but, for who ?

climberjunkie · Nov 22, 2015

Hello Yall,

My post yesterday brought me to another realization, may think I'm crazy for this but here it goes, this morning I woke up and realized that I'm alone. Sure I have friends in my town and people on my phone I could contact in a instant, but at that moment I woke up, no one existed. It was just me, myself, my books and backpack. As I'm writing this in this very moment, Its still me myself and I. Isn't it interesting the most simplest things in life sometimes we cannot see. you know once in a while when I visit the this website or the subreddit, I notice there is always 1 post that the issue being, or the question that's raised up is, "will I get a girlfriend from this though" and I think somewhere deep inside of us we are so afraid to be by our selves.

Although My ex girlfriend broke up with me the day before yesterday and I don't want to be a hypocrite, I have accepted it, but it still hurts me, no matter what type of remedy I try to come up with, its just human nature, its going to hurt and we must face the emotions at one moment or the other. Back to my main point of focus, you should not be doing nofap to get a girlfriend, and some of you may think this is an opinion and others may think this is a fact. But if your doing nofap to find a girlfriend, you still haven't learned the lesson, and your life may still be revolving around females. I was on the subreddit the other day and someone mentioned, that men of our generation are becoming more soft, effeminate.

Wouldn't surprise me, with so much entertainment and porn, we might as well grab a blanket and just lay there all day jerking away. But no, I will not accept that as our future, I ask all you Brothers, Yes Brothers, because were in this together, to unite, to do this for your health, your chi, your chakra, your vitality, whether christian or Buddhist or whatever, there is one thing we can all agree on, that were humans. Were not perfect, but we can still have unity and share a common goal.

So I ask of you to please acknowledge this and take some time to ask yourself, who am I doing this for? It may not be a comforting thought to know that you may be alone for a week or even a year, but that's only because the journey is starting.

(sorry if it seems like Im trying to spam) I just want to share the revelations I come across everyday, so maybe you wont have to go through as much pain as I am. (FYI my main point is, we should not let our self's be dependent on women, and be comfortable with being alone)

Thanks.

Battlemaster Lotus Praxis · Nov 22, 2015

Locco · Nov 22, 2015

I would point out that there are two kinds of loneliness - emotional and metaphysical.

Emotional loneliness come from not having anyone to talk to, share thoughts with, hug, kiss and fuck.

Metaphysical loneliness is the realization that we are born alone and we die alone.

A girlfriend can fix the first kind of loneliness to a great extent, but will not fix the second.

What you described in the first paragraph is the feeling of metaphysical loneliness. You rightfully reject the nofap motivation coming from the will to escape this kind of feeling, but then you give the wrong advice to not do nofap in order to get a girlfriend. I think the proper advice is following: it's perfectly ok to drop porn EXACTLY to get a girlfriend, but recognise that no girlfriend ever will remove your deep feeling of loneliness.

docker · Nov 22, 2015

One day a friend of mine told me, while we drunk coffee in my back yard. "I am planned to quit smoking". I asked him why he wants to do that? He replied to me because he didn't want to spend money on cigarets anymore.

What I am trying to say is that some times we must do one step back to see the whole picture and be more objective of our goals. Maybe then, we will realise that we have input our goal in a different priority. Loneliness (a huge subject here), emotional or metaphysical, has to do with us, our body, our hormones, our state of mind, our perspective in life. We feel alone when we feel empty inside of us while we are married, had girlfriends, friends, etc. Everything has to do first with our selves and then with others. If we try to find out a girlfriend to fill the gaps in our life, then something is wrong with our own gaps. The most important thing is to have a family, a beautiful wife who loves you, kids you adore and a happy life. That's the goal of every human being. But you should remember that everyone, even the future girlfriend, the wife, the husband, the friends or even your children, wants to fill his/her/theirs gaps through us. We should prepare ourselves first to be as fully as more we can be.

I am so sorry for your pain @climberjunkie
I hope and I wish your pain to be eliminated as soon as possible. We are the healers of ourselves. So, do you!

climberjunkie · Nov 22, 2015

Locco said: ↑

I would point out that there are two kinds of loneliness - emotional and metaphysical.

Emotional loneliness come from not having anyone to talk to, share thoughts with, hug, kiss and fuck.

Metaphysical loneliness is the realization that we are born alone and we die alone.

A girlfriend can fix the first kind of loneliness to a great extent, but will not fix the second.

What you described in the first paragraph is the feeling of metaphysical loneliness. You rightfully reject the nofap motivation coming from the will to escape this kind of feeling, but then you give the wrong advice to not do nofap in order to get a girlfriend. I think the proper advice is following: it's perfectly ok to drop porn EXACTLY to get a girlfriend, but recognise that no girlfriend ever will remove your deep feeling of loneliness.
Click to expand...

I think your repeating exactly what I was saying... My main point is that, you shouldent be doing nofap to get a girlfriend. As a man you cant emasculate yourself just for a girl.

climberjunkie · Nov 22, 2015

docker said: ↑

One day a friend of mine told me, while we drunk coffee in my back yard. "I am planned to quit smoking". I asked him why he wants to do that? He replied to me because he didn't want to spend money on cigarets anymore.

What I am trying to say is that some times we must do one step back to see the whole picture and be more objective of our goals. Maybe then, we will realise that we have input our goal in a different priority. Loneliness (a huge subject here), emotional or metaphysical, has to do with us, our body, our hormones, our state of mind, our perspective in life. We feel alone when we feel empty inside of us while we are married, had girlfriends, friends, etc. Everything has to do first with our selves and then with others. If we try to find out a girlfriend to fill the gaps in our life, then something is wrong with our own gaps. The most important thing is to have a family, a beautiful wife who loves you, kids you adore and a happy life. That's the goal of every human being. But you should remember that everyone, even the future girlfriend, the wife, the husband, the friends or even your children, wants to fill his/her/theirs gaps through us. We should prepare ourselves first to be as fully as more we can be.

I am so sorry for your pain @climberjunkie
I hope and I wish your pain to be eliminated as soon as possible. We are the healers of ourselves. So, do you!
Click to expand...

Whether Metaphysical or Physical, being dependent on a person to make you happy, says that your not happy with yourself, so I think there is engineering that needs to be done on ones own self.

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but, for who ?

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