BEAT YOUR LONGEST STREAK

Short term= Day 3/7
Long term= Day 45/38

 

17/90

 

16/207

 

Short term= Day 4/7
Long term= Day 46/38

 

0/90 unfortunately

 

0/47

I’ve been binging. Poppers arrived in the post less than an hour ago and I sniffed them whilst watching P. I’ve now thrown them in the bin. My pied is so bad I just wore a tourniquet around my penis in order to maintain an erection whilst watching P. My addiction is beginning to spiral out of control again. I forgot how badly this addiction affects me and how it feels to stoop low.

 

No M or O
Short term= Day 6/7
Long term= Day 48/38

No P:
Day 0/30 (start 6pm 10th August 2022)

My counter is now essentially just for not completely relapsing/resetting ( I have looked at P but have been trying to keep it to a minimum.

I will probably start a separate counter for P looks as need to stop completely.

 

No M or O:
Short term= Day 0/7
Long term= Day 0/49

No P:
Day 0/30 (start 12th August 2022)

 

253/730
I was absent some days I did another 7 days water fast and wanted to focused on that. Everything good, no urges and mind very sharp and focused.

"If devil is not tempting you, worry because it means he has you hooked, but if he is tempting you be glad because it means you are doing something good and he doesn't like it"

Denzel Washington

 

3/47

I again realise that I must take this one day at a time. Thinking too far ahead overwhelms me and leaves me with thoughts such as this is too difficult, or “just one last time”, not before long I’m back to watching transwoman, sissy hypno, paying for femdom videos and ordering poppers. I’m almost 40 yrs old and I’m addicted. I can’t even imagine myself having intercourse anymore, knowing how badly I’m affected by pied. I know this will more than likely be reversed through abstinence, yet I’ve been finding it so difficult to get going again. I’ve built a prison cell and I’m the only person that can forge the key to freedom. Oh how I want to break free (pardon the queen reference). I’ve stopped taking cold showers so it’s time to reintroduce them, and also meditation. My eating habits are poor and I’m getting little to no exercise, this needs addressing. Socially I’ve returned to being awkward, and become anti-social, preferring not to leave the house and have to interact with people face to face.

I’ve recently been contemplating our existence. Thinking there must be more to it than just this one life that we live here on this planet. I believe there’s something greater, yet I believe no one knows what it is. Which makes me think this may be a test of some sort. So it matters what we do with our lives. If we can overcome our porn addictions, this may be one of our life’s greatest achievements. If you’ve read this far I’d be interested to know your thoughts and opinions about life’s meaning or lack of meaning and if there’s something greater than us.

 

Take it one step at a time brother. I find it difficult to have deep life understandings when one hits rock bottom deep into ones delusional addiction.

Taking care of your health is a good step to starters.

In terms of life I believe life has its own magic just see animals they are happy by simply living. It's our rational mind mixed with our primitive brain that get us in trouble creating wants and needs that aren't real such as sex and love.

Take away any illusions out of your mind and you'll see you don't need anything to be happy you have the all universe in you.

Simply living in the moment just like a cat, but wiser as a human, you'll see life is not as complex.

Start to work out again and do some meditation to start to get a grip of this natural state and porn will fade gradually

 

No M or O:
Short term= Day 1/7
Long term= Day 1/49

No P:
Day 1/30 (start 12th August 2022)

 

22/207

 

08/24

 

No M or O:
Short term= Day 3/7
Long term= Day 3/49

No P:
Day 3/30 (start 12th August 2022)

 

Relapsed back to day 0

No M or O:
Short term= Day 0/7
Long term= Day 0/49

No P:
Day 0/30 (start 16th August 2022)

 

Im in
-August 15 2022-