Attraction now gone with PA

Discussion in 'Partner Support' started by Healmyheart, Aug 24, 2018.

  1. Healmyheart

    Healmyheart Fapstronaut

    Did your attraction for your partner ever stop. I have honestly got to the point right now, where he is repulsing me and I have no desire to be with him. That has happened in previous relationships for other reasons and I've never got it back. I'm still here but not sure why anymore. I don'teven want him to touch me. I don't have any desire or feel anything sexually towards him
  2. Queenie%Bee

    Queenie%Bee Fapstronaut

    Yes but it only lasted for a short time after each DDAY big or small , small maybe a few days , big one like a week I would just look at him like a stranger not so much “repulsed”
  3. A new day

    A new day Fapstronaut

    It goes up and down for me. He can be hard to live with sometimes. Other times he can be attractive. Anytime I suspect he’s PMO I get turned off. I get turned off when I feel objectified. Mostly because I don’t want to be classified with the porn women he faps to.
    Jennica likes this.
  4. Atomicflea

    Atomicflea Fapstronaut

    The attraction to my husband has dimmed a bit. I believe it’s a knock on effect from the betrayal trauma, the loss of trust, low self esteem especially with my post pregnancy body but I also feel that something has broken inside of me after d-day #3. I love my husband like I would a family member but I am unsure if I still love him romantically. (He knows this too) It’s all a bit muddled up. He and I are starting to see therapists next week and I’m giving him a chance but he knows that one more goddamn lie and I’m gone with our newborn son.
    Reverent and Queen_Of_Hearts_13 like this.
  5. BetrayedMermaid

    BetrayedMermaid Fapstronaut

    I see my husband as a stranger sometimes. He has shown me much love since Dday and has worked very hard in recovery but admittedly, something is not there that was before Dday. I don't know him, I don't trust him. Sometimes I look at him and I can see the man I love and am so attracted to him and sometimes, just feel disgusted and repulsed and my chest literally feels crushed when I look at him. I feel like I have a split personality on this one.
  6. I think a big part of attraction is feeling safe with that person. If you no longer feel safe, he becomes the enemy and kills attraction. Re-building the trust, talking openly about how you feel, and ultimately feeling safe with him again may bring the attraction back.
  7. tammygeorge

    tammygeorge Fapstronaut

    My attraction is still there. I’m dying for my husband affection in bed. Either he is a PA or not attracted to me. I’m starting to feel numb. I’m sick to my stomach 98% of the time. I wish it would turn to hate and disguest. I feel pathetic to hold on to something thats just not there.
  8. havana19

    havana19 Fapstronaut

    Yes this happened to me with the last partner I had. I went cold after finding the porn and it just never came back. Like a door slamming and locking and it simply couldn't be opened again.

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