Becoming a bit desperate about my DE case. Please help.

Discussion in 'Rebooting in a Relationship' started by LuckyLuke1996, Jan 16, 2020.

  1. LuckyLuke1996

    LuckyLuke1996 New Fapstronaut

    Hey everyone

    I (23M) have never had an orgasm from sex. I started to fap to porn at around age 14, never used too tight of a grip, but it definitely messed up my brain a bit.

    What made things worse is that I developed a sort of addiction to taking speed or mdma (amphetamines) and having long wanking sessions where I would edge constantly, sometimes taking up to 10 hours to finish. There was a time, and holy hell I'm not proud of it, where this would happen every weekend.

    The last time I did such a long fapping session is also the last time that I fapped alltogether, I'm on a 100+ day streak now. At about day 70, I met my current Girlfriend. The reason I started nofap was because I knew I had Delayed Ejaculation, and also reduced sensitivity on my penis.

    My girlfriend is absolutely gorgous, a straight up 10 in my books. She's hot, funny, cute, and I feel comfortable around her.

    Only problem is; I still cannot finish inside her, even without condoms (she has the spiral). This is becoming more and more conserning to me since I already knew I had this condition before, but assumed it was because I didn't find all my previous parters that attractive.

    Now I am convinced that my Delayed Ejaculation problem comes from those hour long edging sessions.

    I wonder if there is any other technique other than just stopping masturbating and porn all together, which wasn't that hard for me to do anyways. I've been thinking about training my dick and brain to be more sensitive by masturbating only to imaginating my girlfriend.

    PLEASE, if anyone here has any recomandations on what I should do, besides don't fap, please let me know! I don't take any medications, I don't have psychological problems, I just wanna be able to cum inside the girl I love.

    Lastly, I just signed up on this forum, I hope you're all doing well.
    Sorry for my not so perfect English.
    Greetings from Switzerland :)
  2. JustADude

    JustADude Fapstronaut

    I've never had a problem ejaculating. You get hard, can go on forever, but are unable to ejaculate?

    Does your failure to ejaculate bother your girlfriend? Maybe because she feels like she is unable to please you?

    Is it an option to accept your DE and see it as a super power. And then, one day if you end up ejaculating, it will be a nice surprise?

    Do you orgasm, but do not ejaculate?

    Sounds like your long edging sessions probably are having a lasting effect, it is probably not permanent. You might want to see a doctor though, it might be something physiological. Now that I am almost 40, I am finally getting aches and pains that take a year to fully go away, and some that are here to stay, I am learning to live with small oddities and ailments, you might have to do the same.
  3. Galaxian21

    Galaxian21 Fapstronaut

    I am 15 days without porn or M to O. I have had sexual intercourse with my SO several times during this period (I’m not giving up O with her). Before starting NoFap I had some obvious DE and PIED issues from edging and PMO. The first week of my “program” was rough, I still had ED and DE symptoms as I refused to use porn as stimulation/motivation. I was with my girl on day 14 and had no DE issues whatsoever—I didn’t last 3 minutes after foreplay. Woke up a few hours later to her caressing me, and still no issues finishing a second time. Stay the course and trust the process, retrain your brain to want only your SO in that way. And be thankful that you have a sexual outlet to see your progress unlike many here.
    Last edited: Jan 19, 2020
    JustADude likes this.
  4. Faceplanter

    Faceplanter Fapstronaut

    Congratulations on the girlfriend who is attend! DE is probably from those long edging sessions, yes. But, since you are doing well on avoiding pmo, I doubt there's much you can do other than just wait for your body to adjust. I am assuming that everything feels good but there is just no O. Also, you wrote no O inside of her... Does that mean there is a O by other means?

    The biggest issue with DE would typically be her response. If it is a big issue for her, and I gather that is often the case, then I would try and make sure you express your pleasure during intercourse with lots of verbal cues.

    I hope this isn't a problem much longer.
    Last edited: Jan 26, 2020
    JustADude likes this.

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