Best line for splitting the bill?

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by Tankus, Dec 29, 2018.

  1. Tankus

    Tankus Fapstronaut

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    So usually I get through the situation of splitting the bill pretty smoothly. Especially in Australia, women are generally quite decent and understanding of that. Usually I will say that I believe in equality within the relationship and that I don't want to set a precedent etc, but I feel like it might be justifying it too much.

    So what I'm wondering is, do you have any simple lines that make it clear that's what yo believe but in a fun, joking smooth way?

    Cheers friends, much love <3
     
  2. Dutch treat?

    But I also like how you put it.
     
  3. Be a man and pay!

    You never split the bill. Now there will be times she offers to pay, that’s good.

    But never split the bill.
     
  4. Tankus

    Tankus Fapstronaut

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    I strongly disagree with this based on the facts above. You are setting a precedent in the relationship right from the start that you she is privileging you with her time, when it's actually both, a mutual exchange. I believe in the mutual reciprocity. I genuinely think if you keep this attitude of "be a man" you will find women that trap you into that profile and stereotype of being a "man" and they will be entitled to that. If that's what you want that's fine some guys are like that, I'd rather a more genuine, open relationship based on communication and not pre-determined beliefs and expectations.
     
    Ra's Al Ghul likes this.

  5. You got a good heart.

    Ok, if you want to be friends with her split the bill..if you want a romantic relationship then pay.

    It’s simple.

    You are trying to show her you are a suitable mate.

    You are not equal..fk this gender neutral soy stuff that’s rampant in society.

    Girls want a man not a friend.

    They want some one who is assertive and takes charge.

    Not a jerk mind you, but a man.

    But you are confusing being a good guy with being this “soy” version. Look up Paul Watson’s videos on Chad he posted a week or so ago.

    Plus if you ask her out you should pay, it’s the courteous and respectful thing to do.

    Heck if I ask a friend out sometimes I pay.

    I’m being harsh on here because I care bro.

    I have tons of experience on this..tons.
     
  6. In reading more, and of Caesar's comments, I tend to be "old fashioned" and if it's the first date, I pay the bill.
    He brought up a good point that if you initiated the date, or courting her, then you should pay. She may even like it in that some women
    are now liking the attention and benefits of being treated like a women, special and set apart, and not just one of the guys?
    Ask her what she thinks about it?

    lol..neutral soy stuff
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  7. Tankus

    Tankus Fapstronaut

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    Yeah interesting points, duly noted. However the past five dates have been women inviting me out, and that's usually how I steer things to happen.
    Caesar does make some good points though.
    I had a good convo once with one of my close friends who is a psychologist, and she said that she would always split the bill and never allow the man to pay, because she felt that as soon as she let that happen that it was like he had some power over her. And I'm inclined to agree with that.
    I think the type of woman I'm looking for is not some weak housewife, but an intelligent woman who understands mutual benefit and reciprocity.

    On top of that, all the best women I have ever met and all the best dates I have been on, it has been a very comfortable mutual understanding of splitting the bill. It's nice. And the ones that haven't, it has been the biggest red flag. The ones that have been triggered by me not paying for them, have in all other aspects of their character been very entitled, selfish humans. Just my experience.
     
  8. My goodness, some good points from both sides. Nice follow up post, Tankus.
     
  9. I think you pay the bill and she treats you like a leader. Also she's responsible for the housework.
     
  10. Oh, oh..here we go ;) :)
     
  11. Unibet

    Unibet Fapstronaut

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    It's pretty simple.

    You ask her out you pay.

    She asks you out she pays.

    You don't invite me to your house to watch TV and I bring my own TV. That's just weird.

    So if you tell her Saturday night get ready we are going out, then pay. If she wants to pay then WIFE her direct.
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  12. Look up Way of the Superior Man by David Deida.

    It will teach you about polarity..without polarity( masculinity and feminity polarity) you could end up in a relationship with your best friend, equal but you will have no passion with her.

    That’s why people end up cheating, lack of passion.,one reason anyway.

    Just think of how popular 50 Shades of Grey was..that’s a clue..women are craving for assertiveness because it’s so lacking now. Set yourself apart from the new masses and you will be a stud, hahahahaha.

    Another problem with being too meek, it could turn into an abusive relationship where you are the one being emotionally abused by the woman because she over dominates you.

    Or that cuck thing..still not sure what that is but I think it is the highest form of soyness from what I can tell..you don’t want your girl wanting to sleep with someone else and be like ...ok.

    Ok this really is a rant.

    Ok rule..don’t buy a girl you are trying to pick up a drink at a bar..that I admit is weak.

    If a girl wants to pay when you go out, first say I got this..if she Insists then say thank you and let her.

    Your psychologist is wrong..I know the kind of girl you want, I was married to one.. you can’t be soy to get that kind of girl. If she is smart and successful then she won’t settle for a weak man and she doesn’t want to “be the man”..which if you split the bill or have her pay you are treating her like. she already had to “be like a man” in the real world..she wants to be treated like a lady when she is on a date, because she is one.
     
  13. Tankus

    Tankus Fapstronaut

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    Actually listening to that David Deida book at the moment hahaha

    Yeah I do get what you mean, and trust me I'm at no risk of being in the weaker position in a relationship ever again in my life. But when I picture it long term, if you pay for everything from the start, it is as if you are spoiling her and then she becomes used to it and entitled.

    To me it seems more about self respect, and usually women respect that and are attracted to it even more. When you set your boundaries and your reasons why. It has worked really well in my experience. Even if I had millions of dollars, I would still do the same thing, and when they understand that it comes out of respect for both them and yourself, as well as the consideration of a longer term thing, they usually are very much in appreciation of it.

    I do understand what you're saying but it sounds a bit too black and white.
     
  14. Ra's Al Ghul

    Ra's Al Ghul Fapstronaut

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  15. Infrasapiens

    Infrasapiens Fapstronaut

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    I remember watching a skit where at the end the man twists the neck of his date and then pays for the dinner only to find out that he had no more credit in his card. Do not do this.
     
    Tankus likes this.
  16. Ridley

    Ridley Fapstronaut

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    The line I use is "are you okay with splitting the bill?" It's never failed me once.
     
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  17. elevate

    elevate Fapstronaut

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    Just be clear about it. It's your belief and it's a boundary that you're setting. Don't make a joke out of it. If she doesn't like it, then she doesn't like it. No need to try and make her laugh about it or convince her in some unnecessary way.
     
    Tankus likes this.
  18. With a profile pic like mine women know there not splitting the bill with me;) they pay it and hope I don't ask for money lol
     
  19. Robbin6276

    Robbin6276 Fapstronaut

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    I have to say you are damn tight about it all (though i don't see anything wrong with buying a girl a drink if the convo is good and both seem interested, it's not weak really)
    Everything you say otherwise is bang on.

    In fact i think it's really shallow minded to believe (on what groybds exactly) that a woman who prefers a man to offer to pay for a date is in some way a lesser quality or subpar intellectually, socially or in her success in work and life.
    It just means that they understand the subliminal and unchangeable differences in how men and women are hardwired and they embrace it.
    Tanktus, where do you get the idea that a woman will get intitled as a defult if you offer to pay at treat her??!! And if 1 person does than you know they don't have grace and it's an individual matter,not a gender one. And you just move on. Doesn't mean that all women are like that. Don't be the one that forever make huge mistakes in categorising women like that. Unticipating the bad always. Well it somehow attracts karma to manifest it always.
    With a much better spirit of generosity i can assure you that women will appreciate it way more.
    And just like hailceasar said if you do match with a woman that only wants to pay half, she is a much more masculine one than you perhaps wish for. Tought and brainwashed that this is the new norm. But it's going against her very grain of femininity.
    You'll end up with someone just as square as yourself with very little attraction going on between you. She might as well go out with her friends and split the bill and you yours.

    If you don't get this, you haven't got how the female brain works.
    Good luck and be a gent, set yourself as a class man, and assure her you want to pay the bill, see what happens. Just see!!
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  20. Clarke

    Clarke Fapstronaut

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    "Let's just be friends" should do the trick.
     

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