Casual sex
- Thread starter Vallabh28
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Hey Vallabh. To be honest, this is a question best answered by yourself. Outsiders like myself do not have sight of the values you hold yourself to, the culture in which you were brought up, your goals nor the issues you are facing.
Some people might say it’s okay to have casual consensual sex. Some might draw the line at visiting sex workers. Some might say it’s better to just masturbate than have pre-marital sex. Some might say to stay away from it all.
Our views don’t matter as much as what you think you should do. You know yourself best.
Some people might say it’s okay to have casual consensual sex. Some might draw the line at visiting sex workers. Some might say it’s better to just masturbate than have pre-marital sex. Some might say to stay away from it all.
Our views don’t matter as much as what you think you should do. You know yourself best.
Jewel_kitty
Fapstronaut
I'm more of an extremist so not sure if my opinion will be received well, but I think it's best to stay away from sex altogether especially casual sex.
It's really a waste of semen, masculine energy, and sexual energy, which is the most potent, raw form of energy that exists.
But I think what @teabug said up above is right these are simply my beliefs. I'm a very spiritual, god following individual, and as I said an extremist so my views don't appeal to everyone.
Do what you see is best, but I encourage you to view both sides of the argument, and everything in between. See which one your gut tells you is right, for your gut will never lie to you.
The mind is deceiving, and its logic is often flawed in emotional cases.
And if you don't know what voice in your head is your gut, just do what you think is best in the long run, and after a certain amount of time assess everything.
Is this what I want from life?
Am I working towards my goals?
What will my legacy be?
How has my life changed in the past month? etc, etc.
That's what I did (without the testing bit I have a strong intuition), and this is where I landed. Every man has his own journey of life to go through, and this is part of yours. Our lives will never look identical to one another, they weren't meant to be so naturally our paths, and purposes in life will differ as well.
Try it out see what works
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cleaningupmyact
Fapstronaut
Keep in mind, you are asking a place full of PMO / sex addicts if casual sex is OK. Lol, I imagine most will say "HELL YES!"
PMO is often a symptom of deeper problems related to sex addiction, in my experience. I say that I am addicted to "selfish sexual behavior" -- I used people, the same way I used videos and pictures and audio to selfishly goon and fappy fap the snake meat into a crusty old sock.
with sex and PMO addiction, people become objects to use for the addicts fulfullment. There is never "enough" in addiction, so I've sought more and more partners / victims as the years went on, trying to scratch that "itch" of loneliness, vacancy in my soul, and the "restless, irritable, and discontent" feeling. I can't "deal" with life normally, I don't feel like I fit in the world. PMO and sex just happen to be the drug that worked "best" for me.
In 12 Step recovery we begin to learn something about healthy sexuality, a new concept for most of us. How sex is best when followed (in the hours and day after) by a sense of gratitude, enjoyment, fulfilment, nourishment, and connection. Feeling calm, contented, and connected is wonderful after sex, and can be a positive vulnerable space of growth and healing.
Can that be accomplished with casual sex?
Sure, but it's rare. Most casual sex "hookup culture" is about doing the opposite - it's about 2 people using each other as objects (or a predator / victim) to scratch their respetive "itch" to get the "fix" of a drug addict.
As a sex addict myself, I need to watch out for that.
Casual sex is not recommended for newcomers in recovery. But after some years of sobriety, I may re-explore healthy ways of engaging in it (on occassion, for example someone I like visiting from out of town).