Are you aloud to look at porn substitutes as long as your not masturbating?

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Bigwanker, Aug 18, 2019.

  1. Elihu

    Elihu Fapstronaut

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    So, I'm apparently addicted to P/sub. I don't like the "normal" stuff. You don't want to hitch a ride on this struggle bus.

    Best to reconnect with your partner if you have one or trade this for healthier habits like study, working out, or a different hobby, at least until you get control over your life.
     
  2. bigboibez

    bigboibez Fapstronaut

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    No.

    If youre on the internet and something pops up which you didn't go searching for, then simply close it and move on. no harm done.
    If you go searching for something, it is not a relapse, but it will increase the chance you relapse. ultimately the goal is to quit PMO, so why make it harder for yourself?

    People always seem to ask these questions, 'can I use p-subs' or 'I search for this every day' when they know they are deluding themselves. yes it is easier than staying completely abstinent but it will make it much harder to reach the goal of fully quitting. any artificial stimulation is going to at the best, not help, and at the worst, lead to binging, so why even bother?

    But, as I have already eluded to, this is a journey, not a hiscores contest. If you do relapse, or peek, pick yourself up and brush yourself off and keep going. If you peek, or even relapse, the absolute worst thing you can do is beat yourself to a pulp and binge. The idea isn't to get to a certain number of days, it is rather to design a lifestyle and move past PMOing for good.
     
    need4realchg likes this.
  3. ultrafabber

    ultrafabber Fapstronaut

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    Masturbation is not ok in any shape or form
     
  4. Bigwanker

    Bigwanker Fapstronaut

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    But what about just being on social media like facbook in general? Not to look for images to wank to, but rather to just keep in contact with people? But it seems if you look at images on a females profile on one of these sites that isn't good? Like what if a female you know posts pictures from a night out, or what ever? are you simply not aloud to look at the images just because there is women in the pictures? Do you switch your tv off if you see an attractive woman on the tv? I mean if this is the extent of this then to hell with that.

    I have friends who use tinder to meet women for hook ups and one night stands. One of my friends has been particularly successful getting laid a lot from using tinder. But should he stop using tinder because he is looking at pictures of females on it? It's like if you see a picture of a female look away, my eyes are burning it's a picture of a female. It's like a vampire seeing the sun, no no the light ahhhh. No no it's a picture of a female ahhhh noooo.

    I mean do you class looking at images of females or women on the tv a relapse? Simply looking at these things is a relapse?

    I'd class it as a relapse if I was wanking to these images, or if I was wanking to porn videos. But I'm not classing it as a relapse simply from looking at a female on a screen.
     
  5. Tibo87

    Tibo87 Fapstronaut

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    @Bigwanker

    Two separate things here:

    On the only exception that you would like to become a monk and retire to a monastery, yes, you can look at women, either online or in real Life. This is not a relapse. But as you said, if you masturbate or fantasize and have an orgasm doing it, this is considered a relapse.

    The reason why the others advice you to not do it, it is because it can trigger very quickly an urge to go to PMO. The porn and social media industry use very similar codes to get us addicted.

    Bottom line is: you can look at girls, but by doing so, you increase your risk of relapsing or not attain your goals. So it is up to you to draw the line.

    Stay strong and stay happy!
     
  6. Stug

    Stug Fapstronaut

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    lmfao stop searching a way out ....
    girl naked or girl semi naked

    all potential triggers
     
    Pedro costa likes this.
  7. bigboibez

    bigboibez Fapstronaut

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    No, you're missing the point.

    If you are just using social media to talk to people or whatever, then that clearly has nothing to do with nofap.

    If you are on females profiles... that is not something to be proud of. You're not gaining anything from lurking on girls' profiles.

    What I am trying to say is, don't go LOOKING for artificial sexual stimulation. If you're on social media and you're not searching for girls or provocative pictures to get u slightly horny so you can masturbate, then no issue. but if you go on facebook/instagram etc deliberately searching for a girl then you have a problem.

    I think you already know what you can and cant do. anything that seems too good to be true, usually is. you need to be honest with yourself and think 'is what im doing beneficial to nofap?'
     
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  8. psychedelicjelly

    psychedelicjelly Fapstronaut

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    I've been addicted to dating apps, chat rooms whatever you can find. Those things didn't classify as porn but they had the exact same effect on me.

    I would spend hours or whole days on them just trying to get off.
     
    need4realchg likes this.
  9. When you say get off do you mean disconnect ? Like delete your account or get off = bust a nut?
     
  10. psychedelicjelly

    psychedelicjelly Fapstronaut

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    Bust a nut unfortunately and these days more like trying to stop using them
     
  11. Yeah. I know this struggle. It freaking sucks. It takes me several tries to rid myself of these things.
     
  12. King Tut

    King Tut Fapstronaut

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    no. i did NoFap for 1 year with watching porn evry now n then before. and after a year i relapsed. it didnt help me compared to not watching porn.

    NoFap NO PORN or it doesn't count. sorry.
     
    need4realchg likes this.

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