Hear Hear @mumchance ! Well said! I agree with you that addicts do not "deserve" a significant other. Though there are many definitions for deserve, one of them is "am entitled to." No person is entitled to another person - that attitude is ownership - and it is the inner addict talking when we feel entitled to something. When we truly focus on the reboot we become a better person who has more to share with others in our life. When we can open ourselves up and share who we are with another person without feeling like we deserve or are entitled to a particular response from that person we become vulnerable - which the inner addict is afraid of. But that is exactly why we need to focus on the reboot and not on seeking fulfillment from another person.