Celibacy Vow

I've been kicked around, urinated on, tossed around and into the dumpster. I've been with four ladies in the last two years, and they all got what they wanted from me, and tossed me out when It was convenient for them. I feel like I gave my flower of my heart, only to have it sprayed with toxic pesticides, wilt and die.

There is no expression, curse or word to describe this feeling. You would only know if its happened to you. Twice I fell to deep depression of degeneration, drunkenness, Rage, Confusion, suicidal thoughts, Hating my self, and falling from God. I've now had almost two years of misery from my cleaved heart. The great goals I once had to better our people, our planet and all its creatures a forgotten dream...

I live in misandric Toronto, though I realize I have made mistakes none of them so grievous as the anti male society demanding subjugation of my soul, and the relinquishing of my honour. All on my quest to make myself a good man. The women in my life has continuously desolated my Vitality and belief in my self.

From my research on Societies all over the earth, only now do we see normalization of Whoredom, mass prostitution, encouragement of debaucherous sex anywhere anytime and with anyone! Previously we had moral constraints on sex, thus the sacredness of it being rightly upheld. Now, in a satanic sex cult we live And I have lived in it.

In my experience and estimation, there can only be one safe course for men who wish to live a sanguine life. A life of Love, Fecundation, liberty, justice, honor and courage. I will not waste gods sacred life energy again. Nor will I allow any evil women to tempt me of her forbidden fruit...

Celibacy, being of God is the only route.. Until Marriage.

 

Thank you guys. @ Bale I have never surrendered here. I never will. I mean I have very strong feelings about these women and what they did, doesn't go away. I blame them, yes. I blame myself too. I learned. We have to protect ourselves against women these days. A lot more than our parents did. U sure ask many questions, but Is it not clear that I am trying to grow by what I said and the fact I am here? This world is really hard for men to become men, and to know how to be right with a Lady, and how to chose a right Lady.

U ask if I justify this situation because of them? Perhaps you are right. Justification? They really affected my heart very much for very long, So I see your point... but those feelings made me depressed for a long time, and I couldnt even get out of bed. cause I was to young and weak to stop it, to know what was right and wrong. These things out not to happen to men with a good heart I tell you. Society has taught us wrong. I Want what happened to me not to be okay ever again, to anyone.

Dealing with my emotions.. that is the whole reason for this. And I think that is something very personal nobody can tell another how the right way is on that.

I want to be so strong, that women cannot tempt me anymore, and I wont be committing adultery in my heart, by looking and fantasizing, and fapping. To take God's energy, and not to fornicate it, but to fecundate it, as best I can for Terra. That is why I am here.