be getting along through my days and the rage might act up. I don't think I can have a family if it will be a long term thing for me. Nor friends, nor keep my girlfriend. I am worried. Sometimes worried about staying alive when I have these irrational rage filled thoughts.

I hope someone else would be able to tell me from their own experience that this is normal. Because if it isn't, I've yet to find a therapist with enough experience to tell me it will all be ok in the end.

 

I think personally, when I step back and think of it. I have a problem with understanding my own emotions or rationalizing/processing my thoughts. This has only ever happened when I stopped going to therapy. Never during.