Can't stop

[Igaleksus]

Guys, I just don't know what to do... please help me. maybe to read something, I am relapsing again and again. I tried to have a journal there, and on the others forums, I tried to participate in challenges, I even tried to pray, I tried to go to Sexoholics Anonymous... nothing helps, I am relapsing again and again, I don't have problems with erection or something, but that shame that came afterwards masturbation and depression, they are eating me, but when I have some clean time 4 or 5 days, the tension is so high, that I am starting masturbate again. I'm disgusted with myself, I can't do anything, I'm paralyzed by guilt and fear. Maybe there is some kind of sustainable plan?

 

[NewGeorge]

We've all been in similar points in our journey. The first days are the hardest but don't worry - they'll pass and it gets easier. I highly recommend you read Gary Wilson's Your Brain On Porn. I'd say it is the most useful thing that helped me get through this.

 

[jt850]

I'm in the same position man. After a few days, I get stuck in the same predicament and choose to watch porn. My therapist says I need to learn to embrace the pain and to just ride out my urges without acting out in using porn. Maybe that can help you too. Embrace the pain. Feel it. Learn to grab the bull by the horns and don't watch porn. Best of luck to you brother!

 

[DeeJ4y]

Occupy yourself and get out of your comfort zone from time to time. Focus on deep breathing when the urges come, do not argue with urges, ignore them and just focus on breathing. You can get "your brain on porn" audiobook from audible.com for free if you get the free trial of audible. It can help understand this addiction more. What ever you decide to do, just keep trying. I think everyone goes through phases of desperation and hopeless relapsing. It is a good thing that you are here since I am sure a lot of people can help you. I went through the starting phases of nofap alone and I am sure that it was one of the reasons I found it difficult to stop since I did not seek for advices.

About journaling; try to find patterns that precede a relapse. When that pattern repeats be extra careful for a possible relapse. Book your day full or take a long walk etc.

Also focusing on not relapsing today. Every day think that I am not going to relapse today. Everyone can make one day without relapsing. Then go to sleep and repeat. Focus on today.

Lastly writing reasons to stop PMO on a paper helps. I found it quite silly at first but after writing them I could realize and visualize all the benefits of abstaining and the negatives of PMO. Reading them everyday until you remember/ realize that the main reason of nofap is that there is so many positives to nofap and so many negatives to PMO that it is irrational and stupid to continue. That will not make you magically not wanting to PMO but the longer you insist the facts to yourself, the easier it is to ignore urges.

There is quite a lot to take in here so feel free to read them over again. There is so much more that I could add but for me these are the biggest advices I can give to you. Focus on taking care of yourself physically and emotionally. God bless you on your journey.