beautiful sex and dirty drive feedback anyone?

for me it’s majorly important to discover all these truths.
I had all life long as I can see now two sex lifes. I have a strong drive and I had many women. But I lived with them the beautiful side. Also very passionate and loving and intense and beautiful. Satisfying beautiful sex. Nevertheless there was a second side that lived all the ugly dirty drive driven by low motives. I judged the low one and did not identify with it.
This is the part that lived porn and prostitutes even when I had satisfying good sex. I never understood. At some point the ugly perverted one took over and with it I fell deeply. I now understand that this was a integration of something I have that then took years to do.

Does anyone Know something like this? I made a lot of liberating experiences and start now to understand what happened.

 

I truly find that the ugly part I’d falling off and the good beautiful one is coming through again. I think it’s the many yearsefforts and processing of the themes that makes a shift possible. It has a lot to do with endurance to combat PMO.