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Hi friends,
I'm 25 years old from Germany and here's my story:

I started to fap at the age of 10 or so and turned to porn as I was 14 years old, because I was able to access the internet without restrictions. The first half year I consumed it three times a month or so, but then I had my first lovesickness, because I fell in love with a person which didn't love me. I started to consume porn more and more, it got really extreme at the age of 17, where I fapped 2 days in a row for 3 to 4 hours and then had to take a break, because my dick hurted so bad. Over the years, the material didn't get harder, but I needed more and more material to get to the same high as before. At the age of 21 I noticed that I have a problem with porn because I read the first time about porn addiction. Since then I tried to stay abstinent (more or less) and I was (more or less) successful. There were times in which I didn't care about the negative effects and indulged a lot. And then there were other times in which I managed to stay clean from porn, my maximum was about 2 months I think.

Besides porn sites I was also involved in Tumblr and different dating platforms, mainly seeking for hot pictures but also sex.

I clearly know that beating this addiction can take time. In the past years I solved some personal problems which always led me to relapsing, because I want to numb the upcoming pain. Nevertheless there are still some problems standing in my way, but I still want to give it a new try and to involve in the NoFap forum.

Until now I mostly tried to stay away from porn but fapped (at least in the cases where I had the desire to do so, without porn I don't fap that often). Now I want to try NoFap in the hard mode, starting today. Let's see what happens.

Here's why I want to stay away from porn:

My porn consume steals a lot of time and energy, which I could use more beneficial. In the past months I started to do sports, to achieve more wellbeing, health and to shape my body. Since some days I started to record Let's Play videos for YouTube, nothing big, I just want to have some fun entertaining the people and to develop myself, especially to develop my voice. That wouldn't be possible, if I stay attached to porn. I want to be a positive and energetic person and not that weak person I am right now.

Concerning sex: I want to have a loving relationship and sex with my beloved person. No more stranger hookups which can be hot, but my heart needs more than just fun.

Now I will open up my journal and give you updates of my process.

See you later.

 

Hello there...
Welcome to the community!

 

You still realised it at a young age.

Yes. I personally advise people to think of it like weight training. You get better at it with time and hard work. And your streaks start becoming longer and longer with time.

After all, if you can't stay clean for the whole year, it's still better to stay clean 300 days out of 365 days in an year. Progress is progress, even if you hit speedbumps now and then.

 

Thank you DudeAlex and WOOF, it's nice to be welcomed so nicely

Thankfully I haven't lost that much until now. Mainly time and energy. I had some relapses at work, but thankfully nobody noticed, because I am working very self-reliant and my boss isn't looking over my shoulder all the time.

On the other hand: You never know what beautiful things you have never seen, because of your addiction.

True words. It's about trading bad habits for good habits. But when you change too much, you will fall back into old patterns. So it's better to see the whole thing as long-term challenge.