change of mind: my personal francis macomber story

i started to play ice hockey in 2014; i always loved the sport and the manliness in it; i had fun, but on ice, especially in league games, i would be very nervous and anxious. i knew i had it in me to play better: when i played with family and friends on the lake i would play good, but when i was playing w my team i would be scared, as if. not scared of hits, but just too timid, shy; on and off ice.

well, this year everything changed: i started nofap in january, completed nonut february, and in march i think i played the best game of my life. it was a life changer for me, bc for the first time i played as if without fear; i was furious, full of rage, giving hits all the time; after the first few shifts everytime i was on the ice opponent players would come after me and try to hit me; i enjoyed the game thoroughly and afterwards we were all good friends and shook the hands ofc. well we still lost 1-10, but for me, it was the best game of my life, and i was commended and respected by my team and coach.

what happened? my mind changed. the way i saw the world, the game, and most importantly, myself, changed. i attribute everything to nofap.

now, several months later, the new season starts, and already i feel even bigger shift in mindset: on and off ice, i feel more confident. for years, when i was in the locker room, i would feel awkward, not knowing how to interact properly, laughing when everyone else laughed, trying to stay low profile, trying to hide behind beers to overcome that feeling of estrangement. not anymore. i know who i am now. i know it, and respect myself.

the best is: more is yet to come. i know it, i feel it. i mean, i havent even completed the 90days yet, so more has to come, undoubtedly.

About my journey (so far):
Since end of january this year I've had two 40 something streaks, one 30 something streak, and couple week- streaks in between.

I didn't want to post a success story until i had the reboot complete, but i wanted to share this experience with you, to show you, that even despite relapses and struggles, change occurs.

will report back at 90days

PS: francis macomber is a short story written by ernest hemingway, depicting a guy "who never lived" and who only started really living during a buffalo hunt in africa (only to be killed by his wife shortly after, hence the title "the short and happy life of francis macomber")