1. Welcome to NoFap! We have disabled new forum accounts from being registered for the time being. In the meantime, you can join our weekly accountability groups.
    Dismiss Notice

been pretty lonely all along

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by kumarach, Jun 24, 2021.

  1. kumarach

    kumarach Fapstronaut

    as a person i've been pretty lonely since quite some time now.as a kid of 14 i was blamed for molestation and was left alone by all my friends my parents don;t really trust me coz of another such incident,to cover my emptiness i got into porn coz it made me feel satisfied for a momentary portion of time.no friends no one to talk to. i fell so deep into porn in the first 5 days and by 2nd week i was an addict. i knew it coz i used to carry my cell everywhere and watch it whenever possible.
    about the past,my friend(ex friend should i say) used to have a crush on the same girl as me.so one fine day he went and told her that i wanted to fuck her.......yess he said that ...at the age of 14........I AS A PERSON WOULD ANT TO FUCK a person......seriously?,didn't even know what sex was until 15 coz i was a loner and pretty much into myself.he did so to get me out of the way.neverthelss,i got into a beautiful relationship with a girl.everything was fine till one day i lied.(she wasn't studying properly and i wanted her to focus on that).she left me(fair enough).leaving me all alone again,she was the one who had helped me overcome my depression and anxiety which i had been fighting since i the incident mentioned above,i was self medicating myself with alprax and pain pills.

    had got on a dating app recently and was talking to this beautiful woman(a russian doctor.) we were pretty much in love until one day i asked for nudes,gues why??my brain had been conditioned to porn all along.
    i've been searching love since a kid,been misunderstood by ,many and my helping nature has been exploited by a lot many people.i plan to come out a better person out of this,but never again will i fall in love.hobbies and hardwork seem to fill gaps and personal achievements seem better to pursue.

    this entire bullshing took a new turn 3 days back when i was diagnosed with a level 3 schizophrenia. the doctor gave me 12 yrs .i'm 18 rn.i just want to get over this addiction and see myself as a better person before i pass away. the guilt of hurting so many people doe't really go away that easy......
     
    Toni7 likes this.
  2. Diet, exercise, hobbies, and good mental health care are the general guidelines for getting over a porn addiction. The most useful thing you can do is gain control over your mind and discover your purpose.
     
    Buddhabro likes this.
  3. kumarach

    kumarach Fapstronaut

    tysm for telling me this,this is exactly what i needed to hear today,had a pretty bad relapse
     
  4. CAKCy

    CAKCy Fapstronaut

    145
    399
    63
    born3 likes this.

Share This Page