Attraction now gone with PA

Discussion in 'Partner Support' started by Healmyheart, Aug 24, 2018.

  1. Healmyheart

    Healmyheart Fapstronaut

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    Did your attraction for your partner ever stop. I have honestly got to the point right now, where he is repulsing me and I have no desire to be with him. That has happened in previous relationships for other reasons and I've never got it back. I'm still here but not sure why anymore. I don'teven want him to touch me. I don't have any desire or feel anything sexually towards him
     
  2. Queenie%Bee

    Queenie%Bee Fapstronaut

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    Yes but it only lasted for a short time after each DDAY big or small , small maybe a few days , big one like a week I would just look at him like a stranger not so much “repulsed”
     
  3. A new day

    A new day Fapstronaut

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    It goes up and down for me. He can be hard to live with sometimes. Other times he can be attractive. Anytime I suspect he’s PMO I get turned off. I get turned off when I feel objectified. Mostly because I don’t want to be classified with the porn women he faps to.
     
    Jennica likes this.
  4. Atomicflea

    Atomicflea Fapstronaut

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    The attraction to my husband has dimmed a bit. I believe it’s a knock on effect from the betrayal trauma, the loss of trust, low self esteem especially with my post pregnancy body but I also feel that something has broken inside of me after d-day #3. I love my husband like I would a family member but I am unsure if I still love him romantically. (He knows this too) It’s all a bit muddled up. He and I are starting to see therapists next week and I’m giving him a chance but he knows that one more goddamn lie and I’m gone with our newborn son.
     
    Reverent and Queen_Of_Hearts_13 like this.
  5. BetrayedMermaid

    BetrayedMermaid Fapstronaut

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    I see my husband as a stranger sometimes. He has shown me much love since Dday and has worked very hard in recovery but admittedly, something is not there that was before Dday. I don't know him, I don't trust him. Sometimes I look at him and I can see the man I love and am so attracted to him and sometimes, just feel disgusted and repulsed and my chest literally feels crushed when I look at him. I feel like I have a split personality on this one.
     
  6. Love_rules50

    Love_rules50 Fapstronaut

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    I think a big part of attraction is feeling safe with that person. If you no longer feel safe, he becomes the enemy and kills attraction. Re-building the trust, talking openly about how you feel, and ultimately feeling safe with him again may bring the attraction back.
     
  7. tammygeorge

    tammygeorge Fapstronaut

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    My attraction is still there. I’m dying for my husband affection in bed. Either he is a PA or not attracted to me. I’m starting to feel numb. I’m sick to my stomach 98% of the time. I wish it would turn to hate and disguest. I feel pathetic to hold on to something thats just not there.
     
  8. havana19

    havana19 Fapstronaut

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    Yes this happened to me with the last partner I had. I went cold after finding the porn and it just never came back. Like a door slamming and locking and it simply couldn't be opened again.
     

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