Hi friends, I'm 25 years old from Germany and here's my story: I started to fap at the age of 10 or so and turned to porn as I was 14 years old, because I was able to access the internet without restrictions. The first half year I consumed it three times a month or so, but then I had my first lovesickness, because I fell in love with a person which didn't love me. I started to consume porn more and more, it got really extreme at the age of 17, where I fapped 2 days in a row for 3 to 4 hours and then had to take a break, because my dick hurted so bad. Over the years, the material didn't get harder, but I needed more and more material to get to the same high as before. At the age of 21 I noticed that I have a problem with porn because I read the first time about porn addiction. Since then I tried to stay abstinent (more or less) and I was (more or less) successful. There were times in which I didn't care about the negative effects and indulged a lot. And then there were other times in which I managed to stay clean from porn, my maximum was about 2 months I think. Besides porn sites I was also involved in Tumblr and different dating platforms, mainly seeking for hot pictures but also sex. I clearly know that beating this addiction can take time. In the past years I solved some personal problems which always led me to relapsing, because I want to numb the upcoming pain. Nevertheless there are still some problems standing in my way, but I still want to give it a new try and to involve in the NoFap forum. Until now I mostly tried to stay away from porn but fapped (at least in the cases where I had the desire to do so, without porn I don't fap that often). Now I want to try NoFap in the hard mode, starting today. Let's see what happens. Here's why I want to stay away from porn: My porn consume steals a lot of time and energy, which I could use more beneficial. In the past months I started to do sports, to achieve more wellbeing, health and to shape my body. Since some days I started to record Let's Play videos for YouTube, nothing big, I just want to have some fun entertaining the people and to develop myself, especially to develop my voice. That wouldn't be possible, if I stay attached to porn. I want to be a positive and energetic person and not that weak person I am right now. Concerning sex: I want to have a loving relationship and sex with my beloved person. No more stranger hookups which can be hot, but my heart needs more than just fun. Now I will open up my journal and give you updates of my process. See you later.