Becoming the Coder I always wanted to be

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by NVG94, Jun 25, 2020.

  1. NVG94

    NVG94 Fapstronaut

    almost 5 yrs ago I had a dream of becoming a programmer , I came to a new country to study software engineering, But the circumstances were tough and with the shedule I had i barely passed all the papers and got the degree, I was not the person I wanted to be after 3 years of studying. I did some work but didnt retain much all the while doing PMO with the busy schedule (2 part time jobs + 3 to 4 papers a semester) I was overwhelmed with work. I would find my relief in pMO and also I have Masturbated anywhere ive been in toilets in uni in restaurants , anywhere ive been to , im sure I have masturbated at least once (sorry for being too explicit) I was lucky to get a job which is slightly oriented towards web development but its not coding ( while I have the job title I want) the real job is 2% coding 98% design , so i am here sitting after 5 years of setting my goal to be a fullstack developer , and still running around with feelings of loneliness, and I dont have the JOB I want and I dont know if I am too late to start. But I am determined that if i didnt quit trying then I am not a real failure, so on the day one of my reboot I plan to study 5hrs then I will let you guys know after doing the 5 hrs how i feel etc. but for now god bless you everyone.! I am happy I have recognized my issue and addressing it, and thanks for being a support
  2. L3t'sG0

    L3t'sG0 Fapstronaut

    Hello! Hope you're having quite a day today.

    It seems you're overworked and feeling like a failure and a loner. Yet, you're changing yourself and that's a good thing. That means believe you can succeed and you will succeed. Belief is a powerful thing, a very manipulative thing but nevertheless has saved countless lives from despair.

    Some tips for you.

    Easy tip
    They say the best efficient, productive "work session" is 52 minutes of work and 17 minutes of break time. I don't know where exactly the scientific studies are about this but trust me that they're there if you can find it. This will help you work at your best while leaving you enough rest to get back on top of your game.

    Medium tip
    Do you exercise? It makes a lot of people not feel like a failure and that's feeling all that matters to be on the right track (assuming you're not egotistical). On reddit for r/bodyweight fitness, there's a thing called the recommenced routine. It a learning curve but as long as you put little effort each day, you will find yourself on the right track.

    Medium tip
    What do you want out of a relationship? Are you fine with friends or do you want that significant other? The best advice for relationships is not from others but comes from you and your potential partner. Always learn to grow, each and both to perfection and you'll have a very happy life.

    Take each tip one at a time. Never quit studying, it's a gift of life. Stay curious. Live life.
    Signing out
  3. :)-keepsmiling

    :)-keepsmiling Fapstronaut

    Way to go mate!!!!!
    NVG94 likes this.
  4. NVG94

    NVG94 Fapstronaut

    Hey thanks for this. Regarding your tip 2 , I think i will actually have to do some work on this . I also had a hernia surgery and not feeling quiet fit yet to do some exercise. But I do walk , is there anything else that can be a substitute to this. Thanks!

    Tip 3 regarding relationships , im single since birth haha. Although I have seen others in relationships going through fun/not-so fun scenarios I have no idea how it will look like in my life . I experience a chronic loneliness time to time, today not so much. I am focused on my self-improvement then .. relationships. So im trying my best to make it to the other side single.
  5. NVG94

    NVG94 Fapstronaut

    Day 02. I totally slept after work woke up to day morning. This is because I didn’t wanna face my reality and loneliness. It’s 4:30 pm and I still can’t find my drove to study any tips guys ?
  6. Hi there!

    I've been coding for the last 20 years and been interested in electronics for the last 30 years (I'm 37). I can relate to your feelings in your first post quite much! Although we've had some different paths in life, we share a few common ones but I don't want to be to explicit about which ones ;)

    If you work as a fullstack developer (with design most of the part), I understand that you feel tired when you come home, it's quite natural... if you've been working the whole day in front of a computer, it's quite hard to come home and then continue working in front of your computer and still be productive. That's at least what I think and if I force myself too much I will just find it hard to sleep because I can't get my mind in a restful state. This is where exercise helps a lot, however. I would recommend something else besides walking. It's a wonderful and refreshing sensation to sweat as often as possible! This will help you a lot with your loneliness and it will make your mind come into a better state for learning new things. Do whatever exercise you can that will make you sweat and do it outdoors. Being outdoors will make you feel less lonely, and the while session will feel more refreshing. Have the courage to end the workout with a cold shower! That will make you feel like a new person. :)

    So that's step one, get more exercise that will make your heart pump.

    Step two would be to find out what inspires you to become a good programmer (if you don't know that yet). Find out where the driving force comes from and what type of feeling and circumstances that got you hooked on this type of skill. I would recommend some meditation for this, especially this one:

    Following the "why what how" model, now when you know the why, you can start work on the what. What are you going to delve into? Find inspiration around the why to find a topic or project that will make you go in the right direction. Then work on the how. Get some pen and paper and sketch the different parts and split down everything in smaller and smaller pieces. When the pieces have become so small that you feel like doing them right away, you're exactly in the right place to start do some work!

    When you've done the things above, it's going to be an easy matter to put everything aside and go to your job, then after you come home and have done some exercise, you work a bit on your project because now you know exactly what to do, where this will lead you and why you do this.

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