Can someone answer this?

Discussion in 'Porn-Induced Sexual Dysfunctions' started by scjguy, Aug 9, 2019.

  1. scjguy

    scjguy Fapstronaut

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    I quit porn usage 7 months ago and now feel completely free of this addiction (no porn-related thoughts, cravings, correlations, nothing). However, in my last relationship, which ended 6 months ago, we did very porn-y/extreme stuff - always with some ED though I could maintain an 80-90% erection.

    I never stopped Ming, but decided to quit it 17 days ago. The problem is that I STILL have ED, and not even pills are able to help. The only situation in which I don't get ED is if sex has all the P-related/extreme scenario involved. I think I may say that I've just switched addictions, from P to extreme, but real sex (?)

    Does anybody relate? How can I get rid of this?
     
    Last edited: Aug 9, 2019
  2. MadJackMcMad

    MadJackMcMad Fapstronaut

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    You probably just need more than 17 days to get rid of PIED
     
  3. scjguy

    scjguy Fapstronaut

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    Yeah, but, I mean, the name PIED means porn-induced, and since I've been P-free for 7 months, I really did think things would get better. They haven't the least bit.
     
  4. You still have your brain stuck on those extreme things. Try to have normal sex without anything extreme from now. Let your body get used to the normal stuff like healthy foreplay and making love rather than just rough intercourse and porn induced harmful fetishes.
     
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  5. You've basically done porn in real life by bringing those fetishes into reality. Don't do that with your sex life. Just focus on your partner, enjoy the sex without these extreme fetishes. youll be fine.
     
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  6. scjguy

    scjguy Fapstronaut

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    Great, man. I'll definitey try this. Just bonding... You're absolutely right, I have made porn a real thing.
     
  7. Get a patient partner who understands you. Don't have sex with girls who will think "WTF this guy can't even have a boner. What a fag, etc" You get me right? You need someone whom you can open upto. When you're having sex with someone or about to have sex with someone, your ED shouldn't be bothering your mind, that will make it harder for you to get arousal. And youll only be able to get comfortable with someone who loves you, not just for sex. So don't go for one night stands or hookups or casual relationships now.
     
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  8. You’ve stayed away from porn for 7 months but only stopped masturbating 17 days ago. When you were M what were you thinking about? If it was past porn images, or even remembering hardcore past sexual experiences you’re keeping your brain in its porn state.
    What would help an alcoholic better? Someone who stays away from alcohol or someone who goes to a bar every night and only orders a coke? Obviously an alcoholic would have a difficult time in a bar- if you’re fantasizing about hardcore things your brain is getting the same rush as porn gave it.
     
  9. ItsInTheBag

    ItsInTheBag Fapstronaut

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    Not getting it up with meds is a classic symptom of PIED. (Since you can with other kind of "help", we can rule out a physical issue.)

    Also, for some guys it takes more than 1 year to rewire. Heard of extreme (and very rare) cases taking up to 2 years. May it not be your case.

    @Empty shell of a girlfriend may be onto something.
     
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  10. MarinoBigFan1984

    MarinoBigFan1984 Fapstronaut

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    You need way more than 17 days to come to any conclusion.
     
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  11. Daxos

    Daxos Fapstronaut

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    Easy. Your brain is still desensitized from too frequent and highly stimulating demanding releases, which heightens the bar your brain needs to reach to maintain proper erections. You need to reset your entire sexual centers for at least 60 days imo. So 60 days no sex, no thinking about sex, no nothing in any sexual context. You need to down-train your brains sexual responses. Your sexual centers are like a spoiled little brat, only the best toys and the highest demanding toys will satisfy. When you starve that annoying kid of any toys for 2 months, it will cry in happiness when it gets a wooden stick to play soldier with. This analogy concerns your brain as well. You need to cool down.

    60 days no sex, no masturbation, no sexual fantasies, no sexual anything. Do that, combined with cuddling and being around your girl, and you will have a steady fix coming your way.
     
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  12. scjguy

    scjguy Fapstronaut

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    Thank you very much, Daxos, I'll do as you said. May I ask why specifically 60 days?

     
  13. Daxos

    Daxos Fapstronaut

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    You are welcome my brother. 90-120 Days is actually the preferred way, since the brain needs about 90 days to fully free itself from addiction (according to literature about substance drugs and other addictions. That's why NoFap also holds the 90 day rule, since this is also an addiction). Most men in relationships, however, don't want to go 90 days or more because either themselves or their partner isn't willing to go 90 or more days without sex. I get that. I understand. And already having a relationship will speed up the reboot, so you could get away with just 60 days, as long as you don't go full overdrive with sex right after the 60 days. 30 Would be too few and not give the brain enough time to adjust and rewire. That's why 60 is the best IMO for people who want to do NoFap but not fore the recommend long times of 90-120 days.

    I still highly recommend 90 days to fully rewire your brain. Then it will be almost permanent and falling back to addiction will be much less likely.
     
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